Shadows Beauty

*As Carson withdraws from the kiss Jess stairs back. Scaning his face, searching the eyes that had captavated her. Seeing a bit of Carson's old spark in his eyes again makes Jess herself grin and her eyes sparkle for a moment showing the lost smile, and color they once had.

Giving a small shutter as a chill runs up her spine Jess closes her eyes feeling Carson's fingers run up her arm, neck and over her lips. His touch was rough but had a certin softness to her that gave her comfort.

Giving a small kiss to Carson's finger as it pass over her lips Jess rests her head on his chest as his arms wrap around her. Softly she replys.*

"I'm not disapointed. I like the real Carson."

*Wrapping her own arms around Carson the one behind his back and the other draped over him Jess just sits completely comfortable. Something about Carson made Jess feel ok, and didn't make her feel bad about herself. Maybe it was that Carson accepted her knowing the past and everything that happend.

Staying silent for a moment longer Jess just takes in the moment, the comfrote and the feeling that made her smile. This feeling was new, but she liked it. For once she felt real...worth more than a lowlife.

After several more moments Jess finally moves her head just a little looking up at Carson still resting her head on his chest she was able to see his face. Finally in a soft voice Jess asks.*

"So what do we do now? Anything. Something. So long as we don't so nothing. If we screw it up, we can start over. Try something else. If we wait until we've satisfied all the uncertainties, it may be too late. I'm glad I took the risk to let you see my shadows beauty."

Spark

Carson glances up at Jess as she pulls away and slips out of the booth. He’d almost think she was leaving, had her hand not stayed in his.

As she moves around to his side of the table, he slides over just a little, shifting his position to face her more.

His eyes meet hers again… no words need to be spoken. The acceptance in his gaze signals that he’ll allow the return, and he does. His palm turns against hers to lace his fingers in between her own as his other hand wraps around her waist, bringing her close.

Carson lets the exchange linger, in no hurry to end as he feels Jess’ own passion colliding with his own.

Slowly sliding back further to the wall, Carson leans back resting in the corner. Gently withdrawing from the kiss, he eyes Jess, a spark of the old boldness flashing in his stare, the confident air drifting over him as just the very corner of his mouth starts to upturn.

Letting go of her hand, he runs his fingers up her arm and neck to her face, his thumb gliding over her lips. Taking a deep breath, he settles back, lifting his feet to rest them on the opposite booth under the table.

He turns Jess slightly and pulls her close so her head is resting against his chest, his arm wrapped around her. “I guess you found the real Carson Banks,” he whispers softly.

Closer

*Feeling Carson's hand run through her hair and his other locking fingers with her own the feeling of acceptance washes over her.

Carson's kiss was like the taste of honey, the sweet taste that you couldn't get enough of. Jess had been so scared and nervous to even think of being close to anyone alse but Carson was different, feeling him so close to her she wasn't scared. She felt comfortable with him and confadent he wouldn't hurt her.

Jess hand stays lock with Carson's as she pulls away for a moment. Still holding his hand Jess slips out of her booth and comes around to the other side, sliding in with Carson.

Smiling again Jess reachs out turning Carson a little to face her and wrapping her free arm around him drawing him slightly closer to her. As she starts to lean in again she bites her bottom lip and searchs Carson's eyes for a moment before returning to continue the kiss. Keeping her arm on his back she gently rubs is and her other hand interlocked with his own leting the passion, the bliss, the pure sweetness continue.*

Logic

Carson can feel his pulse rate pick up as Jess brings her hand to his face. He doesn’t move, just letting the moment slip by like the second hand on a clock slowing down against the law of time.

Her words tantalize his ears and pull at his heart, daring him to open up…defying his will to stand firm against his retaliation of letting anyone close again.

His eyes roam between hers as they near, their gaze almost drawing him in to a state where nothing else around them seems to matter anymore.

As Jess presses her lips to his, then returns again, his eyes close, every fiber in his being pointing at the red flags in the back of his mind. And for several seconds, he doesn’t move, just allowing Jess to come…allowing her to kiss him.

But his actions don’t listen to his logic anymore. Drawn in too far by Jess’ action to resist, one hand reaches up to cradle her face, his rough palm almost becoming soft against her velvet-like skin.

Slowly he begins to return the kiss, gently, then more firmly, cocking his head as his fingers make their way to her hair. His other hand slides up to hers that’s against his face, taking it in his own to lock her fingers in his, feeling her slight tremble, his own pulse racing.

Beholder

*Jess can't help the smile that spreads across her face slowly. A smile that her face had lacked for a long while, as she felt a confidence she hadn't ever before. A strange feeling churns in her stomach and unexpected but good feeling.

As if time stops Jess only see Carson as everything alse around her fades away. And Jess almost feels her actions are not her own as she takes a chance with a quivering hand.*

"So we both have something alse in common than, but even the dreamless shadows confined to a darkness of there own mind have beauty in them."

*Jess brings a hand to the side of Carson's face as her thumb runs across his cheekbone as her finger still trembles slightly.*

"And disappointment is sometimes a risk the beholder is willing to take, but let them make that decision, don't make it for them."

*Jess voice almost drops off into a whisper, a soft tone that drifts through the air.*

"Who is the real Carson Banks? I'd like to take that risk and get to know him."

*Jess leans forward as her pulse starts to race. Her breathing quacking slightly, as her lips press to Carson's for a moment only to withdraw and than return in the other direction once again for more.*

Risks

Carson stares at Jess as she studies his eyes, his own studying right back. What was her angle… Why did she see those things…and were they real?

He blinks and drops his gaze, contemplating for a moment. Finally he straightens up so he’s facing forward in his seat, swinging his feet back down on the floor. Leaning his elbows on the table, he stares down into his own milkshake, still finding it too thick to suck through his straw.

“The one who can read my eyes can read my soul. And the one who reads my soul risks seeing who I really am.”

Letting his gaze drift back up, he realizes he’s only inches from Jess’s own eyes and he swallows hard, his voice’s tone lowering. “And those seeing who I really am risk disappointment. For I’m but a dreamless shadow of who they believed me to be.”

Endless

*Jess lets out a small sigh.*

"You know your capable of having dreams and achieving them just like me."

*Jess is quiet again as she plays with a strawberry that is stuck in the bottom of her glass trying to get it out.*

"I like just looking around and finding the good in anything. Like this strawberry."

*Jess pulls her legs underneath her and leans over the table getting a little bit closer to Carson and tilting her glass just a tad so he can see in the glass.*

"Look how it lays in the milkshake only a bit of it covered in pink while the rest of the red and green stick out. It seems, artistic to me."

*Jess looks up at Carson and gives a small nod. Her eyes proving she liked talking about this.

Searching Carson's eyes for a moment Jess finally talks again a different tone in her voice. One that she's she was deep in thought and was thinking about this before.*

"And take your eyes for instance as well, they are amazing Carson. They have a depth that lasts forever, they hold a certain sadness but yet there is light somewhere deep in them. There almost luring, as if they echo and call for someone. You have, nice eyes."

*Jess holds her gaze, just looking into the endless blue of Carson's eyes. To Jess they said so many things, they and they made her feel safe.*

Pieces

Carson's eyes narrow slightly, a small smile on his lips. "It's the special ones that can make dreams come true...and you're special enough to do it. Don't sell yourself short. You got a lot of life left."

Taking his straw, he tries to suck some more milkshake, but finds it difficult. Grimacing, he stirs it around. "I think I made this one too thick."

As Jess asks him what his own dreams are, he pauses, his eye on the table. Looking back up to her, and staring hat her eyes, he shakes his head. "A guy like me doesn't have dreams, Jess. All he has are broken pieces of a past he wishes was a dream."

Carson swirls around his straw in his glass, realizing the hypocritical attitude he had...he was encouraging Jess to dream, while at he same time eliminating himself from that equation. Sighing a little, he shakes his head again. "I guess I wouldn't know what to dream for anyway...all I've ever done is live for today."

He tries to revert the topic back to Jess. "So...photography, huh? Nature? Animals? People?"


Bret is grateful that Charlotte doesn't press the issue, and enjoys her presence and the kiss she offers again. Standing up, he takes her by the shoulders and points her to the living room. "Dishes can wait. It's movie time, and I'd say tonight is a good drama night..."

He goes over to his rack of DVDs, finding one he wants, and pops it in the player. Flopping down on the couch, he hooks Charlotte with his feet to bring her down too, locking her between his legs so she can't go do the dishes.

Only a dream

*Sitting down across from Carson, Jess leans her arms across her on the table and takes a sip of her milkshake. A smile spreads across her face again. Carson did make good shakes and Jess tummy was churning more than she wanted to admit.

Jess sips her milkshake in throught for a moment after Carson asks his question. She had never been asked that question before though she had thought of the answer many times. Never would she think about telling anyone for fear they would laugh. Someone like her with hardly any money was not cut out for it.*

"I don't have dreams really, only wishful thinking. Most my dreams are dark and foggy. Though I have one I can see clearly. Though I, guess I never did put a great deal of thought into it. I do have a dream but thats where it ends. I always wanted to go to college for photography and math. I like them both."

*Jess leans her head back aganst the booth and closes her eyes for a moment. An image rolling through her mind as she speaks. Almost being able to smell the air and feel the wind.*

"Traviling, in a yellow lambergine, the wind in my hair out to some place nice snaping pictures."

*Opening her eyes again Jess is braught back to the real world.*

"But that, is only a dream. I could never see it coming true. How about you Killer? What do your dreams look like?"

*Charlotte smiles at Bret from across the table. She could tell something was bothering him but decied for now not to ask. If he needed someone to talk to he new she was here. It's not that she didn't care but she learned along time ago not to push someone.*

" You beter believe it. I want to spend at least some time with you on my days off. However tomarrow I might flip a coin on cleaning your house again. It needs it."

*Charlotte grins and thans stands starting to clear the table and putting the left over food away. Coming back over to Bret Charlotte bends out giving him another quick kiss before finishing clearing the table.*

"Well I picked dinner, you pick the movie hun while I wash up these dishes."

Dreams

Laughter twinkles in Carson's eyes. "Thank you."

He moves with Jess to pick up the fallen chairs and try to finish cleaning up. It doesn't take too much longer and the cleaning is finally completed. Carson takes a few minutes in the kitchen and the emerges with a strawberry milkshake in one hand, and a vanilla in the other.

Picking a booth, he slides in one side and sets Jess' milkshake down on the other. Sitting sideways with his feet up on the seat, he settles back against the wall and sighs deeply. Tonight had been a nice distraction. It had gotten his mind off of unpleasant topics, and given him something different to think about.

Carson takes a sip of his milkshake, enjoying the cool treat. "Alright, Jess...what's said in here stays in here.... so tell me... what do your dreams look like? No holds barred - anything possible. Where do you want to be in five years?"


Bret takes a sip of water and keeps his gaze down on his plate. "Just an old pal of mine, stopping by. Kind of a pain, actually..."

His voice trails off as a sudden flashback hits him. Maria had confronted him about his so-called friends, and what they'd been doing. He'd skirted around the issue then just like he was now. And that had only contributed to his divorce.

He brings himself back and swallows hard, suddenly his appetite lessening as he stirs his fork around his food. "So... day after tomorrow you want to do something?"

What happens

*Cringing as the chairs fall Jess gives a small jump as the last one falls. Standing sunted for a moment Jess brings her hand to her mouth and for a moment a spark of life is seen in her eyes as a laugh escaps her lips. She couldn't help but see the humor for the moment in what had happend. Turning to Carson she puts her free hand over her hart.*

"What happens, at Mom and Pop's tonight stays at Mom and Pop's tonight. You have my word."

*Jess shakes her head as she puts the rag and cleaner down on one of the booths and starts to help pick up the chairs and placing them on the table tops again.*

*Charlotte smiles back at Bret knowing good and well what he ment. Pushing off the counter she steps away from him walking backwards for a few moments with a grin on her face.*

"Dinner, sounds good. It should be done momentarly."

*Turning back around Charlotte starts to finish the dinner.*

"Hun can you set the table for me?"

*Stiring and tossing the smell of the stir fry drifts through the air and smells so mouth watering. Emptying it into a serving bowl she places it on the table and grabs them something to drink finally ready to sit down and to have the meal.

The conversation was kept light and the dinner continues and finally Charlotte remembers what she wanted to ask Bret before but forgot.*

"Who was that at the door before hun?"

Chairs

“Mm.” Bret is caught off guard but has no problem accepting or returning Charlotte’s kiss. He pulls her even tighter to himself, cocking his head and leaning into the exchange. Backing up a couple steps, he’s pressed back against the counter, the sizzling food going ignored as the passion lasts.

Just a little abruptly though, Bret’s hands slide from Charlotte’s back and find the counter on each side of himself. He lets the kiss continue for another moment, but then pulls away, his face slightly red as he strums his fingers restlessly on the counter.

“Supper,” he comments lamely. “We definitely need to eat supper.”


Carson chuckles and shakes his head, but lets Jess help clean. If it made her feel good, he wasn’t about to stop her.

With the radio going and the warm temperature in the room, it created a somewhat cozy atmosphere, despite the need to clean.

Turning chairs upside down on the tables to mop, Carson works as he normally does, knowing the routine well. At one point though, while he’s mopping, he doesn’t pay attention to where he’s going, and he backs right into Jess.

Spinning around, he laughs. “Sorry, I wasn’t watching…” As he speaks, he turns back around, his mop hitting one of the upturned chairs. Too late…it falls. And like a row of dominos, one by one, each chair on the tables clatter and bang to the floor, creating a resounding crash throughout the room. And all Carson can do is stand with his eyes wide and watch until the last chair has bounced to it’s fate.

He blinks and just stares… Finally he turns his head to Jess. “This goes no further…you got that?”


Scott lets Katie nestle into him as he eases down partially on his side, leaning against the armrest of the couch. How many times had they been here before? How many times had they sat like this, just enjoying each other’s company? Would this be the last?

His one hand holds hers, while his other lays across her shoulders, just holding her close.

The dim light in the living room and the dark television makes for a quiet atmosphere, but it’s not minded. The only sound is Domino racing back and forth with her toy, finally stopping and realizing that she’s the only one playing. She gives a little sigh and drops her toy. Surveying the couch, she hops up on the end and crawls up next to Katie, finding a nice little pocket to curl up in.

Scott’s mind wanders as his fingers slowly stroke Katie’s arm. He hadn’t told her everything…but it was still in his mind…

“Look, if this is about Katie and me…”

It hadn’t been. It had only been a business lunch. Reese had wanted them to discuss a delicate case privately, away from the office. But it had turned into an unexpected personal meeting.

“What do you mean? What are you talking about?”

Jason had immediately discovered his mistake. “Aw man…I’m sorry.” His words had been genuine.

The conversation had been civil, despite the tension. Scott had questioned Jason’s starting statement, and had found out the hard way about the night at Mom and Pop’s.

“…we were out back…I guess I was flirting with her, I don’t know…it just…she came up and kissed me.”

Scott’s heart had sunk. He’d suspected that Katie still had feelings for Jason, but knowing they’d kissed brought on a disappointment he hadn’t been ready for.

Jason had defended. “…I told her no…it didn’t feel right…I tried to leave and we argued. I got too riled and had an attack. Katie took me home and took care of me for the night…and that was that.”

His explanation was honest enough. Scott believed him, and had appreciated the openness. He hadn’t expected Jason to share as easily as he had…maybe Jason had simply known I was too late to try to hide anything.

They’d discussed the past a little…Scott had questioned the connection between Jason and Katie and how it affected other things. He’d found out more about the emotional bond. Then Scott had asked what he really wanted to know. “What about you, Jason…do you still love her?”

Jason hadn’t answered right away. There had been a long silence, and Scott had had to force Jason to look at him, repeating the question. “Do you?”

Jason had looked him square in the eye. “No.”

Part of Scott wanted to be glad with that comment. If Jason didn’t love Katie, then she couldn’t very well pursue him. Though at the same time, it was disheartening to think that she might be loving a man who didn’t return that love and never would.

And yet… Scott wondered. Jason’s tone didn’t lie…his eyes didn’t lie…but he was a master of emotions and Scott wouldn’t find it hard to believe if Jason could fool a lie detector.

Scott had been surprised at the answer…he’d thought Jason still had feelings for Katie too, with the way they interacted, especially lately. He wasn’t blind. But why would Jason lie? Didn’t he have more to gain if he would admit this love than hide it? Or was he hiding it because he thought Katie was better off with someone else? If that were the case, Scott would have to commend him for having guts. At the same time though…if Jason did love Katie, he wasn’t being fair with her by not showing it.

This had turned out to be a mess… how, Scott didn’t know. But it had. And poor Katie was getting the brunt of the whole thing. All their futures rode on her decision. It wasn’t fair…but what else was there to do?

Scott lowers his head further onto the armrest, not knowing how long Katie wanted to stay, but it didn’t matter to him. She could stay as long as she wanted, but if she felt she had to leave, he’d take her. For now though…he just wanted to sit…and be with her.

Here

*As Bret makes his way up Charlotte neck her pulse quickens just a bit and a smile along with a tiny giggle form.*

"Your a little frisky tonight arnt you."

*Turning her head slightly she starts to give give Bret a kiss when the doorbell rings. Letting out a sigh and shaking her head she watches Bret leave the room. Leaning down in the fridge she grabs some of the veggies, some garlic and than some chicken to add in.

As a few moments pass Charlotte stands at the counter and chops some veggies and throws them into a skillet along with the chicken the sizzled. As Bret puts his arm around and over Charlotte she automatically puts the knife down and brings her hand up to his arm and lays her head back for a moment closing her eyes and taking the moment in.

Before Charlotte never though about the future with a guy. It was living it one day at a time not looking at what was to come. But for the first time in her life, she could actually see herself looking ahead with Bret. Wondering if this was who she was to be with for the rest of her life.

Turning around to face Bret, Charlotte smiles wrapping both her arms around Bret's neck and pulling him closer to her till she was pressed up against him.*

"I think we were here."

*Leaning in Charlotte press her lips to him and her hands find the back of his head and her passion is brought forth. Letting the kiss linger for a while.*

*Katie can't help but smile at the Domino's enthusiasm to see her. Katie loved the little dogs energy and excitment it braught a smile to her face that would never fade no matter her mood.

Beinding down and peting Domino on the head and than throwing her toy Katie makes her way into the livingroom just looking around for a moment. Seeing Scott pat next to him giving the ok for her to sit Katie does so sinking down into the coutch. Leaning over Katie leans her hand on Scott and snuggles into him. Katie wasn't sure why or if it was even her answer but it felt like this might be on of the last times and how she was going to miss it. Just thinking about it made her sad. Bring her arms around Scott she just holds him he bodys warmth keeping her roomtempature and comfortanle. Katie's fingers interlocking with Scott's.*

*Jess gives a small nod as they head back to Mom and Pop's Jess can't help but feel a tad better after her conversation with Carson. He'd helped her feel better once again.

Walking a tiny bit close to him Jess keeps an eye on her sarroundings though feel much safer having Carson near.

Getting to Mom and Pop's Jess gives a small wave as Herb and Mable leave for the night showing a small bit of humor letting them know she would keep Carson in line. Once they are gone Jess siting at the counter and watches Carson listing to the music he had playing as well.

The more Jess watched the more she wanted to help untill finally She stands and comes behind the counter. Grabbing a rag and some cleaner she goes out to the floor and starts to clean off the tables and whiping the window cills and shakers down. Finishing up a few tables Jess looks up at Carson.*

"I need to earn those milkshakes some how dont I?"

*Giving a little wink Jess goes back to cleaning the tables.*

Cleaning

Bret throws up his hands. “I know, I know…I couldn’t keep a house clean if I got paid to. It’s my downfall. I guess I just need a good woman around here to keep me in line.”

Suddenly realizing the implications of the words he just said, his face reddens slightly and he tries to recover by reverting to the subject of food. “Stir fry sounds good…as a matter of fact, anything you whip up sounds good.”

He comes up behind Charlotte as she looks in the fridge, and puts his arms around her waist. “Mmm…looks like I got a few veggies…and there’s some meat in the freezer.”

Bret leans forward to kiss her neck teasingly, moving up to her cheek as he whispers. “And a cook that is to die for.”

The ringing doorbell makes him give a frustrated sigh. “Whoever that is has terrible timing. I’ll be back.” Leaving Charlotte in the kitchen he goes to the door, slowing as soon as he’s out of sight. He approaches the door with caution, opening it just a crack at first.

A tall black man is on the porch with a large manila envelope in his hand. Bret grits his teeth and opens the door wider, stepping out halfway, holding open the screen. “Lee, what are you doing,” he hisses. “You weren’t supposed to come here.”

Lee hands over the heavy envelope. “Johnny got the plates and Dan said to bring ‘em here. I’m just following orders.”

Bret snatches the package from him, displeased. “Well next time use your head. Just you being here puts this at risk.”

“Hey, off my case,” Lee defends. “As far as anyone is concerned, I’m just paying a house call. Just hold up your end of the deal and we’ll be fine.”

Bret gives a sarcastic laugh. “Sure. Leave it on my shoulders. Just like old times, right? I don’t even know why Dan wanted me back in on this. I thought he’d learned the first time.”

Lee cracks a sly smile. “Don’t tell me you’ve forgotten you’re the best.”

“I figured Dan would be scared I’d rat on him.”

“Not with what he’s got over your head.”

Bret scowls. “Don’t remind me. Just get out of here will you?”

“Fine. But be there tomorrow for the warmup.” Lee turns and steps off the porch.

Bret watches him until he’s gone, finally backing up to shut the door again. He goes to the nearby closet and puts the envelop up above the coat rack, pausing a moment. This was stupid…he was stupid…but he’d made his choice… He shakes his head then ambles back to the kitchen. Coming up behind Charlotte again, he drapes his arms over her shoulders. “So…where were we?”


Scott gives a slight nod. He was more than willing to finish off this evening together. Though maybe a bit awkward, he did not want it to end on a sour note.

Once the meal is paid for and Katie has her leftovers, they head out. The drive is quiet… Scott lets the silence be, not trying to overcome it with needless talk. Sometimes quiet was just better anyway.

Getting to his place, he waits for Katie and lets her inside ahead of him. Domino gives a short bark and comes bounding in from the living room, her whole body wiggling with glee. She jumps up on Katie’s legs and begs to be petted, nuzzling and licking her fingers. Then just as fast, she’s racing back to the living room, grabbing her favorite chew toy and running back. Skidding on the linoleum, she runs into Katie’s leg, unable to stop herself. Shaking her head a little, she looks up at Katie, begging for more attention.

Despite previous tension, Scott can’t help but chuckle. “You still girl,” he croons. He takes off his jacket and throws it over a chair, leading the way to the living room. Sinking down on the couch, he looks up at Katie. Maybe they would be taking this easy between them for a while, but he didn’t want her to feel unwanted. He pats the cushion beside him, offering her a place to sit, or a shoulder if she needed it.


Carson’s shoulders drop a little at Jess’ tone, even though she thanks him. “I could tell you this same thing a million times, and you could still choose not to believe it. It takes your heart, Jess.”

He nods at her. “It takes you believing in yourself…not just some words that I rattle off.”

He pauses a moment, softening his tone a little. “That guy waiting for you could be standing three feet away and you wouldn’t see it until your own heart was ready. Don’t give up…don’t grow hard…’cause in the long run, you’ll regret it.”

The sound of nearby traffic prevents peaceful silence, but there is still peace here within the quiet park, and Carson leans back again, letting his mind roam for a few minutes before he stands up. “We better get back before Herb thinks I deserted him. Not to mention, I’m getting cold.”

The walk back to Mom and Pop’s is brisk, the night air growing chillier. Arriving through the back door, Carson finds things just closing up. Cleaning still needs to be done, but Carson offers to do it, letting Herb and Mabel go home for the night.

Shedding his jacket, but keeping his ball cap on, Carson cranks up the radio in the kitchen and grabs a mop and bucket, going out onto the front floor. “Make yourself at home,” he offers Jess. “Won’t take me long, then if you want, I can still make those milkshakes.”

Stir fry

*As Charlotte walks into the kitchen with Bret she cant help but stop and place her hands on her hips looking around for a moment shaking her head. As the humor shows itself in her eyes.*

"Didn't I just clean this kitchen a few days ago? What am I going to do with you?"

*Charlotte smerks as walks past Bret and looks in the fridge. He didn't have much but she was sure she could whip something up.*

"How about stir fry? Sound good to you hun?"

*Jess listens to Carson, and takes in his words. How right he was about alot of stuff, and how his words made sence. Now if only Jess could get her mind to believe it.*

"Yeah, I'm sure he's out there somewhere just waiting for someone light me huh?"

*The sarcastice tone is in Jess voice and after the words were said she relized it. Looking back to Carson her eyes dim just a little.*

"I'm sorry I know your trying to help and I apresheate it I really do. Its just hard thats all. Keep telling me all this stuff though and sooner or later I might start believeing it."

*Jess gives a small smile.*

"Thanks Carson."

*Katie lets out and than sucks in a sigh trying to contain and controll herself. Pulling away from Scott she just sits silent for a moment. Finally turning to him she gives a smile.*

"I think going to see Domino would be nice. I'd like to finish out our evning anyways. If thats ok with you."

*Katie waves Aerith over for the check and asks for a box for there left over food.*

*As Kyle drives out of sight Misty gives on last wave. She had, had a good evening and everything was good with Kyle. It always was. Now that his voice was starting to come back there was even more laughing and joking that was throw between them both. Turning Misty makes her way to the pourch and just sits down at the step for a moment.

It was a nice night out. A bit chilli but Misty liked it. Glancing up to the moon for a moment Misty's mind wonders to Carson and what he was doing. Hoping he was doing ok now her mind goes once again make to Kyle and she sits just reflecting.*

What you deserve

Bret smiles at Charlotte's offer. Something about having her stay here and cook was appealing...perhaps it made this house feel less empty.

"Mm...your cooking sounds too good to pass up...and seeing as though I've got a mountain of movies I never watch, surely there's one to keep us occupied."

He grins slyly. "As if we need any more entertainment."

He stands up and stretches, heading for the kitchen. "Come on... I'll help you cook if you can find something in this mess of a kitchen."


As Jess talks, Carson just listens. He keeps his eyes fixed on the sky or the park, hearing the pain in Jess' voice, and unsure what to do with it. He had so much pain himself...it was hard to take on another's. But she did bear so much on her shoulders...it was more than just a stupid incident with Peter...her hurt went clear back to her childhood when she'd felt rejected and abandoned...completely alone.

Carson mulls over her words as she ends, wondering at his own response. "Oh...I don't know, Jess... Sometimes I wonder if being loved in the first place was worth it... I suppose in the end I'd say it was... I guess maybe the pain is different for someone like me, who knows it was their own fault they're alone now."

He sighs, letting his breath out slowly. "Supposed to make a wish, eh?" A wry grin forms on his lips. "I think any of my wishes would be too impossible to ever come true."

Thinking a little more, he can't help but go back to Jess' words about her past. He'd seen that tear, though hadn't drawn attention to it. He knew Jess just well enough to know that she wasn't one to cry easily.

"People say the past makes us who we are... I guess there must be some truth to that, looking at my own past... my childhood... my family experiences. I could blame my father for a lot of things today if I wanted to. But I guess...even if some of my experiences molded the way I think, I can't let myself be bound to it. I've been a jerk...I've been worse than an enemy...I've done things that I deserve to die for... but the only one I can blame is myself. And if that's the case...then I figure I have just as much power to change my future."

He shrugs, avoiding details about his own childhood. He had never spoken to anyone about it, not even Misty, and wasn't planning to discuss it now. "I guess...even if your past was dim, Jess, you have the power to be whoever you want to be now. Whether you never felt loved or not...that doesn't mean that you never will... whether you never had true friends or not... that doesn't mean that you never will. There are too many variables in life... too many times that it's our own choices that take us down certain paths. You may think you're too scared to love, to ever get that far. You may think you're not worthy of being loved back. But that's all based on a past that's history... and to believe it now is to lie to yourself, which is a shame."

Carson finally turns his head to look at Jess. "Don't let a bum childhood ruin what you've got going for you now. You've got guts, determination, a heart that wants to love, good looks and a future that hasn't been written yet. You've got too much potential to let it go down the drain - to throw it away is to be totally unfair to yourself."

He knew this all too well...he'd thrown everything away at one point, and it had led him to eventual misery. Only when he'd been caught by TJY had he started to see it.

Searching Jess' eyes for a moment, he finally looks back up at the moon. "Don't be afraid of those who want to show you they care...if you are, then you'll never find that one you deserve."


Scott shifts his weight and moves over a little for Katie, slipping his arms around her to return the hug. He holds her close, resting his head against hers and rubbing her back. "Don't be sorry," he whispers. "It's okay."

A tear rolls down his face to be lost in Katie's soft hair. Scott's voice remains hoarse and quiet. "Sometimes that which we love the most we have to give up, simply because we do love it that much."

Rocking her a little, he just holds her, not caring who sees them, not caring how long they sit. They both needed this.

Finally though, he knows that they can't be here forever...at some point, they do need to move on. Giving Katie's head a kiss, Scott pulls away, reaching out to wipe away her tears. He forces the best smile that he can to the surface, trying to mask the pain in his eyes. He didn't know the future...no one could...and things could change...but deep down...he knew that this was only the beginning...something told him that the marriage he'd hoped for with Katie would never be realized. But he would not let those thoughts take him down...not a second time. Katie was too important.

"You want to come over to my place for a little while?" he offers. "Say hi to Domino...wind down before going home?"

So I was told

*Charlotte's eyes show she is pleased that Bret likes the small gift. She had really hoped it would mean alot to him and it apeared to have and for that it made her feel good. She couldn't deny she was growing closer to Bret with each passing day. Charlotte had never felt like this before about anyone before but now she wouldn't pass it up for the world.*

"Well, if you havn't had dinner yet I though we could go out or I could cook something here and than maybe we can watch a movie or play a game. I'm pretty much up for anything as long as I get to be with you."

*Jess walks with Carson enjoying the night air and the cool breeze. It felt good to get out and around, it felt even better to be out with someone. Even though as they walked they didnt talk much Jess was still enjoying herself.

As Carson sits down on the bench Jess just scans the area for a moment before decieding to sit down next to Carson and turn her head upwards herself. It had been a long time since she'd looked and actully payed attachen to the moon. To long indeed and it braught back many memories.*

"When I was younger, I use to sneek away to the top floor of the orphanage and look out the window at the moon..."

*Without even thinking Jess continues to talk. It was a rare thing for her to do so. Most of the time her past was kept to herself.*

"...I always though my parents were looking at it as well, and some day would be back for me. Than as I got older the cold hard truth of life hit me, and I didnt really look at the moon anymore. I guess for some..."

*Jess gives a sidelong glance to Carson knowing there was a deeper maning to his words than what he lead on. The people in his life he loved, and he strived to keep there love.*

"...knowing the people they love could be looking at the same moon, and thinking about them could bring comfort. That is what people should hold onto, because they don't know just how lucky they are to have that in there life. Even if they don't really talk to the person anymore. Just knowing that they once had that how lucky they are. As for me, that was gone along time ago, I never really new what love was or is. Sometimes when I see how people get hurt, or how much trouble it is to have those things I think I'm lucky, but than when I am alone or have a chanse to think I relize just how lonly I truly am."

*Jess lets out a sigh and looks across the park just letting her eyes linger for a moment as her mind wondered. An unexspected tear rolls form her eye as she quickly flicks it away. It had been a long time since she wondered or even thought about her family. Where they were, how they were and if they even remembered her. It braught a new pain to Jess already scared heart and a new confustion of why they had left her. These were questions Jess new she would never get answer and that only made it worse.

Trying to whipe the memories and thoughts from her mind Jess looks to Carson and gives a small smile and than looks back up at the sky with a chuckle in her voice.*

"You know, the first star you see in the sky your ment to make a wish on it. The one you hold the close to your heart will hear it, and your wish might come true. Or so I was told."

*Katie looks down again as Scott talks unable to meet his eyes. Could she do this? Could they really? How would it feel? what would happen? Scott was right they she needed to straghter things out and pick a path to take. She couldnt play both sides but that ment taking time as well to think through everything.*

"If the white rabbit can bear with me, than I think I can try too. I just, don't want to hurt anyone."

*Katie looks up at Scott meeting his eyes, as her own tears finally spill over. Why did she feel like this. Why did it have to hurt so much. Searching his eyes Katie looks, how she loved them, how she loved him and how life wasnt fair.*

"I'm sorry Scott."

*Standing Katie walks over to the booth across from her and slids in next to Scott. Reaching out she wraps her arms around him in a hug. Now caring who was looking, or wondering, Not caring what anyone though. Katie just wanted a hug from him.*

Ornament

Scott finally leans back in his seat, letting Katie’s hands slip from his. A bit of humor sparks in his eyes behind the dullness. “How about cloning yourself so there’s enough Katie to go around?”

He shakes his head. “Oh, Katie…” He sighs. “What are we going to do with you, hmm? You’re just too good to be true…your heart is too big, and your goal to make everyone else happy is too lofty. But if there’s one thing I don’t want you ever to consider is leaving yourself out in the cold. You’re too good for that…and you deserve to have someone love you.”

He looks down for a moment, then back up at her, having grown serious again, the emotions still etched in his face. “No matter what…you can’t worry about hurting me anymore. Because no matter what…I’ll be okay, and I want you to know that. The last time…I was wrong to have reacted the way I did. I hadn’t trusted God enough, and I hadn’t realized that the me I’d become around you didn’t have to die when you weren’t around. Those are the things I see now… so I just think you should know that… well…”

He pauses again, not wanting to say these words, but knowing he must. “…if you wind up saying goodbye to me… I’ll hurt, but it’s not the end. I’ll always want to be your friend… I want more than that, but… being your friend is better than nothing, and…and I would be okay. I just want you to be happy… no matter what. And if staying with me is the answer, then you know I’m thrilled. But if going after Jason is the answer instead, then who am I to stand in your way?”

Scott pushes his plate further to the side, not knowing where to go from here. “I know that you probably can’t sort through all of this tonight, so…” The emotions come flooding back, pooling in his eyes again, though he wills them not to spill over anymore. “…so I think maybe…for now…we just sort of…lighten up a little. And I don’t mean not spend time together… I just mean…”

He shakes his head. “Maybe I don’t know what I mean. I guess I just don’t want to either of us to fall any further if the end result is going to hurt more, so… until you…we… figure this out… no future planning. I’m here for you like I always have been – that’s not going to change. But when you’re ready…when you can think about this and find your way… you need to settle on one path and one only. I wish it could go both ways, but it can’t. It wouldn’t be fair to me, to you, or even to Jason.”

Scott takes a deep breath and lets it out slowly. “How ‘bout it, Alice? Can we do this?”


Carson grins as Jess gives him a bad time, and just as she warns him, he backs into a light pole. Hitting the back of his head gives him a slight jolt and he spins around, staggering a little more than necessary as he starts to laugh. “I need some side mirrors or something.”

Giving a sigh, he starts forward straight this time, heading for the park. They walk through town, going by shops that were closed for the night, crossing intersections and dodging other pedestrians.

Arriving at the park, it’s lit with lights throughout, though there is no one else there. The sidewalks are well-lit, but the fountain has been drained for the cold season.

Ambling by some benches and around trees, Carson slows his walk, just letting the night air refresh him. He had a lot of time to think lately…too much time it seemed sometimes. But one of these days he was going to have to move on. It had been slow going so far… but it was time he started looking up again. He’d lost Misty…right now there was nothing much he could do about it, especially if she was now with Kyle. All he could do was try to keep himself going in the right direction and stay that way.

Coming up to another bench, Carson opts to stop walking, and eases himself down. Leaning back, he tilts his head up, searching for the moon. He finds it, though it’s hard. “Well…looks like there are about three stars out tonight,” he muses with a slight chuckle. The streetlights prevented too much star gazing, even when the sky was clear. “Ever wonder who else is looking at them the same time you are?”


“I could go for some good old fashioned wallowing time,” Bret agrees with humor. “But we’ll plan on day after tomorrow ‘cause I got a few things to take care of.”

He settles his head back and just looks into Charlotte’s eyes, her touch relaxing him, putting him in almost a trance-like state.

He blinks though, the moment broken as she goes for her bag, then hands him the necklace. Holding it up and seeing the coin, a wide grin spreads. It was more than just a necklace, it was more than just an inside joke. “I love it, and it’s not cheesy – not to me at least.” Though not one to wear anything other than a watch, he’s not going to just put it away somewhere. “My rearview mirror gets another ornament.”

Reaching up, he pulls Charlotte down for another kiss. “Thank you.”

Finally pulling himself up in a sitting position, he runs a hand through his hair and yawns. “Alright, Miss Lockheart. What’s on the agenda for tonight?

Home

*Katie trys to calm herself down not even relizing what she was probely doing to Scott with her emotions. Sometimes she still forgot. Instince just said to get upset but for Katie she had to try and not do that.

Lowering her emotions a little bit Katie is quiet. Trying to sort things through in her mind. What did she want. What did Katie really want?*

"I don't know what I wan't Scott. I'm so messed up, maybe I shouldn't have anyone and thats the hardest thing of all. I don't like thinking about me, its just makes me happy to see everyone alse happy."

*That was the truth Katie liked seeing others happy before herself thats just how she ticked. Since Katie had started living at her aunts ranch she had stoped worrying about what she wanted because when she did it made her sad. Now she was being told to think about herself first and she didn't want too. Home....was the first thing that poped into her mind. She was awfly home sick if that ment anything. Home....what did she really want.*

*Jess can't help but chuckel at Carson.*

"I don't think your so scary. Well at least to me your not."

*Jess jogs after Carson as he starts to walk away. She just wanted to see Carson anyways so this would work.*

"Hey, your not getting away from me that easly you know. I think a short walk to the part sounds nice."

*After Carson turns around Jess slows a little so she can still see Carson's face and a small smile cross her lips. She diden't want to be alone, she did hate it. And going back to TJY was not to high on her things to do.*

"Mmmm...how could I turn down one of your milkshakes huh? There is just something about them I cant get over. Even if I am not hungry, Helping you close up sounds like fun, the company not being so bad eather."

*Jess gives him a playful elbow to the arm.*

"Your gonna fall on your butt if you don't watch where your going there killer."

*As Charlotte it pulled down to rest of Bret's chest the grin on her lips.*

"Your not ment to sleep when I am coming over though."

*Leaning down Charlotte press her lips to Brets letting it linger for a moment and than pulling away.*

"I thought about calling but I wanted it to be a saprise. Yep done with work for the night and the next two days off. I thought maybe we could spend the time wallowing together or something."

*Charlotte brings her hand up to Bret's face and brushes a bit of his matted hair up before running a hand through it. Sitting up for a minute Charlotte takes the bag that had droped onto the floor and pulls the necklace from it. Laying back on Bret's chest Charlotte's eyes dance hoping he will like the necklace.*

"I saw this and I thought it fit perfect for us. I got one for myself too. If you dont like it let me know. I know its kind of cheesy."

You

Unexpected and unwanted tears well up in Scott’s eyes, as his dominant emotions suddenly flare. The feeling that he wanted to cry was there already, but something was taking it to the extreme, along with a strange nervousness. He blinks, trying to stay on top. “Katie…” His voice is almost a whisper, as a partial smile is forced to the surface.

He leans forward, pulling her hand closer to give it a kiss. “Babe, you’re gonna make me fall to pieces. Try taking it easy, alright?” He remains gentle, knowing that Katie might not even realize what she was doing.

Scott swallows hard, ignoring the tears, and ignoring anyone who might be watching them in the restaurant. He looks Katie in the eye, trying his best not to make a huge deal, but at the same time, not wanting to just pretend that this whole thing was nothing, either.

His fingers tighten their grip, trying to bring comfort, when he himself was full of turmoil. “You…you have been the sunshine in my life… I’m not even sure I can describe what it feels like to have you here…to know you love me… to be able to share my love. You taught me how to love Katie…” Scott’s eyes smile despite the tears. “And for that…I will be forever grateful… forever knowing that you have been one of the greatest gifts I’ve ever received.”

Scott lowers his head for a moment, continuing to try and not be so emotional. “I won’t lie to you… My feelings are hurt and… knowing that you still have love for Jason is… it’s hard to deal with because… because I love you enough that… that I’d want you to love me with your whole heart…”

He pauses, collecting his thoughts. “Katie…if I was confident that we could truly make it together, I’d ask you again to marry me in a heartbeat. But I don’t want to do that to you. I don’t want you to be constantly battling between your love for me and your love for Jason. I don’t want you constantly being afraid that you’re hurting me when your love for Jason shows itself.”

Scott holds Katie’s hands up, resting his elbows on the table, and leaning his forehead on their hands, his eyes hidden. As hard as it was to say these words, he had to. “Sometimes… sometimes you can’t help who you love. I know that first hand… So I can’t… I can’t just ask you to stop loving Jason. Because that might be impossible.”

He raises his head, blinking back a tear and looking at Katie again. “If I knew that eventually you could love only me, I would wait…I would wait an eternity if I knew that would be the end result. But… but I don’t know if that’s true. So maybe…”

Scott lets out a frustrated sigh. “I don’t even know what I’m saying, Katie. Help me out here… what do we do? What happens now? What… where do we go from here? What do you want, Katie? And I don’t want you thinking about what I think, or what Jason thinks, or who’s hurt and who’s not…”

A sternness has entered Scott’s tone, though he remains gentle. “I want you to think about Katie…I want you to think about what you want most... without thinking of anyone else this time. You have a huge heart… that’s what I fell in love with. But it’s so big that you think of others before yourself too often sometimes. You need to do what’s best for you…not me…you.”


Jason's eyes open and he shifts his weight on the couch, straightening out the crick in his neck. Staring at the television for a moment, he focuses, then realizes that something feels a little strange. Something was different... not a lot, but it was there. Katie? Something was bothering her enough that the emotional pull had a strange curve to it. He wanted to ask why, but resisted. He thought he knew.


Carson is relieved that it’s only Jess and that’s she’s alright. He lets out a breath that’s visible in the chilly night air. Instinctively, he takes his free hand to give her shoulder a gentle pat and squeeze. “Hey, calm down, you’re alright. But next time, forget about scenery and take a familiar route so you stop running into scary Aussies like me in the dark, eh?”

He chuckles, and puts his hands in his pockets as Jess backs away. “Nah, no work…I just told Herb I’d be back to help close up later. I thought some fresh air would do me good so I was heading to the park.”

He pauses and cocks his head, knowing that Jess didn’t have too many people now that she’d find company with, and he wasn’t set on being alone. He starts down the sidewalk again, talking over his shoulder. “Unless you were dead set on something at Mom and Pop’s, you’re welcome to tag along.”

He turns to walk backward for a moment, a grin on his face. “And if you really don’t want to go back to TJY for a while, when we get back, you can help me close up, ‘cause I think there’s two milkshakes that will be waiting with our names on them.”


“Mmmm….” Bret groans and rolls over, blinking as he brings Charlotte into focus. “Isn’t that what the night is for?” he mumbles. “Sleeping?”

Without warning, he reaches out, pulling Charlotte down so she’s resting on his chest. Cradling her head, he gives her a warm kiss. “I thought you were gonna call, but this is better. Done with work?”

Lazy Bones

*Katie keeps her eyes down at Scott's hands...so many emotions and things to think of inside. It was hard to know what way was up.*

"No Scott, its not wrong of you. Its not wrong of you at all."

*Katie lets out a long sighl She was lost and confused. Worst of all she new she was hurting Scott.

As Scott talks about Jason never returning the lost she brings her eyes up to search Scott's face. Why would he say something like that? Than it dawns on her Jason and Scott had lunch today, could it be that, that is what they talked about at lunch today? Katie wanted to know but this was not the time for her to reach out to Jason. Surly he would already be able to feel her emotions pull from being upset that was enough.*

"I don't want to hurt you Scott, and I am sorry I have again. I know what I have, and I know I love you. Your right to that this whole thing is not fair to you. I...I don't know how long it will take me to get over Jason and I know it's unfair of me to ask you to wait so I would never do that and on the other hand the thought of losing you kills me inside. I....I don't know, I don't even know what I am trying to say anymore."

*Katie leans back in the booth her eyes still threating to spill over but doing her best to keep them in. Katie felt so confused, so lost, and she felt suddinly alone. This was her fault and she new it, this was her doing because she couldn't keep her stupid feelins inside. Everything was coming apart again because of her.*

*As Jess continues to walk she trys to keep her mind cleared and not on everything alse. Quicking her pace even more and keeping her head down. Turning the courner she always runs into someone. Giving a gasp and a jump Jess takes a few steps backwards. Jess looks up quick and finally relaxes seeing and hearing it was Carson. Steping closer to Carson again Jess takes his arm and leans her face into it for a moment trying to hide her face as the color comes to it. She's been scaire but she hated to addmit it.*

"I was coming to see you but I wanted to take a differnt rout. I was tired of seeing the same thing, and being in that white room."

*Jess finally removes her head from Carson shoulder and looks up at him the emotion aparent in her eyes even though she tryed to hide it as she still held onto Carson's arm.*

"I got myself lost I think, and I guess my mind played tricks on me as well and freaked me out. So, thats why I am here."

*Geting herself to stop shaking Jess relizes she is still holding onto Carson's arm and lets go taking a few steps backwards again.*

"You didn't have to work tonight?"

*Pulling into Bret's driveway Charlotte turns the car off and gives a smile seeing the TV on. Grabing the small bag from the passanger side seat Charlotte gets out of the car and heads up to the door giving a knock. Not receving an answer Charlotte knocks again only to be greeted with silence. Trying the door and finding it lock she reaches into her bag looking for the key. Opening the door and sliping inside she heads into the living room finding Bret on the coutch asleep.

For a moment Charlotte looks down at him and just smiles watching him. Than placing a gentil hand on her shoulder she leans down plating a kiss on his cheek.*

"Bret, you lazy bones. Are you going to sleep all night on me?"

What can I do?

Scott listens to Katie, his eyes slowly drifting downward as he twirls his glass on the table. He slumps in his seat a little, though it’s obvious he’s doing his very best not to jump to conclusions or become upset.

Hearing Katie’s final statement, a half a smile, though vague, surfaces. “Yeah…I know you love me.”

He swallows hard and just lets silence rule for a couple minutes. He understood Katie’s words…but he wasn’t sure he understood how she felt. He felt as though he should shrug the whole thing off, while at the same time he felt jealous and played.

Finally Scott looks up, searching to find Katie’s eyes. “You know… you’ve really turned my world upside down. You’ve taught me so much about myself… you’ve brought out the best in me… you’ve shown me what it’s like to love.” He pauses, offering the same forced smile. “I love you so much…”

Emotions pool behind his eyes. “But I don’t know what to do. If…if you would have said that you were just caught up in the moment, or that there really weren’t any feelings behind that kiss, I think I could have accepted that and been fine. But… but now I know that you still love Jason.”

Scott shifts his weight a little, his discomfort obvious. “I…I don’t know what to say, Katie. I know you love me, and I know that’s real. But…what am I supposed to do now? I almost feel like I’m in a competition for your heart. I guess maybe I’d hoped I’d have the whole thing. Is that so wrong of me?”

His gaze drops again. “I know it was risky of me in the first place to have won you over, practically stealing you from Jason. I knew then, that there was a good chance you’d eventually leave me to go back to him. But I guess… I guess somewhere along the line, I gained confidence that you really would stick it out with me. Even after you left, then wanted to come back…Jason just didn’t seem to be a factor. And now…”

Scott sighs deeply, his hand slowly reaching across the table to stop Katie’s nervous napkin shredding. He takes her hand gently in his, just looking at it, running his thumb across her palm. “I don’t know if I can go on like this…knowing that you love Jason too. I understand it’s hard for you but… it’s not fair to us… to our relationship… if you have feelings for another man. Feelings that… that are obviously strong enough that you acted on them.”

His eyes move up again. “What can I do, Katie… what can I do to win the rest of your heart? Or will you always have a longing for another man who doesn’t even return your love?”


Carson stuffs his hands in his pockets and starts down the sidewalk. The park. It was dark, it was chilly, no one would be there…it would be a nice destination, and a good place to rest before walking back.

Heading down a couple blocks, he crisscrosses a couple streets, then heads around a corner. His ballcap shielding his eyes, and his head bent, he wasn’t paying much attention to where he was going, and as he turns the corner he almost runs right into someone else.

Startled, he stops short and backs up a step, snapping his head up, his eyes wide. Blinking, he tries to slow his racing heart. “Good, land, Jess! What on earth are you doing out here?”


Bret sacks out on his couch, listening to the droning television. So this was it… this was what is life was really about. It had come full circle once again… but would the outcome be different this time?

Rolling over so his back is toward the television, he leaves it on, but lets his eyes fall shut. His half-eaten supper was getting cold and dry on the coffee table, but he really didn’t care. He just wanted…. maybe he didn’t know what he wanted, but he felt like simply turning his back on the world. If he wasn’t going to go out and drown his sorrows, he might as well try to sleep them off.

Sigh

*Katie's eyes shoot to Scott's as he sits across the table and the mention of the kiss with Jason came up. She was going to tell Scott what happend, she was going to tell him she kissed Jason but she had put it off all day and now he new by finding out himself. Once again Katie had messed up. Droping her gaze she looks down at the empty plat in front of her not sure what she should say. So many things ran through her mind it was hard to pick what one she was focused on. It was hard to think at all.*

"I..I did. Last night. I was going to bring it up to you, but I kept putting it off."

*Katie runs her own fingers on the table and find her napkin. In a nervouse habit she starts to put peaces off one at a time into small scraps.*

"I...don't know why I did...."

*Katie stops herself short for a moment as she closes her eyes to regain her composure. Tears wanted to fall they wanted to come forth.*

"...No thats a lie. I don't want to make excuses because thats not fair to you I guess. Mmmm...I..Scott you know I love you more than anything. My love for you runs very deep, but I guess somewhere I still love Jason too. I tryed to lock it away, because I wanted to be with you. I pushed it into a courner, and kept it there to keep it as only a memorie. But after my accident and I forgot and than remembered I found it hard to keep it locked away..."

*Katie lets out a long sigh and she continues to rip the napkin.*

"But than I did again and thats when we got back together. I kept it hidden locked away, forgoten so well, but I dont know what happend the other night it just....I don't know how to describe it."

*Katie looks up at Scott for a moment searching his eyes to see how he felt. She wasent sure what to say if she shold say anymore Katie just didn't know.*

"...Don't doubt my love Scott because that is not faulse not one bit."

*Katie lets out another sigh and is silent for a moment not sure what to say, what alse Scott wanted to know. Katie just didn't know, all she new is she didnt want to hurt Scott, that was the last thing she ever wanted to do.*

*Giving a jump at a sound behind her Jess turns around and just stairs for a moment not seeing anything. Putting her hand in her pocket and griping the lighter tightly in her fist her eyes roam the area.

What had she come down this way? Why did she want to take a walk and alone non the less? Why was she being such a scairdy cat?

Jess hated the way she felt, non of this would have bothered her before. It just would of been another walk and maybe the destanation would of been differnt but other than that she would of been ok. But now she wasn't. Every loud noise mad her jump and her heart race.

Turning back around Jess continues. As the noises around her continue she picks up her pace. She just wanted to get to her destanation now, she didn't want to walk alone anymore. Hoping she was going the right way Jess walks swiftly.*

*Charlotte lets out a long tired sigh as she gets into her car. Work was finally over and she could relaxe for the next two days. How she was looking forward to it.

Pulling out of the parking lot Charlotte's next destanation was Bret's house.*

Fresh air

Jason flops down on his couch. It seemed the same as every other night. He sighs, and flips on the television. The only difference tonight was that he didn’t have any supper. He hadn’t been hungry…he’d just been tired…just wanted to sack out and do nothing.


Kyle grins as Misty gets into the truck. “I wouldn’t care if you had bedhead – you’re still the prettiest girl on the planet.”

Giving a nod, he starts the engine. “The lakefront it is, melady.”



Scott shrugs as he continues to stare at he menu. “Maybe Herb changed the selections?” He grins. “Stranger things have happened.” He gives Katie’s hand a squeeze. “Give me a minute…I’ll find what I want…I’m sure of it…I think…”

Supper is pleasant. Scott keeps up small talk about TJY, photography, Domino and Texas. They enjoy their food, and finally it’s just relaxing after the meal.

Scott grows fairly quiet after a while, finally what’s been on his mind, coming to the surface again.

“Katie…” his voice proves a bit of strain… perhaps worry… His eyes fall to the table, and he runs his finger along the rim of his glass, trying to figure out the best way to word this.

Finally he looks up to her again. “I, um… I wanted this to be a nice evening for the two of us before I said anything…then I didn’t want to say anything at all…but I wanted to be fair with myself.”

He pauses, running words through his mind again. “I…I know that you kissed Jason last night…” He lets his sentence hang, his eyes searching her for the answers of why.


Carson checks the clock before hanging up his apron. He was used to sticking around even after he didn’t have to, but tonight, some fresh air sounded good.

“Hey, Herb, I’m taking off. Be back in time to help close up.”

Going to his room first, he grabs his denim jacket to throw it on, changes his shoes, then heads to the door. Exiting into the evening air was a nice cool shock to his skin. Walking only a few feet, he leans back against the brick wall, just breathing for a few minutes, wanting to figure out a destination rather than walking aimlessly, though it wasn’t easy without having a bar in mind.

hug OR kiss

* Entering TJY Jess walks slowly across the floor that was filled with people working. Not looking up to meet anyones eyes Jess makes her way to the small room closing the door behind her. Sinking down on the bed Jess lets her head rest in the pillow and closes her eyes. This had been her quiet place, her safe heaven. But is was begining to make her more depressed, siting not doing anything, sleeping. Jess didnt really want to do much but she didn't want to sit and do nothing eather. Maybe she would go see Carson again later, or maybe find a new bar to go to. Something anything to keep her mind busy.*

*Misty can't help but laugh as she watches Kyle leave shaking her head and calling after him.*

"I'll try to be ready. I don't know though I didn't get a hug OR a kiss goodbye."

*Misty folds her arms across her chest as she stands inside waiting for Kyle to return.*

*Returning home Charlotte takes the note from the door as a smile spreads across her face. Yes after work she would go and see Bret. If he was wallowing that would mean he would probley need company again tonight and Charlotte new maybe the bar and some pool was in order.

Heading up the steps Carlotte gets ready for work and heads out taking the small bag with the gift for Bret with her. Tonight she would give it to him.*

~*~ Later in the day ~*~

*Katie looks at Scott from across the table and smiles at Scott before qurking a question eyebrow.*

"Hun, you have been here a million times and you still need to read the menu?"

*Katie can't help but giggle a little as she looks down at her menu and than back at Scott. She couldn't help the feeling of something being wrong but surly if there was Scott would of said something by now.*

"Mmmm....I think my desition is easy I want the chicken-al-king tonight."

*Katie reaches across the table and locks her fingers with Scott's the smile still on her face.*

"What are you in the mood for than go from there."

*Finally exiting her apartment Misty makes her way to Kyle's truck. Dressed nice in a black tank top and jeans Misty slips into the truck smileing.*

"Sorry I am running a bit late, was trying to get my hair just right."

*Misty's hair was done up on her head with a clip and ringlets hung down and around her face giving it shape.*

"So I was thinking maybe we could go to that little place down by the water front. Its not to cold out tonight and this might be one of the last times to go this season."

*Exiting TJY Jess makes her way once again back to Mom and Pop's but this time she takes a differnt rout. Staying in the shadows Jess just wanted differnt scenery, but in the end resalt she would be at Mom and Pop's to see Carson.*

Supper

Carson gives a nod to Jess and watches her until she's gone. Giving a little sigh, h tries to focus on work, quickly becoming busy with food orders.

It's not until later in the day when Carson has enough time for a break, slipping back to the room that he was still calling home. Sinking down on the small bed, he takes his ballcap off and leans back against the wall. His mind had been trying to wander all day and he hadn't let it. Now that he was alone, it refused his attempts, finally going where it willed, whether he liked it or not.

Australia... the Agency... Ashlyn... mistakes... murders... TJY... more mistakes... Misty... mistake after mistake after mistake... cases... Misty... Ashlyn... TJY... Dani... Misty... Misty... the Bullseye... Velvet... Vegas... Misty... mistakes...

Carson closes his eyes and sighs deeply. No matter where he was or what he did, he always managed to screw things up. Could be his own life, could be someone else's, but he'd find a way to ruin it somehow by his stupid actions. If only he had something to keep him out of trouble... He was doing well at the moment, with Herb over him. But what about when he could finally get his own place again? What about when he could finally afford another car? Carson feared himself. He knew without someone there, as soon as he had the opportunity, he'd be off on the wrong road again, making the same mistakes over and over and over again. He finally realized his own pattern, and by now, he loathed it.

He glances down, just wishing for once that he wasn't himself...he'd liked himself before, but that's what got him into trouble half the time was believing he was big stuff. And maybe he had been...but he'd used it when he shouldn't have. He wanted his own confidence back...he wanted his own self worth back...but for some reason, it continued to evade him.

Strumming his fingers on the bed, he looks down at his arm. Some things did last a lifetime... and he'd screwed up enough this time that a reminder to last him his life might not be a bad thing. It was almost a form of self-punishment because he knew that though it would become less, the pain would always be there. But if it was pain in the heart that kept his head on straight, then perhaps it was worth it. ...he knew a guy in town that owed him.


Kyle pulls Misty around in a dance maneuver, twirling her, then bringing her back into his arms. "Good." He plants a quick kiss on her forehead. "Then I'll swing by your place at seven o'clock. And be thinking because you get to pick where we go."

His cell phone goes off and he rolls his eyes. "That'll be Mike. We're supposed to get together with Cryptic. I'll see you later."

Letting Misty go, Kyle slides toward the door, bouncing off the doorframe into the hall where he disappears.


Taped to Charlotte's door at home is a handwritten note:

The future is all but chance waiting to happen. Sometimes you just can't say no to fate.

Sorry I missed your call. Sleeping off the aftereffects of a good wallow - wasn't as much fun drinking alone though. Miss you. Call me after work?

-Bret


Like all days where anticipation of a fun evening is present, it goes slowly. The minutes turn into hours, slowly, slowly, the hands on the clock never speeding up. But finally, right on time, it's here - evening has come.


The bell at Mom and Pop's rings as Scott opens it, holding it for Katie. There are a few people already here tonight, but it's relatively quiet. Scott points to a booth back in the corner. "That looks like a good spot, he suggests."

Getting settled, he looks around, and spots Carson behind the counter. He gives a nod, acknowledging him at least.

Carson sees them and offers a little smile. Though seeing people from TJY brought on pangs within him that weren't comfortable, there was a part of him that was still glad to see them. He raises his hand for a short wave before turning back to his work.

Scott notices the bandage on Carson's forearm, but doesn't question it. Letting his eyes roam, he finds Aerith and waves at her. Picking up a menu, he scans the options. "Hmm...choices, choices." He glances over to Katie. "What are you going to have?"

Though cool on the top, under the surface, a strange tension was growing. He bounces his leg under the table, though doing his best not to let on that anything was wrong.


Kyle stops his pickup outside Misty's place and looks at his watch. He was early. Deciding to wait, he turns off the engine and settles back in his seat until it got to be closer to seven.