Family

Hearing the sharp whistle from the masheans from down the way Amanda wasts no time moving around the counter and heading quickly to Ryan's room.

Pushing past Leo, Amanda jumps right in thankful for JT's extra hands. It was always nice having another dr around in case there was something she over looked.

After many hours when hope almost seemed lost Amanda stops and whips her forehead. Leting out a long breath she had been holding Amanda looks over Ryan once again before looking back to JT the look on her face was grim.

"For now she is, thank you for the help JT. I need to talk with Leo. If you would like to come along to know whats going on I dont mind."

Turning to head out of the room she had to talk to Leo. It was very important and really it couldn't wait.

"Leo? Its good to see you again I just wish it was under better conditions."

Experiencing her hand to him Amanda gives it a shake and trys to force a smile thought her eyes still held much behind them.

"Ryan is stable for the time being. but its as I had feared her body is rejecting the blood. Slowly and painfuly her body is going to shut down, her organs cant functions right with out blood. Anyone will be able to see her though we will limit the amount of time. Ryan is going to be in and out of contentiousness. We will do all we can to keep her comfortable but it really wont be a pretty sigh."

Amanda takes in a deep breath before letting out. Just the thought of what would happen to Ryan if they didnt find her family made her cringe. She hatted knowing anyone would have to go through that. They would do all they could do for Ryan but it was the inevatable.

"There really is no way of saying how long she had depending on how her body reacts but I am giving her a month. You will be able to tell as the days go on how sick she is getting unless we can find her family. Did you have any luck leo?"

Emergency

Leo spins around, his heart leaping into his throat. "Ryan? Ryan!" In an instant, he's back in the hall, yelling for help. He didn't know what was wrong, but something was.

JT is just heading down the hall, ready to go home after working a double-shift, when he hears the cry for help. Immediately on alert, he jogs to the room, almost running into Amanda and several nurses. Most likely they had enough help, but he lends a hand anyway, while ordering Leo to stay out of the way.

Working alongside Amanda without much elbow room, JT gives directions to the nurses, but follows Amanda's lead, since it is her patient. Sweat runs down the side of his face as they work to revive Ryan. He never liked losing anyone, no matter the situation.

Finally, finally they get a pulse. JT lets out the breath he's been holding, and steps back, giving Amanda more room. "Is she stabilizing?"

Leo paces the hall, chewing on his thumbnail as he waits.

More problems

Letting out a sigh Ryan watchs Leo. She didnt want him to go but she didnt know how to make him stay. Her stomach churned, and she felt all messed up.

Continuing to watch Leo a sudden pain hits Ryan's stomach making her gasp for air just a little as she can feel her heart start racing. Something wasnt right, it felt terribly wrong. Opening her mouth to say something nothing comes out as the moniter in the room start to beep a little faster. Fear races through Ryan's eyes as she trys to gasp for words. Finally getting a whisper out.

"L....Le..o...get h...he...lp.."

Leaning her head back Ryan's eyes roll back into her head as the monters let out a syron sounds as the flat line, a sound that could strike fear into a heart of stone.

Giving a smile as he his mounts his own horse and ties it up Dan takes in a long deep breath. This air had a little bite to it but it was still nice.

Seeing Mick and BJ Dan throws a small wave just staying quiet and letting Mick and his daughter talk know everything was none of his never mind.

Hearing Mick's question to him Dan smiles and gives a nod walking over to BJ who was struggling to carry the basket alone.

"Sure I can do that."

Bending down in front of the small boy Dan gives a smile.

"Hey there Little man. I see your doing a good job there with you muscles but I feel left out can I help you?"

Smiling up at Dan BJ smiles.

"You can help so you don feel lef out than you can have some apple pie too."

Dan reachs out and ruffles Dan's hair before lifting the basket and helping BJ leading him to the truck.

Apple tree dwellers

Leo bites his lip, now fighting his own emotions. He really did like Ryan... but he didn't know how to get past this.

"Alright, well..." Without knowing what else to do, Leo stands up and aims for the door. "Get well soon. Everybody misses you at the shop."


Jade laughs out loud as she races beside Dan. Daring to turn her head and watch him ride, she knows he isn't pushing his horse, and neither is she. It was more fun not to be a cutthroat.

Gaining speed, it doesn't take long at all until the far bend where they have to slow. Pulling the mare down to a lope, jog and finally a walk, Jade catches her breath, laughing again. "Ohhh I needed that." She throws Dan a grin. "Nothing like spending your energy on a horse. I miss it out here."

Taking a deep breath of the fresh air, she urges her mount forward, confident of where she was. Within minutes, they came upon the small apple tree grove. Jade slows to a stop and dismounts, grabbing a rope and halter to tie her horse to a nearby fence.

Ducking under a couple low branches, she finally spots Mick and BJ in a clearing. "Hey! Quit stealing those ranch apples!"

Mick snaps his head up from looking in the bucket that BJ was "helping" him carry. A look of bewilderment crosses his face, and then a smile of surprise. "Jade?"

Unable to contain her energy, she gives a little squeal and runs to him, to receive a big hug. "Mmmm hi, Dad."

Mick chuckles and swings her around. "Hey, babe. What are you doing here?"

"Glad to see you too," Jade retorts sarcastically, but she can't help a giggle. "I wanted to surprise you."

"Well, you did that." Mick slings his arm over her shoulder, and only then realizes that Dan is there too. "Don't tell me you forgot how to get out here," he teases Jade.

She elbows him. "Of course not. Dan was just being my bodyguard."

Mick raises his eyebrows. "For...?"

"Evil apple tree dwellers. They resemble a cross between a wolf and a crab apple. Ugly critters."

Mick laughs and shakes his head. "Now come on, why are you here?"

"Vacation."

"Vacation? What about school?"

Jade bites her lip. "Can we talk about this later."

Mick stops walking and hands off the task of throwing out bad apples to BJ before looking back at his daughter. "Don't tell me. You changed your mind."

"Maybe?"

"I bet your grandmother is thrilled about that."

"I'd rather face the apple tree dwellers."

Mick tries hard not to laugh, and finally just shakes his head. "Well, I'm not happy you went that far just to turn around, but I can't blame you for not wanting to go to that girl's school." He sighs and gives her ponytail a tug. "We'll talk more later. How long you staying?"

"Um... that's to be determined?"

Mick's eyes narrow. There was a much bigger story here, but it wasn't one to try and go over while under the apple trees. "Alright... like I said, we'll talk later." He glances to Dan. "Hey, you wouldn't mind taking BJ back in the truck would you? I'll take the horse back."

I guess

Ryan felt at a loss for words witch was something that didnt happen with her much. But she was, anything she thought she could say just didnt feel like it would help or even change Leo's mind. She did understand why Leo was upset, she probably would be too.

"I..."

Ryan choaks on her own words just not knowing what to say some sweat rolling down her face. She wanted to turn back time and ask Leo out on her own, her heart hurt so much. The hot flashes she was experiencing seemed to fit her mood.

"I guess thats...thats best than since I cant do anything else to change your mind. I hope sometime we can try again. I'd...like that."

Closing her eyes for a moment Ryan fights the tears the want to come and turn into a headache. She didnt know what else to say, or do she had never delt with this before.

Trowing Jade a wink at her challenge Dan was ready. He new the path pretty well, and it was a safe one though caution would still be needed.

"I was born ready, I hope you are."

Taking off with Jade a smile flashs across Dan's face as the wind rushs over him. Catching up with Jade her keeps the same pase as her not moving ahead but not falling behind eather. It wasnt about winning to him, but just spending time with someone and having a break from work.

Better to be apart

Leo sighs and slouches in the chair. This conversation was inevitable, but that didn't make it any more enjoyable.

"Sorry - I guess I meant the guys at the shop too. Just thought if you were lonely...." He stops and shakes his head. "Just forget it," he mumbles.

Waiting a moment, he leans forward to steady his elbows on his knees. "You've said enough times you're sorry. I guess I believe it, so you can stop. Saying it more times doesn't help any."

His eyes roam the room as he pauses again. "I don't know if I really believe you fell for me or not. You know I always liked you, but I like a lot of girls. That's why I get razzed so bad. The problem is, you never would have given me a second glance, had there not been a bet involved. Whether you care now or not, isn't the point. It was all based on a bet for money. I can't just forget that happened."

He shrugs lamely. "It's not that easy for me. I don't want to be enemies... I don't like being enemies with anybody. But maybe this just wasn't meant to be, ya know? All my life, I've been looking in from the outside. I'm the clown, the goofoff, the idiot in the crowd that makes people laugh and gives them something to poke fun at. It's always been that way. Then I thought I finally had something that was real. This time it was me with the hot chick under my arm and I could say "hands off, she's mine." And then..."

More emotion came through than intended, and Leo swallows hard. "Then I found out it was built on nothing. You said yes just to prove a point, not because you wanted to."

Shifting his weight, he finds Ryan's eyes again. "I'm not saying never. Just... I think it would be better to be apart for a while. Maybe then if you still care, I'll know it's real."


Finding the right tack with a bit of help from Dan, Jade is glad she'd worn her boots today so she didn't have to go change. Saddling up only took a few minutes, and in no time at all, both riders are headed out of the ranch yard. Jade knew which way to go, and knew it would be easier to go around several of the pastures instead of having to open gates along the way. And the longer route provided more time for a nice run as well.

Once she was confident the mare was warmed up, she glances over to Dan, a challenging glint in her eye. "Alright, hotshot. Let's see what you got."

Leaning forward just a little, she presses her heels into the mare's sides and springs into a run. This path was a smooth one and Jade knew it was a safe route for a nice gallop.

I'm trying

"Why would I want to call a truce and walk away when I like you Leo?"

A tiny bit of hurt was hinted in Ryan's voice as she talked she new what Leo was saying and she new he was hurt but she has said she was sorry what else could she do?

"I'm trying here Leo to make things right, After I really started to fall for you I tryed making it right and thats what I was doing the night I was shot too. Trying to make things right. I said I was sorry I dont know what else to do to make you see I am sorry and I do like you."

Shaking her head Ryan turns her head away from Leo as she looks out the window for a long moment. If one looked close Ryan looked like she was sweating, was she having a hot flash? She didnt know but she felt awfley warm.

"As for my pals they arnt my pals or my friends. The only real people I even considered friends were you and the guys at the shop. So if your not going to stay than dont bother telling anyone to come and see me."

Blushing just a little Jess looks up into Axel's eyes. This point in life is what she had been waiting for and now that she had found it she off\ten wondered how people could go through life without it.

Not saying anything else Jess just looks across the table at Axel the smile staying on her face. No more words needed to be said for Axel could see deeper and new before words said it how much she cared and loved him.

A grin form on Dan's own face knowing Jade new her was around just fine. Shifting his weaght a little he eyes a few of the horses he had left. He needed a break anyways it should hurt to take a short one before work would it?

"I do believe that was a challange, and one I am willing to take."

Walking with Jade to the tak room Dan helps her with the items for the horse she wanted before going back for his own and gettering ready. Once Dan was ready he waited to make sure Jade was as well.

Last one there...

Leo turns back around, his eyes a little dim. Sighing deeply, he comes back over to the bed and sinks down into a chair, just looking at Ryan for a moment. It was obvious she was trying... but what was the point?

"Look, Ryan... I just wanted to come say hi. I... didn't want to get into anything else. If you're lonely, I'll let some of your pals know and have them come up to pay you a visit but... as far as my own visits go... I don't really see the point in trying too hard here. You, um... gave me a good time." He purses his lips, obviously sorry. "But when it's all over... I could have done without the humiliation and embarrassment. So... how about we just call a truce and walk away?"


Axel smiles a little and pulls Jess' hand up to his lips to give it a soft kiss. "I'd like you to go with me... at the very least, I'll have something pretty to look at while I wait."


Jade's eyes lock with Dan's for a long moment, and she bites her lip as a grin forms. "Far field, huh? The east one?"

Folding her arms, she glances around Dan to some of the horse stalls. "I don't feel much like walking, but I do feel like a ride. I'd say after we saddle up, last one there has to help peel all those apples."

Lonely

Ryan could feel the awkwardness in the air, and new what Leo was saying about the other woman. She had been a pawn to use to make Ryan jealous, and it had worked. Seeing that Leo was walking away again Ryan wanted to say more even if she didnt know how. Letting out a small chuckle she replys.

"Bother me?"

Ryan turns off the tv and throws the remote on the table next to the bed before laying back a little.

"I'm not exactly going anyway, I am stuck here for goodness knows how long."

Lifting her arm up and motioning around the room Ryan gives a small shakes of her head rolling her eyes a little not at Leo but at herself.

"..and its not exactly like I have a line of people waiting to see me eather. You can stay longer if you want, I'd like you to anyways. Kind of lonely here."

Looking up at Axel Jess gives a tine smile and a small sigh. She just wanted to try and help Axel all she could and it really was the only thing she could do for him.

"I know..just hoped I guess that the motion would maybe help some how."

Just holding His hand for a long moment Jess looks at there hands intertwined with each other.

"When you go to see Misty if you...want me to come along I would be more than happy too.'

Looking back at the pretty young face that stared back at him Dan could feel a little heat creep up his neck. Mick had mentioned he had a daughter and a son, but he never said he daughter was very pretty.

Taking his stetson off and holding it in one hand Dan holds out his other to meet Jade's shaking it firmly.

"Names Dan and its very nice to meet you Jade."

Thinking for a long moment Dan put the hat back on top of his head looking down at the ground for a moment and than back up at Jade.

"Last time I checked you Dad was out helping BJ in the far field gather some apples from some fresh apple pie. If you would like I would be more than happy to walk over there with you to get him. I need to ask Mick something anyways."

Dan wore a pleasant smile as an offer of friendship knowing Jade didnt venture to the ranch much and things had changed a little since the last time she was here.

Unsaid

Leo ambles a little closer, his motions a bit awkward. He doesn't say much, letting Ryan lead any conversation. When she mentions the other girl though, his eyes drift to the floor, then back up again. He gives her a lame shrug.

"She's um... not the new girl." All he can do is shrug again. "She... never was. I was just... she..." He clams up, knowing Ryan knew well enough to figure it out on her own. His face gets just a little red.

"I just... wanted to come say hi, I guess. Um... I don't want to bother you." He turns around, debating whether or not to leave. There was way to much going unsaid.


Axel mulls over Jess' suggestion. "Guess it can't hurt to see if Carson can hook me up there. I wouldn't mind another option and I know I can trust the guys over at the Elite."

He takes a sip of his water, continuing to listen and he nods. "Yeah... I know what you mean. Ryan was stupid, but... even so, forgiveness has to come in there somewhere, otherwise everyone will just stay miserable."

Glancing down as Jess takes his hand, he just looks at it for a moment, then reaches over with his other hand to cover hers, stopping the motion. "I can't feel it anymore," he explains quietly. He gives her hand a squeeze. "Thanks, though."


Jade whips around at the strange voice behind her. Looking up at Dan, she lifts her eyebrows, then blinks. "Ma'am? You must be the new guy Dad told me about."

Tucking a stubborn strand of hair behind her ear, she stretches out her hand. "I'm Jade. Mick's my dad, I was just looking for him. He doesn't know I'm here though, so I'm not surprised I can't find him. I... did forget your name though."

New Face

Sitting up in bed her arm still bandaged Ryan flipped mindlessly through the channels. There really wasnt anything good on and she hated being in the room and told not to go anywhere. She wanted to be outside, driving working on cars...and...laughing with Leo.

As if on cue or planed to have a though and action lined up Ryan hears a noise as the door and looks up to see Leo. A smile grin forms on Ryan's face as she gives a nod.

"Its safe as long as you dont mind the smell of flowers, and being a little cold. Personally, I'd take the smell of burning oil and grease over this."

Letting out a small sigh and leaning back in the bed Ryan turns lets out a small sigh before looking at Leo again. She felt a little awkward not really knowing all of what to say.

"Not that I mind it, but I'm...surprised to see you here. Happy you came, but surprised. How have you been Leo? Has the new girl been treating you right? I'd hate to have to clock her one."

Taking a sip of her own OJ Jess looks at Axel across the room. It had been an early morning that didnt have much sleep the night before, just one of those nights that wernt so good and every little noise bothered her. But Hearing Axel's voice and getting the chanse to come to breakfest with him was something she hadnt wanted to turn down.

"You know, for a while when I was with Carson he would talk about Misty his feonsay. I always new he loved her and they were ment to be together but he told me she was quite smart in the medical field."

Looking down again Jess gives a smile for the memories she had. It was before Axel, to right when she was getting to know him. If it wasnt for Carson she never would of met Axel and known what real love was like.

"Maybe you should go see her. I mean I know you have been to Dr. before and everything but maybe she could use her smarts and figure something out to help. Its worth a shot at this point right?"

Taking a bit of her food she new was going cold Jess lets the silence linger for a long moment thinking. Axel had given her a short version of what was going on so she new the fine line but anything more she didnt know.

"Yeah, but whats being said I guess it makes me wonder if Ryan was there would it still be said or not? Seems to me like the reson she got shot to start with was to try and stop this whole thing for Leo's sake. I guess I'd want someone to have my back if stuff like that was going around too."

Looking up at Axel again Jess gives a small smile as she reaches over the table to give his hand a rub like she had many a time before.

"Not that I am saying what she did was right to start with at all, its just I dont know I guess I feel bad for them both. Do you know how Ryan is doing?"

"Whoa, easy there girl."

Holding the horses still Dan files the nail down not really paying to much attachen to anything else. Alot of hands had off today doing other things so that left Dan with alot of work. Not that he minded much it was nice to keep him mind off things.

Hearing a voice break through the quiet Dan trys to keep the horse steady. Not bothering to yell back so he didnt startle the more.

Finally finishing up and hearing the soft steps pass Dan pokes his head out from the stall in time to see the younger woman poke her head into the tak room door he had left open a little. Stepping outside the stall Dan new there would be no way he could let her know he was there and not scair her.

"Excuse me Ma'am could I help you?"

Stir crazy

Left alone once again, Gunner just sits for a long while. Refusing supper, he eventually drifts into a restless sleep, depressed and without much hope for tomorrow. He felt weak... he felt embarrassed... he felt guilty.


Once Con returns to TJY with Hope, he goes to let Reese know what happened. It's agreed to keep the whole thing quiet for now. Unless someone asked where Gunner was, they would work around it until a better time, or until they knew more.


The next day was a dark and gray one. Rain poured down, odd for such a dry land. The air was warm, but damp, making it seem chillier than it was.


Leo wanders down the hospital hall, having turned around twice, then come back. He wasn't sure why he was here. He was still upset. But a part of him must have cared... at least he figured that was the only reason he'd shown up here today.

Sighing, he tucks his hands in the pockets of his cargo pants and heads to the room again. This time he gets to the door and knocks lightly, cocking his head so he can see inside. Spotting Ryan sitting up in bed, he eyes her a little warily. "Safe to come in?"


"...so I don't know. I can't pay for surgery and even if I could, it might not do any good." Axel shrugs and leans back in the booth at the diner, looking across at Jess. "But I'm running out of money without having a job... so I gotta either find a solution or go looking for work I can do, bu even that's gonna be hard to find."

A mid-morning breakfast had brought them together today, even though they'd just had supper together the evening before.

"I guess it's not bad I haven't been in the shop anyway though... sounds like that whole Ryan and Leo thing is going around and I'm just as glad I don't have to listen to it."


Gunner picks at the toast on his plate and finally shoves it away. Getting up, he paces, his bare feet sounding on the tile floor. Giving a groan of frustration, he turns, increasing the circles he walked. He felt like a caged animal. He wanted his astronomy books. He wanted a window. He wanted his laptop. He wanted to write. But for now, silence was the only thing keeping him company, and he felt as if he would go insane... and it hadn't even been twenty-four hours.

Running his hands through his hair, he finally drops to the floor to do some pushups, trying to spend his energy.


"Helloooo." Jade pokes her head into the barn, looking around, but sees no one but the horses. Smirking, she wanders in, leaning into one of the stalls to talk to a mare. "Did they all leave, or what, hmm?" She reaches out to stroke the velvety cheek. "Yeah, you're a pretty girl, aren't you. Seen my dad around, or do I have to go hunt him down?"

Obviously not receiving a response, Jade sighs and aims down the dirt-floored aisle. "Dad?" she calls. No answer. She hadn't checked the dining hall yet but it was after lunchtime, so she'd assumed someone would be out here.

Almost giving in to go to the main house, she looks in one more spot. Finding the tackroom door open, she looks in. "Anybody home?"

The Shadow

Looking at Gunner with sympathy and understanding for his own free time Hope gives a small nod and a pat to his hand.

"I'll keep your stuff on the roof waiting for when you return and I promise Reese wont get to it."

Standing Hope makes her way to the door before turning to Gunner again giving a small smile.

"Remember your not alone, and if you need anything, even just a friend to sit with you I am only a phone call away and I will never turn my back on you. See you soon Gunner."

With that Hope turns and leaves the door giving a small sigh and a nod to Con. She didnt know if he wanted to say goodbye as well.

Returning the quick kiss to Kyle Alice slides over in the seat to let Kyle in. His warmth entering the jeep with him and filling her with such an energy it was a nice feeling after the last few days.

Taking a bit of her doughnut and a sip of her pop Alice just listens to Kyle as the smile on her face grows even more hearing what the plans for today were.

"I think checking it our first is a good idea. At least than you can say you tryed."

Taking Kyle's free hand in her own Alice gives it a gentil squeeze.

"I'll be with you every step of the way. The shadow follows on. Thank you."

Admit

Gunner lifts his eyes as Hope approaches, but simply shrugs then shakes his head. "Nah... what could I ask for anyway? Nothing in or out of this place, you know that. This whole thing got started because I wanted something, remember? I better cut it out before it really gets me in trouble."

Letting one leg slide down, he leans his head against the wall. "This nightmare is my own. Just make sure nobody gets my stuff up on the roof of TJY... I got a telescope and books up there. But do me a favor and don't tell Reese... that was one thing he didn't know about."


Kyle grins and leans closer to the open window, coming to Alice's eye level. "You think I woulda gotten you a donut without boston cream?"

His grin widens as he moves in to steal a light kiss to her lips. "Move over so I can crowd your space."

Joining Alice in the jeep, Kyle passes her a donut and a can of pop. "Figured I'd need all the pep I could get this morning... since I'm going to go see Erik." He flips the top on his mountain dew and takes a long sip, scanning the outside for a long moment. "I'm gonna see what he's got and what the band is like before I say no... or yes."

He turns his head to look at Alice again. "I, um... thought a lot last night and... I think maybe it's time for me to admit where my passion still lies."

Boston

The tip to the hospetal is quiet as Hope knows what was to come. She had sent people to this place before for there safty, for there health but it was never fun and it was a long hard road.

Going through the motions that Hope had been through many times she sticks close to Gunner making sure he had the best room, and care that was available. This was more than just a case this was a friend too.

Finally it is time to go and though she would rather not Hope new they had to. But she would be back soon. Looking up at the dr hope searchs his eyes for a long moment. She hadnt delt with this hospetal much before so she was a little werry but she would trust Reese new this place.

"I want to know everything that goes on with him and about his care. If anything happens anytime you are to contact me. I am his primary Psychiatrist outside of here and I have the need to know. Thank you for everything you will be doing for him."

Turning to the room where Gunner was Hope enters and makes her way across the bear floor. Sitting down on the edge of the bed she lets out a sigh.

"Con and I our heading out now Gunner. I'll be back tomorrow to check in on you. Did you need anything before I go?"

Looking up from her computer as the jeep started to shake Alice could of guess who it was. A big smile spreads across her face as she looks out the back window and gives a shake of her head.

It was good to see Kyle smiling today even if she didnt know the reason. He had a nice smile and it was important to her to see it.

Rolling down the window as Kyle comes around to her side Alice gives a chuckle never tiring of Kyle or of his antics that matched her own.

"Mountain Dew and Donuts....mmmmm..."

Alice thinks for a long moment before giving Kyle another side long glance.

"If you have Boston cream in there than come on in and lets feast together."

Breakfast

Gunner doesn't respond at first, but numbly follows to Con's truck, sliding into the back seat. He sits with his gaze out the window, fighting the burning behind his eyes. "Do with me what you have to," he mutters in defeat. He knew they would take him somewhere other than TJY and other than home. "Just have someone take care of my cat."

Con quirks an eyebrow as he turns his truck around. "I didn't think the apartments where you lived allowed pets."

"They don't." A small grin quirks the edge of Gunner's mouth.

Con rolls his eyes. No wonder Gunner always got himself into trouble. "Always gotta buck the system, don't you?"

"Always."


Three souls make their way across town to the far corner. A hospital comes into view. Had not the purpose been so dim, it would have seemed cheerful. They are greeted warmly with those trained to handle these kinds of visits. Unfortunately, these doctors performed these tasks every day.

An hour slips by... then two. It felt a torture to an already-tortured soul. One minute, Gunner wanted to stay, and the next, he wanted to flee. During the initial evaluation, it was only Con's muscle that held him there. Now it was a closed door...

Gunner sits on the bed, his back leaned into the corner of the room. His arms were wrapped around his knees, his legs up to his chest. He felt... numb. The room was stark. A small table was at one side with a chair. A lamp sits on an otherwise-bare nightstand. A narrow closet in the corner held two more sets of clothes, simple and clean. He could keep nothing of his own.

His bare toes curl down into the mattress and he grits his teeth, half of him wanting to run full-force into the door and bolt. Logic argued with him to stay.

Outside in the hall, a doctor's voice mingles with Con's and Hope's...

"You can let him know you're leaving, if you wish. Tomorrow we will have another evaluation and... we'll go from there."


Alice's red jeep begins to rock back and forth, back and forth. Kyle stands on the bumper, shifting his weight and bouncing to make it sway until he sees Alice look out the window at him. For the first time in quite a while, his eyes are shining brightly. He holds up his hands. In one, he holds a bag of donuts, and in the other, two cans of mountain dew.

Cocking his head, he jumps down from the bumper and wanders to the window, waiting for it to be rolled down. "I need sugar this morning... how about joining me?"

Alone

Hope wants to comment back to Gunner but she new better than to do so right now. Just giving a soft smile Hope does her best to try and keep Gunner calm and thinking right. Seeing Con go around to him the other way gives Hope a small bit of comfort knowing her was there. As he takes Gunner's arm and pulls him back over the rail Hope lets out a sigh of releaf that she didnt even relize she was holding till now.

As Gunner stops in front of her Hope lays a gentil warm hand on his arm her own heart breaking on the inside. She hated doing this to someone, anyone but it was what was best and she new it.

"No Gunner, Reese was wrong your a very strong person and thats why you didn't jump when you had the chance."

Wrapping her arm around his wast Hope walks with Gunner back to Con's car before getting inside with him.

"We are gonna get you help Gunner and I am going to be with you every step of the way. I wont let you do this alone."

Cherished

Gunner's eyes narrow slightly and he looks back to Hope. A terrible battle was raging within him. He knew exactly what she was doing, and therefore he wanted to retaliate. Yet another piece of him wanted the help that she was offering. He wanted to jump... he didn't want to jump.

Even though he didn't show it, he really did like Hope. She was nice and even though he said he couldn't trust her, a part of him did. He knew who she was and what she was about, and he knew that she would never deceive him. But this... today... he didn't know what he wanted more: to live or to die.

"I've put people through worse," he responds. "I've killed people, remember?" He studies the ravine again. "Maybe if I go today, it'll be an even trade."

While Gunner talks, Con takes the cue from Hope and ever so slowly walks with her, swinging wide to get around to the other side.

Gunner moves a little closer to the edge and a small rock tumbles down, pulled by gravity. He grins again. "Can't be that bad, right? Better than wasting half my life searching for something that doesn't exist. Better than living, knowing I'm the one that killed my own past." He makes another small move, and for several moments, silence rules. But it gives Con just enough time.

Gunner feels the large hand on his shoulder and he swallows hard without turning around. "Don't let me fall, Con," he whispers.

Con doesn't hear, but he takes the opportunity of calm to slip an arm around Gunner's chest and gently pull him back, helping him over the guardrail again. Con's pulse is racing and he looks to Hope for help again. "C'mon, Gunner..." he prompts quietly. "Let's go."

Gunner's feet drag and he stops in front of Hope, not willing to look her in the eye. "I guess Reese was right... not only did I waste my time, but I'm to weak to accept the truth when I finally find it."

Con's heart aches for his friend, and he only wished there was something he could do. But the only thing they could do now was head to Northside where hopefully, Gunner could get the help he needed.


Jason takes in Katie's kiss, feeling as if it were a breath of fresh air to his lungs. His emotions surge through him, free and finally released. It was peace, it was love, it was gratefulness.

Wrapping his arms tighter around her, he draws her even closer, letting the kiss linger. Leaning back until his head is on the mattress, he lets Katie lean on his chest, embracing her with the feelings he had been keeping from her.

Thanks for being you, too.

His eyes closed, his fingers raked through her soft hair.

Can we just stay in this moment forever?

He would if he could. It was these moments that he had learned should be cherished.

No one else

Looking across the bridge at Gunner Hope's heart thumps. She would of hoped Gunner was smarter than that but her own heart raced anyways. Fear is what she held right now, for a coworker, a human being and a friend. Though she was scaired Hope stayed as calm as she could.

"Gunner, I wont turn around and I wont leave. You think you cant trust me, well than I know I am doing my job right. I care, and thats why I am here and I do what I wanna do."

Walking across the road slowly Hope starts and than stops again not turning around but motioning for Gunner to follow.

"If you jump Gunner I will have to see something I really dont want too. Something that will haunt me for the rest of my life. I dont think you really want to put me through that do you?"

Hope takes a quick glance to Con hoping to relay her message to him. She wanted to try and get Gunner to back up on his own but if it didnt work she wanted Con close to grab him.

Entering the room and being pulled into Jason's lap Katie can feel the emotions increase being pulled from Jason and feeding her. Only making what she felt herself stronger as she nuzzled her face into his neck for a moment.

I miss you a lot too J. Thank you for the gift you have given back to me. If you even need a little break again, just ask me.

Receiving the kiss from Jason and the the flower the smile on Katie's face grew even more as her emotions seemed to overflow.

Thank you J for always just being you, and no one else.

Bringing the flower to her noise Katie gives it a sniff enjoying the sweet smell. Than lowering the flower Katie looks deep into the eyes she always got lost in. Finally leaning in her lips touch his with enough emotions to match with how much she really did miss him. Her one arm finding his back and the other his head.

Not scared

Reese's jaw tightens a little. He knew what Hope meant, and it wasn't good. "You know... some of my agents have been through a lot... look at Jason... Katie... Scott... we got Agency guys on our hands with problems... but this... I just don't know what to do anymore. Pretty soon I'm gonna be the one needing to talk to you."

He manages a wry grin for Hope. Heaving a deep sigh, he leans over the cubicle wall to pick up the phone. "Hey, Con? Yeah... at Gunner's cubicle now please."

Con is quick to join them, his eyes full of question. "What is it?"

"I need you to find Gunner and..." Reese looks to Hope for reassurance. "...and take him to the Northside Hospital."

"Northside?" Con isn't sure he heard correctly. "Isn't that-"

"Yeah." Reese nods. "And take Hope with you, please."

"Where is he?"

"I don't know. He took off just a couple minutes ago."

Con lifts an eyebrow. "How do I find him?"

"You're the tracker."

Con sighs. "Alright." He turns to Hope. "Sounds like I might need you. Come on, we'll take my truck."

It takes an hour, but together, they're finally able to track down Gunner. When they do, it only proves Reese's worry was not an overreaction. Con pulls his truck over onto the shoulder of the road, staring out across the bridge. "We better get over to him." He gives Hope a sidelong glance. "I don't know if he'll listen to me."

Gunner didn't know how long he'd been there, but the more he thought and the more he let his mind absorb his guilt, the longer he stayed. But now he was on the outside of the guardrail, looking down into the ravine. He had never before felt so empty.

"Gunner?"

He rolls his eyes as he hears Con's voice. Turning his head, he rolls his eyes again, seeing Hope. "Just in time for the show, guys." He stares back down again. "One, two, three go."

Con's heart skips a beat. "Gunner stop."

A grin forms on Gunner's lips. "If anybody should be scared, it should be me, and I'm not, so... you might wanna just get back to the office and file some paperwork or something. Oh yeah and, my job's opening so if there's any hotshots down at the station who want a job, they can have at it."

Con swallows hard, scared for his friend. He lowers his voice. "Hope... I don't know what to do."


Jeff nods to Katie. "I'm okay. I'll still be here when you get back."


Jason is waiting in the bunk, still sitting on the edge of the bed when Katie comes.
It's open, come on in.
Smiling at her, he gestures for her to come closer and pulls her onto her lap.
I've missed you, ya know that?
He plants a quick kiss on her lips.
And...
Reaching to the nightstand, he pulls out a long-stemmed red rose. He hands it to her, still holding her on his lap.
Thanks for still being here... being patient with me.

Emotions

Watching Gunner go again Hope couldn't help but feel defeated herself. She had failed to help Gunner when he needed it, and she felt at lost on what to do.

"Sometimes, in some cases a deeper action needs to be take to keep someone safe. Maybe with Gunner this is one of those times."

Hope turns and looks to Reese the worry in her eyes. She did care, and she only wished Gunner would be ok.

"He might need more help than I can offer, and it will be a long hard road but if he is somewhere safe and can get better its worth it."

Giving a stretch as she stood from the bed where she had been slumpt over Katie gets a full force of emotions. It wasnt like a blast, but there were alot and it was like water on thirst lips. How she had missed this feeling and it was so good to feel close to the one she loved again.

Morning J! Good to feel you again.

A smile forms on Katie's lips not even realizing it was there at first that it was there, but this feeling inside, She felt renewed, almost different as God's will fell into place.

Ok, I'll be right over. Give me about 10 min.

Looking down at Jeff Katie gives a smile as she leans in to give him a soft kiss.

"I am going to go see Jason quick this morning. Rick said he was going to be over in a few moments so you wont be alone for long. I promise I will be back soon too. ok?"

Walking away

Gunner's shoulders drop and he looks at Hope with an expression of disbelief. "I can't trust anybody, can I? So I get a little crazy and wander the streets in the rain, and all of a sudden I need more help. Great."

Turning around, he steps back into his cubicle to grab his keys and turn back around, glaring at Reese. "Give me back my gun."

Reese stands firm, feeling a little braver with Hope on his side. "No."

"Give it back!"

"No, Gunner."

"Fine. You know what? I quit. This isn't worth it anymore." Gunner spins on his heel to stalk to the exit. "Bridges make less of a mess anyway," he mutters.

Reese watches Gunner walk away, feeling helpless. He glances to Hope. "Do I just let him go? Last night I was with him an hour and he never said a word. He was just... sitting there. I finally just took his gun and left. Figured he'd be alright once I got a hold on that but..." He shakes his head, clearly scared by Gunners behavior. "...I'm worried about him."


Gunner burns rubber as he speeds from the parking lot. He didn't like feeling this way: out of control. He never lost his temper, and he'd just had a shouting match. It didn't feel good. Worse, he didn't like the deeper feeling he had... the one that he'd buried twelve years ago.

Heading across town, he hits the quieter side, bypassing the little shop where he frequented for floats. This time, he went further, passing by the intersection of the accident, and continuing on to the bridge outside of town. It was a long one, stretching over more rocks than water. Pulling off to the side, he gets out if his car, wandering slowly on foot until he was in the middle of the bridge. He stops and stares down over the guardrail, his thoughts wandering places they never should have been.


Jason rolls over in bed and finally opens his eyes. Yawning, he stretches. He felt... good after sleeping in. But something else felt different too. It almost takes him a minute before he realizes what it is. He felt... emotions again... a lot of them. A gentle smile creases his lips. It was strange, running on pure emotion again.
Morning, Hero.
He glances to his nightstand as he sits up and pulls on his jeans.
If you got a minute, stop by...I've got something for ya.

For your own good.

Entering TJY Hope gives a yawn. Her might had been a full one and sleep had not come easy. She hadnt heard anything about Gunner that not and though that was good it made her worried as well.

Rubbing her eyes Hope looks up quickly as she hears the loud voices and see Gunner and Reese. What on earth was going on and what was with the shouting.

Hope didnt have to wait long for the answer to her question as she hears her name and she drew closer to Gunner and Reese. Just looking back and forth between both men Hope felt stuck though she new she had to do what was right.

"Gunner, your not ok. I am doing this, we are doing this because we care. Take some time off, go on a trip, get some fresh air but don't bury yourself deeper."

Hope lets out a long sigh as she glances at Reese.

"If you cant do this for yourself your going to be worse off and someone else is gonna have to do it for you."

Fine

Reese's mind is foggy from already been in bed several hours, but he manages to clear his head enough to understand what Hope was saying. He would find out later why Gunner had been at her house in the first place.

"Alright... I'll have someone check on him. Thanks, Hope."

Hanging up, he sighs and rolls out of bed. He was awake now. He might as well be the one to go find out where Gunner was. His agent could be a pain sometimes, but the last thing Reese wanted was to see him hurt.


Jeff still smiles a little, his eyes still closed. "You look like both of us... You've got Pent the eyes but you've got your mother's smile."

Feeling more at peace now than when he'd awoken so suddenly, he squeezes Katie's hand. "Tomorrow... ask me more tomorrow."



The moon makes its way across the sky, and slowly, slowly the light of dawn begins to outshine the stars. Morning had come.


Jeff stirs and opens his eyes. Looking around the room, he sees Katie and tries to remember all that had happened. He felt like he'd been run over by a train. Every muscle hurt, even his toes. It was painful just to turn his head. But something was different. He didn't feel so... sick. He was just incredibly sore... and thirsty.

His voice is hoarse as if he's had a horrible cold. "Morning, sunshine."




"I don't need a leave of absence!" Gunner throws up his hands, ignoring the stares from others on the main floor. He stood outside his cubicle, involved in a heated argument with Reese. "I'm fine!"

"You're not fine! I told you to take a break. Go home, Gunner. You need time off."

"I do not!" Gunner's eyes were bloodshot, proving he had had no sleep the night before. But he had come to work anyway. "And give me back my gun."

"No." Reese shakes his head stubbornly. "As of now, you're on mandatory leave of absence. If you won't take care of yourself, somebody has to."

"I don't need you trying to babysit me!" Gunner spots Hope just coming in to work and his stomach churns, remembering the evening before. He'd been foolish. "Hope! Tell Reese I'm fine so I can work!"

"You're not fine, Gunner!" Reese raises his voice to match. "You sitting at home in the dark with a loaded gun in your hand is not fine!" He'd spent an hour in silence at Gunner's last night before being able to leave, taking his agent's handgun with him.

"I was cleaning it!"

"In the dark?! I'm not stupid! Don't do this to yourself."

Gunner's eyes narrow, showing an unusual display of anger, a contradiction to his normally cool disposition. "Maybe if you hadn't come you wouldn't have to put up with me anymore."

"Don't talk like that," Reese retorts. "You're just going through a hard time is all."

"I'm fine!" Gunner repeats again. He looks over to Hope once more. "Please tell him I'm fine!"

late call

"I still want to help you Gunner, because I know what your going through is not easy...I.."

Hope's words trail off as she see that Gunner was leaving. There was nothing she could do and she couldnt force him to stay.

Once he was gone though she went to her desk and pulls out Reese number before punching it into her phone and waiting. She felt bad calling so late but it was for a good reason. Hearing the groggy voice on the other end Hope cringes knowing she woke up him.

"Reese, its Hope. I am sorry to call so late but..well Gunner just left here. He's not in good shape right now and I think someone needs to look after him."

Hope takes in a deep breath before she continues. She new she was talking fast but there really was no time to wast.

"I just think it would be best for someone to look out for him right now. I am not sure how because I didnt get a chanse to ask but he found out that he was the cause for his parents death. I think he said something about an argument. He's just not good right now. I tryed to get him to stay here but he wouldnt and he just left."

Sidearm

Gunner pauses a moment and finally looks to Hope's eyes. "Why do I feel like I'm being treated like a little kid?" He knew that wasn't her intent and that he was overly sensitive, but he felt it anyway.

He shakes his head a little and stands up, his clothes creaking from the soaked state they were still in. "I shoudln't... I mean... I should just... go."

Turning around, he aims for the door. His jacket riding up as he turns, his sidearm is revealed.

"Forget it, Hope... you were right... so was Reese. I've been a fool. It's time I admitted it."

Mistake

Giving a little jump herself from Gunner's sudden movement Hope eyes him not being able but feel bad for him. This hard to be hard, and so many things were running through his mind, it worried her to let him alone.

Bending down next to Gunner Hope trys to smile a little as she takes his hands and stops them from whipping.

"Gunner, its ok it was an accident. Come, sit down, you don't have to be in a hurry to go. Its actully nice to have some company."

Hope new it was late but if she could keep Gunner around for a little while longer at least to calm him down a little.

Still holding Jeff's hand Katie listens intently about the woman she would call mother but never would get to meet.

"She sounded wonderful. Do I look like her? or more like you?"

Katie lets out a sigh knowing she was asking so many questions. She should let Jeff rest he needed it.

"I wish I could have known her. Maybe Dad, when your feeling better you could tell me more."

Shouldn't have

"I deserve a fate worse than this." Gunner continues to look down, seeming to withdraw slightly. He was cold, and had never felt such misery. It was even worse than when he had discovered he had lost all memory of his life.

At the mention of Hope giving him dry clothes, he stands up abruptly, the towel dropping onto the chair. "I shouldn't have come," he mumbles. Turning too quickly, his hand catches the cup of tea, sending it sprawling across the table and onto the floor, making a mess.

He gives a little jump, heat rising to his face, even though he was still cold. "I'm sorry."

Kneeling down to try and mop up some of the tea with a napkin, his eyes suddenly burn. Just like the tea was splattered across the floor, he felt his life had been driven into a thousand directions, a mess he felt no one could clean up. His breath catches in his throat, helplessness driving the motion of his hands. But even when there is no puddle of tea left, he still wipes the floor.


Jeff manages a light chuckle and he squeezes Katie's hand, his eyes falling shut again. "She was... like you. Her eyes were gray blue like a moonlit pond... her heart was as big as the sun."

His voice is weak and hoarse, but he continues anyway. "She loved life... and loved me, though I never knew why. She loved roses and dreamed of a house in the country where... where she could plant rows and rows of bushes."

A tear escapes his closed eye and falls to the pillow. "She couldn't wait to hold you."

My Mom

"Take a jump from that bridge and you will face a fate worse than whats your dealing with now. There is no mercy for those who take there life playing God for the day. Accidents happen, horrable as it was, it was still an accident and you never meant for what happened to happen. For that reason you have been shown mercy already even if you don't feel like you should have it."

Hope takes a sip of her tea as she thinks for a long moment not really saying anything. She could never imagine how Gunner felt.

"You want to talk about it? Sometimes that helps! I wasnt really tired anyways. I think I might even have some mens clothing that might fit you and I can dry those."

Holding Jeff's hand Katie gives a small smile even if it couldnt be seen in the dark. Her Dad was going to be ok he really was.

"Yes, your ok again. Rick found out what happened, and found a cure."

Giving Jeff's hand a gentil squeeze Katie is silent for a moment.

"Dad, what....what was my mom like? If..if you wanna talk about this later we can I just thinking a lot about it."

Tomorrow instead

Gunner accepts the towel numbly, remaining quiet, even as he's ushered into the kitchen. Sitting down, he just stares at the table for the longest time. He focuses on the cup of tea, his hair dripping down onto the table, creating mini puddles that reflect the kitchen light. He didn't even seem to hear Hope speaking.

Still shivering a little, he gradually dries his face a little with the towel and wraps his hands around the teacup to warm his palms. He stares down into the liquid, completely lost in another world.

He still refuses to look up and meet Hope's gaze. Though finally, he takes a small sip of tea, but withdraws quickly as it's still too hot. "I could burn my mouth a thousand times and still have a debt to pay. I've sought my past for over half my life. And all to come to the truth... that the ghost has been me all along. A murderer hidden behind the mirror." He didn't want to speak of it, but somehow it felt as if he had to. "It was my fault...an accident 'cause of an argument I can't even remember. But it was my fault."

Gunner grits his teeth against his feelings. He understood Hope's analogy, but his depression was too deep to apply it. "At least if I'da found a real bridge, I could have jumped." He braves another sip of tea. "Maybe that's for tomorrow instead."


Jeff slides his hand from under the blanket to find Katie's hand. "I just... thought I was alone. I felt... but I didn't feet. It's not right... but... it is."

He licks his dry lips. "I don't understand... am I okay again?"

Differnt

And though night had come many people's minds were far from rest. The findings and events from the day weaghed heavy, leaving some to wonder what would happen next.

In a jeep parked outside a small light was on, the figured that had slept there many times before becoming use to it. But tonight sleep was far from her mind as Alice's paper layed in her lap and her hands folded on top.

"Lord, if this is the path you want Kyle to take give him the courage, and strength to do so. He has so much going for him that he cant even see. Just show him the path a little more clearly."

More prayers went up as the time dragged on. But as the minutes ticked Alice didn't mind. Her quiet time was always nice and helped her stay at peace.

Sitting in a chair across the quiet room Katie nods in and out of sleep. Her nerves were shot, her emotions ran wild with so many thing but now as they started to calm sleep was sinking in, and Katie was exhausted. Jason was sure to be fast asleep by now a few bunks down and just knowing he was near helped her be even more at peace.

Thinking her hears her name Katie sits up a little straighter just waiting wondering if she would hear it again or if it was just her mind from her groggy state. Hearing it again and knowing it was Jeff's Katie stands making her way over to his bed sitting down once more on the edge.

"I'm here Dad, are you ok?"

Sitting in the living room her cup of tea almost gone and Hope could feel herself starting to get a little sleepy. Standing to go into the kitchen Hope hears the door and stops. Looking at the wall clock she takes note to the time. It was late and she was a bit hesitant to answer the door but people never came to her house this late it could be an emergency.

Opening the door and seeing Gunner standing there Hope is taking back for a moment but recovers quickly. Hearing his words and seeing the look in his eyes Hope new, it was not time.

"Gunner, come in come in out of the cold before you catch a chill."

Ushering him into the house Hope directs him to the kitchen where she sits him down before disappearing and than coming back with a towel to wrap around him and he could use to dry himself off a little.

Going to the stove where the tea pot was still hot she makes up a cup of tea for Gunner, and than another for herself bringing it to him and giving a smile.

"Drink this so you dont get sick."

Taking her own cup in hand Hope goes back to the table and sits down as well. She wanted to ask what was wrong but she would wait for a moment.

"You know that makes sence. Sometimes people say I am a bridge. Bring them from one place, to the next. Its just a differnt aspect."

Bridge

Kyle swallows hard and reaches over, taking Hope's hand in his. He looks into her eyes, emotion filling his own. "I... I don't know if I can do this. But... you're right. Prayer's the only way I'll ever know what I'm supposed to do. I just wish I knew what God wanted from me."

He sighs, but gives her hand a squeeze. "I don't know what I'd do without my shadow." A little grin surfaces. "I feel like that cartoon of Peter Pan where he wants to stick his shadow back on... except I don't need to... 'cause you're always here."

He can't help the love that shone in his gaze. "Thank you."


"Yeah, yeah...." Gunner waves Hope off. "You want to help alright," he mumbles as she walks away. "You and Reese."

Looking back to his computer, he tries to concentrate, but its very hard. All he can see is that red truck. All he can hear are the sounds from his nightmare. For one of the first times, he felt on the verge of being out of control, and he didn't even really know why.


Rick nods and moves from the small table to the bedside instead. "Yeah... let me see how he's doing."

"Be nice if... y'all... talked as if I were here," Jeff mutters weakly.

Rick chuckles. "Your sense of humor is in tact. That's a good thing."

The exam is brief and Rick suggests that Jeff be left alone to rest for a while. For now, he was stable. All they could do was wait. Hooked up to an iv, it doesn't take Jeff long to fall asleep, this time peacefully. He doesn't even wake when others come and go later on to check on him, or to spend the night in the small room...


"K...Katie?" Jeff mumbles groggily, trying to get his eyes to focus in the dark bunkhouse. He knew it was sometime in the middle of the night, but didn't know the hour. "Katie?" he asks a little louder. Though feeling physically alright for the circumstances, mentally, he felt dizzy. Nothing seemed quite real. His emotions felt... strange. "Katie are... are you still here?"


Gunner sits bolt upright in bed, sweat pouring down the sides of his face. His own scream shatters the silence in his apartment. Covering his face with his hands, he rocks back and forth, trying to rid his mind of the horrific images.

It had been his nightmare again... but this time, for the first time in over twelve years, he had seen more - much more. He'd seen his parents' faces... he had heard their voices. And he had heard his own voice, arguing with his father. They'd been driving down the dark road, the streetlights flashing in the windows. Voices had gotten louder and louder. Gunner had been dead set on whatever his point was, and he hadn't given up, even when his mother had tried to stop the fight. One last word, one more smart remark, and Gunner's father had turned around in his seat to respond. The crash of glass and metal reverberated in Gunner's ears before everything went black.

"No!" Gunner's fist slams into his mattress. "No!" It couldn't be true. It couldn't be. No...his parents couldn't have died because of him... it wasn't possible. He'd spent all his life looking for the culprit... all his life...

He raises eyes to stare across the room and he sees himself in the mirror. A horror fills his veins like never before.

It had been him.


...It was hours later. A steady rain was pouring down, and thunder rumbled in the clouds. Gunner walks numbly up the path to the porch, soaked to the bone, cold and shivering as rain runs down his face. He had walked. He didn't even know how long it had taken him.

Once reaching the door, his finger hovers over the doorbell, but he stops, turning back around. Another turn makes him face the door again. Finally pushing the bell, his hand shakes from the cold. It was late... very late. He knew he was waking up Hope. But it just didn't seem to matter at this point.

When the door eventually opens, he stares at her, searching her eyes. He swallows hard, finding it very hard to overcome his pride.

"I... um..." He stops again, feeling heat in his face through the cold. "I went looking for a bridge."

He shrugs lamely. "I...don't know why I came here instead."

Pray

Hope gives a thoughtful moment of silence as she thinks about what Gunner had said. He had found something and from the looks of it, it might be something big. At least to him anyways it was and from his reaction if made her a little worryed.

"Its only lonely if you let it be. I'll be around still doing up some reports if you need me Gunner. I just want to be able to help."

Giving a smile and a little salute Hope turns and makes her way once again back to her makeshift desk. Along, out of place it was different but in a way she new how Gunner felt.

Giving a knowing nod Katie thought that maybe she had understood. Accepting death, knowing it was going to happen, being so close and than being pulled back it was a feeling that was unlike anyother.

"I...I think I know how you feel bad. I've been there, and its a confusing feeling. But I am happy that I get more time with you too. "

Looking to Jason and giving a smile Katie's face lights up, and than she looks to Rick shifting just a little.

"You need to check him over and make sure everything is ok?"

Sitting with Kyle Alice was in the middle on a small chuckle. The air as of the last few days had been thick as designations were being made, goodbyes were said and home looked to be around the corner. She new Kyle wasnt ready, but there really was no where else to go from here. Though she would just about follow him anywhere.

Opening her mouth to say something Alice closes it again as the gentlemen walks over to the table looking for Kyle. Just looking up at the man and gives a smile Alice exstends her hand to return the handshake.

Just listing to what Erik had to say Alice was a bit surprised. Not by what he thought of Kyle or that he read her magazine but that he had been there that day and had herd Kyle playing. Alice new Kyle more than likly was feeling a bit awkward with this whole thing and she couldn't help but understand why.

Giving a nod to Kyle and a small smile to let him know she was here Alice was silent as she just let the two men talk with holding her comments for now. She would wait till Erik was gone before she sheared what she though.

Finally watching Erik walk away Alice was silent for a moment as she let Kyle's question linger. But than turning to him again Alice gives a thoughtful nod.

"I believe you were just given an offer that wont lead you home yet."

Alice's eyes sparkled with excitement for Kyle. God always had a reason and maybe, just maybe this WAS his way of leading Kyle home.

"Pray about it Kyle. If this is what God wants than you CAN do it. You passion is music still I know it. I can see it in your eye Kyle. Never say never or you cant to God. Pray, and I will pray for you too. No matter what your shadow will still follow you."

Lonely path

Gunner looks up as Hope approaches, but immediately breaks contact as he chews the life out of his gum. "Yeah, actually... yeah. It was the truck alright."

His leg bounces without him realizing it. "Got some, um... more searching to do... the truck passed through several hands before landing at the junkyard, so... yeah."

He glances back up then down again, swiveling his chair. His fingers curl around the folded piece of paper that Hope and printed for him earlier about the truck. He doesn't seem to notice the bead of sweat that runs down his neck. "Um... so guess I'll be staying late after work to research this some more. Better than hanging out on the roof I guess, though either path is a lonely one."


"Wha..." Jeff lightly holds Katie's hand, though even that seems to take too much strength. "I don't... understand." He blinks, attempting a deep breath. "I... I feel... strange."

"How do you mean?" Rick asks.

"Like... sad... and happy...I think... at the same time." He tries to focus on Katie's eyes. "But... it's worth it if I get more time with you."


Kyle sits in the hospital cafeteria, staring down into the half-empty glass of apple juice. He was starting to feel better today - physically. The bruises on his face were starting to fade a little, and his wound was less sore. The others seemed to be improving as well, though for some, it was just the beginning of a very long road.

Kyle's eyes drift towards the door. He'd been sitting with Hunter, Jordan and Alice, but the two men had just left. He glances to his side, trying his best at a smile. Today he needed to decide what he was going to do. He'd told Alice that he didn't feel ready to return home... but it was looking like it was his only option.

Just as he's about to say something, a stranger approaches. He's medium-height with sandy hair, looking to be somewhere in his late twenties. He comes up to the table slowly, dressed casually in jeans, t-shirt and denim jacket. He stops and cocks his head, hands in his pockets as his eyes roam from Alice to Kyle, his expression easy-going. "Kyle Mitts?"

Kyle quirks and eyebrow. He had no idea who this man was. "Yes?"

"May I have a seat?"

Kyle looks to Alice, and shrugs. "Um... sure. And you are...?"

"Erik Wiley." He extends his hand to Kyle, then Alice before sitting down.

Kyle is still a bit leery. "What can we do for you?"

Erik looks between them both. "You two...?"

"Alice is my girlfriend, yes. Was there something you wanted?"

"Yeah... You." Erik's mouth forms a gentle smile. "Look, I know what you and your group have just been through, and I'm sorry. I don't mean to barge in on you at a time like this."

"It's okay... but what do you want with me?"

"My friends and I were going to see the show the other night. Heard it was canceled, but I went for a looksee anyway..."

Kyle tenses a little. He'd thought he'd been alone with Alice, and he didn't appreciate knowing that someone else had seen his emotional display. "You were there?"

Erik nods. "I was. And... I heard you."

Kyle sits back in his chair and shakes his head, putting up a wall. "Look I don't know what you want, but so far I'm not liking it too well."

"You used to be with JetStream, didn't you?"

"How do you know that?"

Erik reaches around into his back pocket and pulls out a magazine, letting it fall on the table. It was What's Up? He nods to Alice with a grin. "I read too." Leaning forward, he sighs. "Look, Kyle, I don't know why you left JetStream or what you're planning on doing now. All I know is that you can sing... and you can really sing. I got three other guys and a girl willing to back up someone like you, and we already got a guy offering a contract if we can give him a good enough sound."

Kyle blinks. Was this really what he was hearing? He looks at Alice, then back to Erik. "What are you saying?"

"I'm saying come try out."

"Why me? You wouldn't have gotten this far without a singer already."

Erik shrugs. "It was my older brother. He chose marriage over the stage. Can't blame him, but the band's in a lurch and I been praying about it, and I think you're our answer."

Kyle feels a jump in his heart and his pulse quickens. Every fiber in his being screamed at him to find out more... to take this chance... this could be it. But he was still reluctant. "I...I don't know. I mean... I quit the stage. And I don't know you or what kind of music you play or anything."

"Well I'm not asking you to sign on right this second." Erik chuckles. "Just come see us... find out more. Here." He pulls a pen out of his pocket and scribbles down a phone number and address on a napkin. "Call, or show up, or whatever."

"Why me? Why do you trust me like this?"

"I like JetStream," Erik admits. "I like Break Out. You wouldn't be involved in those things if you weren't a decent guy." Standing up, he nods to them both again. "If I haven't heard from you in three days, we'll look elsewhere."

As Kyle is left alone with Alice once again, he just stares at her and blinks. "What... just happened? I can't do this."

Use

Sitting on the ground with her back leaning aganst the bed Katie keeps her head in her hands. The stress she was under as she waited was nothing like what Jeff was going through but waiting and wondering was one of the hardest things to do.

Feeling the bed move and looking over her shoulder Katie can see Jeff's eyes are partly over. Quickly getting up and moving from the ground to the edge of the bed Katie takes Jeff's hand in her own.

"No, No your not dead, your very much alive infect."

Smiling down at Jeff Katie cant help the joy she felt. He wasn't dead, life was going to go on and now it was a whole new chapter to learn about a past and a father she had never known.

"Rick saved your life Dad. Your going to be ok now."

Hearing some noise a few cubicles down Hope stands a little and looks up over the wall. Seeing Gunner return she picked up on his odd behavior. Had his time out turned bad? Had he found anything with the lead she gave him?

Standing Hope makes her way over to him a little conserned taking note to his aggravation. Giving a light tap on the wall Hope leans on it eyeing Gunner.

"Did you find anything of use?"

Upset?

Jason nods a little to Katie, giving her back a light rub. "I'm glad I'm here."

The struggle continues for longer than Rick had predicted. Jeff is in torture, exhausted, but unable to sleep through the waves of pain and the delirium. Fever comes and goes, and so do persistent bouts of stomach problems.

Finally though... finally, finally, the bunkhouse becomes more quiet. Rick is slouched in a chair, feeling drained. Jason is pacing near the door. And Jeff is finally lying still in bed, his breathing shallow but steady. Drifting in and out of consciousness, his eyes flutter open about halfway. Everything was a big blur, fuzzy and spinning.

Licking his dry lips, he thinks he can still see Katie. "Guess I'm not... dead yet... huh?" He squints his eyes, trying to focus. "K... Katie? What... what's going on?"


Gunner's eyes narrow slightly in quiet amusement, and he just shakes his head as Hope walks away. Going for the phone, he dials Susanne's office. "Yeah... I'm gonna be out for a few minutes... my computer's running data. Yeah, thanks."

Hanging up, he grabs his keys and heads to the exit with the printout from Hope. He didn't waste time with these things, even though he would play it cool if approached.

Time flies when you're having fun... and sometimes even when you're not.

It's been an hour and a half, and the door to TJY opens once again. Gunner heads back towards his cubicle, his walk slightly agitated. Tossing a new piece of gum in his mouth, he flops into his chair to glare at his computer that's still processing. Opening a desk drawer, it slams shut again after he's retrieved a notepad that's half full of handwritten notes and charts and more notes. He starts scribbling more information, totally engrossed and not paying attention to whatever work he's actually supposed to be doing while at TJY.