Instead of fading...

Carson stares into Misty's tear-filled eyes, his ears receiving the words that he had dreaded. But he knew them to be true. How could it be so impossible to have a friendship between two people who had cared so much? It just wasn't fair. And once again, Carson was reminded that this was his fault... this whole thing was on his hands.

The flame had died, and rekindling anything was just not going to work. He'd known it was over, but now... not even being able to sit and talk... it was more than he could stand here knowing.

Carson's eyes drop, his whole body sinking slightly. "Alright. I won't bother you anymore." He dares to glance up one more time, a faint grin surfacing. "I guess I'll see you around then." He opens his mouth to say more, but it's no use. It didn't matter.

Turning around, he hits the door before Misty, exiting into the hall. Pausing briefly to take a deep breath, he glances down to Angelica's office. No... he couldn't do this. Not today... not now. He couldn't stay here any longer.

Feeling the emotions pooling hot behind his eyes, Carson turns the other way, back out the way he'd come. It had been a mistake to come... he shouldn't anymore.

Heading out across the main floor, he accidentally brushes past Laura too quickly, bumping her elbow and sending her papers flying.

Laura gives a little cry and tries to grasp at her stack of files, but most slide off onto the floor.

Carson's face grows hot and he kneels down to help pick things up. "I'm sorry," he mumbles. "My fault."

"No, no, I wasn't watching where I was going." Laura rolls her eyes at herself. Glancing up, she catches Carson's eye, and sees the redness there. Suddenly she senses something is not right. "You okay?"

Carson swallows hard and has to look away as he stands back up again. "I...no..yes... I'm fine."

"You sure?" Laura puts as hand on Carson's arm, concerned. She didn't interact with him all that much, especially now since he wasn't at TJY much, but she'd never seen him with quite this look on his face before.

"Yeah." Carson's voice almost cracks. "Sorry again. I'll see ya."

Laura watches helplessly as he walks to the exit. "Okay..." Gathering the rest of the papers, she looks to the exit again as the door closes, and she shrugs. It was none of her business.


Scott watches the brief exchange between Carson and Misty, his heart going out to them. Focusing on something other than himself for the moment gave him a needed distraction, though he wished it wasn't something as emotionally painful as this.

Seeing Carson walk away, and seeing Misty's tears, Scott gives a deep sigh. Still lying down, but alert now, he shakes his head a little. "Why don't you just love him?" he asks quietly. "It'll only eat you up inside if you deny it."

A small pain hits his own heart. He knew this all too well. He'd tried to make a future with someone who had loved another... and their love simply couldn't be snuffed out. He had settled on that, and he was okay with it. But he knew that no matter what he ever could have done, Katie's love for Jason would have always been in the forefront.

"Are you being fair?" he asks softly.


Carson stuffs his hands in his jacket pockets and heads across the parking lot to the sidewalk and down away from TJY. A bitter wind stung his face and he swipes his eyes with the back of his hand, blaming the cold air for the salty moisture.

Trudging along the sidewalk, he kicks an empty can with force, sending it into an alley. Normally he'd pick it up and recycle it, but today he wasn't in the mood. He'd been a fool today... He'd made a complete idiot of himself. Why did he have to go and do the things he did? Why couldn't he have just said hi to Misty and left it at that? He'd talked to her since they'd broken up, and though awkward, it had never been like this. Why had he pushed things too far this time?

He knew good and well why. Because the more time he spent away from Misty, the more he missed her. Instead of getting over her like he should, the longing to be with her only grew stronger. Instead of the desire to see her fading like it should, it only increased. He didn't jog by her house two mornings because he liked the scenery...he did it with the hope of just being able to wave a greeting to her... just being able to see her once more.

Who was he fooling? It was over. How long would it take for him to realize that? How long would it take for him to accept it? He just missed her so much... He missed seeing her... he missed her smile... he missed talking with her... he missed laughing with her... he missed just hanging out with her. More than the romance, he missed her friendship. But just as the romance had died, the friendship had gone right along with it.

Reaching the back of Mom and Pop's, Carson has to stop once more to take a deep breath. He had to refocus. He couldn't let his mind be stuck on Misty all day. He had work to do, and Jess was coming for lunch.

Jess... Carson leans against the building, a sickening feeling in the pit of his stomach. He cared about her... He didn't want to hurt her... He enjoyed her company... So why was he still feeling pain about Misty? He needed to move on... he needed to finally let go and move on. And Jess was there...waiting...putting up with him, even as he fumbled along.

Finally Carson lets himself inside and heads to his room where he sheds his jacket. Trying to clean up a little, he then aims for the kitchen where he could hear Herb already hard at work. Entering and grabbing an apron, Carson bravely looks to his employer and friend. "The hardware store can have a new window by tomorrow," he informs quietly. "And...they said they'd work with me on payments so... I'll be taking care of it."

Feelings

*As Carson reaches out and touches Misty her heart skips a beat as the warmth from his skin can be felt on her shoulder. Than as Carson's hand movies to her face Misty can't help but close her eyes and lean hear head into his hand slightly as she gets lost in a million emotions. His skin aganst her felt so good, a feeling she had missed.

Slowly opening her eyes again Misty's are glossy with more tears that wanted to come, the feelings had come, the feeling had gone and it killed Misty inside knowing she could hug him, knowing she couldnt kiss him. In a low horse voice Misty makes her reply.*

"I wan't to be friends Carson. More than anything I want to be, but I don't think I can. I still have to many feelings, I still....want things like they were when I look at you. I don't think I could ever be just friends with out wanting more and I don't know if that will ever go away or not."

Phonecall

As Misty starts to pass Carson, he sees the tear in her eye. It hurt worse than a knife to his heart, and he can't break his stare. He had come here to fix one mess on the road to many fixes. How could he let this chance slip by?

Before Misty can leave, Carson steps away from Scott's bed, and lays a hand on Misty's shoulder, stopping her. Turning her so she is forced to face him, his heart skips a beat. How long it had been since he had touched her.

Swallowing hard and pushing these feelings aside, he reaches up to gently brush the tear from her face before withdrawing his hand.

"Misty..." His voice is low, almost begging. "Can't we be friends?"


Bret's eyes fly open as he hears the phone ring, and he groans, pulling the covers up over his head. When he realizes it's Charlotte's voice that comes through the answering machine though, he exposes his head again to listen to the message. A smile creeps onto his lips and he speaks, even though she's hung up. "I love you too."

Sighing, he glances at the clock. He really did need to get up. But with three attempts at getting winter jobs and being turned down, it was yet another morning that it really didn't matter what time it was.

Falling back to sleep, it isn't long before he's awake again at the sound of a car horn, and he rolls his eyes. It was no use.

Rolling out of bed, he finally gets up to shower and put clean clothes on, shuffling downstairs to make some coffee. Grabbing the cordless phone he looks at a handwritten list of numbers by the kitchen counter and dials absentmindely as he makes the coffee.

Putting the receiver to his ear and getting a female voice, he rolls his eyes at himself. "Ohhh, Jamie, I'm sorry. This is Bret. I meant to dial Con."

Bret reaches for the can of coffee in the cupboard but it slips from his grasp, bouncing off the counter and onto the floor. The lid hits a cupboard door handle on its way and as if it couldn't have been planned better, coffee goes everywhere.

Staring at the mess wide-eyed, Bret blinks, almost forgetting his phonecall. "I, um...uh...." He gropes for something to try to clean up the mess by pulling off some papertowels, but they won't tear and he winds up with a mile of sheets, still not any closer to getting anything clean, other than what the bottom of his socks have picked up off the tile floor.

"Uhhh...." He tries to collect his thoughts. "Caves... yes... Charlotte has extra tickets and wondered if you and the Tank wanted to check it out. It's getting cold, but I guess they're still doing business."

So early

*Misty head snaps back up once again as Carson calls her by her nickname. How long had it been since she had been called that name. The name she had grown to love and look forward to hearing. A unexspected pain hits Misty's heart as she trys her best to hold back the tears that wanted to come. She was deturmened not to let them show. Would she ever be ok to be around Carson, would she ever be able to be around him and not flinch.*

"I'm hanging in there. Had some long work hours as of late but I don't mind to much."

*Fiddaling around with a few more things on the counter Misty trys her best to stay at ease but it was hard. Carson's voice alone caused her to melt, just his name sent her heart fluttering for something she could no longer have. No, she belonged to someone alse now and what she and Carson had was lost.

Moving away from the counter Misty trys to her to hold her voice steady. She count stand here any longer and she couldnt turn her back on Carson but she had to leave.*

"Excuse me, I have to get back to work. It was good seeing you Carson. Scott if you need anything you know where I am."

*Moving twords the doorway Misty slides past Carson her eyes locking with his one last time as a tear makes itself known once she gets a wiff of his colone.*

"..Hey Hun sorry I am calling so early I dont mean to wake you if I have already. I was just calling because I got some free tickets for the caves, the company is just trying to get rid of them before winter so they dont have to clame taxes on them. So I didnt know if maybe you wanted to go with me one night and than you can ask Con and Jamie. I know they have a few other friends I have met once or twice and maybe they would like to go as well. It might be fun to get to know some people a little better. Anyways thats up to you. I better get going back to work before I get into trouble. I love ya Hun and see you for lunch."

*Charlotte hangs up the phone with a smile on her face. Since her and Bret's elopment it had never left her face. Though some things had been hard and problems stood in the way she could never be happyer. Bret was perfect the man of her dreams, her light at the end of the path and she could ask for nothing more.

Sticking her phone back in her pocket Charlotte turns and goes back behind the little ticket booth to help more waiting customers.*

Sassy

Scott can't help but lift an eyebrow at Misty's comment of his importance. He certainly didn't feel he was that important to TJY at the moment. They had someone to replace him, and all he was doing was lying in bed. But...Misty's care did provide some comfort, and he couldn't deny that.

Carson fixes his gaze on Misty as she talks, his shoulders relaxing a little. He'd talked to her on and off, but never for long, and he was always afraid she'd just turn around and walk away.

Somewhat of a grin comes to his mouth and he shakes his head at her question. "Not great at the moment. You know me though...always in some kind of trouble." Though meant as a joke, there was too much truth to it to completely hide the lack of humor in his eyes. "You look good yourself, Sassy."

The nickname slipped out before he could stop it, and he bites his tongue, lowering his gaze. "I, um..." He fishes for something to say, but for once, comes up empty-handed. Looking back up at Misty, his eyes roam her own, searching for something...for closure. But it wasn't there. There was no closure for him. Would there ever be?

Scott glances up between the two, not feeling uncomfortable, but feeling just a little sorry for the two of them. He knew the past, and it was obvious that not much had changed in the last two months.

Anything less

*Misty's head shoots up as she hears that voice she had hurd so many times before and the hair on the back of her neck stands up as she turns around. Misty's eyes lock with Carson's for a long moment her mind moving, memories forming the same ones she had been trying to keep at bay. Those were the past, they could never be again and they needed to stay away before they betrated her. Breaking her gaze Misty fiddles around with a few things on the counter.*

"I do what I can to keep Scott comfortable. I only hope its helping.He's to important to TJY to give him anything less."

*A long moment of silence pass again before Misty looks up once more. Giving Carson a once over he looks like he was doing well.*

"You look like your doing good. Hows everything at mom and pop's?"

That I am

Jason stops as Katie does, looking down at her as she talks. Taking in her words, he just looks down into her eyes, studying them for the longest time. Not saying anything...not sharing any unspoken words.... Just looking at her.

Feeling the warmth of her hand against his face and her fingers running through his hair, he finally releases some of his emotions.

You know you drive me crazy when you do that.

"Quit apologizing, Katie," he answers quietly. His arms wrap around her and pull her close to him. The chilly wind was cold on their skin, but it didn't matter. "If anybody should be grateful for a second chance, it's me."

A fleeting thought passes through his mind, betraying him once more. But only one word is formed, slipping through the cracks, the host unaware.

Family.

"I couldn't live without you." Only after he's said it, does a soft laugh come out. "Literally."

Jason cocks his head to bend down and give Katie a tender kiss on her lips, lingering only for a moment. "Come on. You're keeping me plenty warm, but eventually it's going to get cold out here."


Carson sighs deeply and gives a shrug of surrender. "I guess...I can't argue with you."

Giving Jess' back a short rub, he moves to stand up. "I'm sorry our date got ruined again. I need to get some shut eye before the morning or it'll just make things worse."

Getting to his feet, he pulls Jess up too, drawing her close for a goodnight kiss. "Drive home safe and I'll talk to you sometime tomorrow. Thanks...for all your help tonight."


Scott knows that Misty has more on her mind than she says, but he doesn't push. He was too tired to try and figure it out anyway, though a part of him wanted to remember this conversation for later when he felt more up to it.

His eyes start to drift shut, though he fights it.

"Misty..." His voice is barely audible. "Keep the monsters away?"

Giving up, his eyes finally close as sleep has its way.


And the moon watches over the night, casting light through the darkness. For some the darkness lies in the shadows of the evening air. For others, the darkness lies within themselves as they battle with their own minds and hearts.

But as the moon slowly bids farewell to the black sky, so the sun appears, bringing a new day....a new start...new chances.


Seven o'clock. A note is taped to the kitchen door at Mom and Pop's in Carson's handwriting.

Herb -
You probably already noticed the front window. It's my fault. I'm sorry. I'm gone this morning to the hardware store to see about a replacement. I also have to make another quick stop to try and fix something else. I will be in a soon as I can, and I will work late to make up my time. I'll explain more later...it will be the truth.
-Carson


Scott's eyes flutter open and he stares up at the ceiling, taking a moment to figure out again where he was. He was tired, and the dark circles under his eyes proved it had not been an easy night. He was glad the morning was here... but he was still exhausted. Rolling over onto his side, he curls up again, as if trying to block out the world. Rick would be here soon enough, and he'd get told what to do and what not to do today. Scott's mind was in a fog, and he wasn't quite sure he was even really awake yet.


Jason makes his way across the TJY floor, heading straight for his office. He was only a few minutes late, but it was enough to throw him off. Passing Laura, he waves, and going by Nate, he throws him a nod. "Mornin' Nate."

Making it to his office, he flops down in his chair and flips on the computer, making a mental note to go see Scott again today too.

But all plans seem to fly out the window as he sees a handwritten note on his desk.

Austin is arriving tonight. Thought you'd want to know.
-Reese

Jason lets out a sigh and crumples up the paper to throw it in the trash, negative emotions flaring up again. Trying to get a lid on them, he attempts concentrating on the work he was suppose to start, but it wasn't easy.


Carson takes a deep breath and opens up the door to TJY. Now that they were the Elite, security wasn't as tight, and he was glad of it.

He'd just come from the hardware store to fix that problem, now he was trying to fix another one. And maybe this one couldn't even be fixed, and he might get into trouble, but.... if he didn't start being a hundred percent honest and fixing the messes he was making, it would just get worse.

Walking across the main floor, Carson keeps his eyes down a little, not really sure how to feel about being here. He knew it wasn't as bad as it used to be, but it still felt a little awkward. He thought he knew were Angelica's office was and heads for it, mulling over what he was going to say. He didn't know her, but she was the only lawyer he knew of that he could at least get this close to without paying an arm and a leg. And he knew that she dealt with big cases, not small ones about dogs and who they belonged to, but she was the only one he could thing of to see. At least in a place like this, he knew he could trust her.

Heading down the hall, Carson passes by the infirmary and just happens to see the door is open. Not even realizing it, he glances in, and spots Scott in the bed. He'd heard he'd been found, and now felt a strange sense of gladness.

Stopping in the door and looking past Scott, he spots Misty next. His eyes linger on her a moment, words seeming to get lost in the expanse between them.

Scott senses someone else in the room and opens his eyes, his face to the door. Looking at Carson a moment, he blinks, then the corner of his mouth twitches a little. "Carson?"

Carson can't help his grin, and he enters the room, letting his gaze move from Misty to Scott. "Hey, Scott. Welcome back."

Scott gives a little nod. "Thanks...I think."

Carson approaches the bed, rare compassion filling his eyes. He saw the marks on Scott's face and arms and he knew...he knew what he'd been through. "Sorry, mate."

Scott swallows hard and looks down before glancing up again. "You know, don't you."

Carson's jaw tightens. "I do." He'd been there...he'd been on the other end though. He'd been the one to hit... he'd been the one to ration food... he'd been the one to torture... he'd been the one to give those shots. He knew... he recognized the Agency's work all too well. "I'm glad they found you."

"Me too." Scott gives a little nod.

Carson looks up, spying Misty again. His original goal to be at TJY was lost, and he clears his throat awkwardly. Glancing down again, he gives Scott a small smile. "Looks like you're in good hands."

Scott gives a forced, weak laugh. "That I am."

Thx

*Leaning aganst Carson Jess lets out a sigh mulling over what he said. Sometimes, she wish she could run away. Hide from the world.*

"Running isnt the answer Carson. Lord knows there are days when I wish I could just run away and never come back. But that wouldnt solve anything. You'd still be in the same position that you are now."

*Leting out a sigh again Jess sits up.*

"We all make mistakes Carson. Over and over again but whats imporant is learning from them I think. The hardest part is asking for forgivness, but its something we all learn in time. I think I am finally getting the hang of it...maybe."

*Katie can't help but giggle as she lets Jason finish eating. She new he was tired but was thankful that he would go for a walk with her anyways. There was just something about tonight that she didnt want to stay inside.

Standing Katie gives a strech and takes her jacket off the hook and heads out the door with Jason. Reaching out Katie takes Jason's hand in hers as they walk down the sidewalk and the moon shines bright lighting there way. Being silent for a long moment Katie finally speaks.*

"I know I dont say much J...."

* Katie cant help the grin the plays on her lips.

and even when I dont say it I know you can feel it but its not the same...*

"I really am happy with you, and yes the past is behind us but I'm sorry anyways."

*For a moment Katie stops and turns twords Jason running a hand to the side of his face and through his hair.*

"...Thanks gor giving me a second chanse. "

*Katie lets out a sigh and shakes her head. What that what she really wanted to say? Did that come out how she wanted? Did she just sound silly?*

*Misty looks up at Scott again quiet for a moment and than looks back down at her paper work. She never really talked about what was on her mind let alown let her thoughts linger to sitting on just one thing. Finally looking back up at Scott Misty gives a smile.*

"Alot of things on my mind I guess. It's not really one thing by itself, its more a mixture of alot of things. It will pass in time I am sure."

*Looking back down at her paper work Misty trys to hide her eyes that said there was more than what she was saying but what WAS she to say? How was she to express how she felt. It was just something that was always hard for her.*