Purple Crayon

Just watching Ryder for a moment as he closes his own eyes Thirteen can feel her pulse rising. She'd been ordered to close her eyes for many differnt reasons before, but this time it was Ryder asking and she new there was nothing to fear of him and Trooper was close by.

Slowly closing her eyes Thirteen keeps her hands in Ryder's as she just listens to him talk. Book's Thirteen new what books where, she had read a few herself.

Continuing to keep her eyes close images start to form in her mind as memories of the books she read trying to come out and have her remember how it felt. Finally the images come faster and faster. It was hard to land on just one, but finally her mind starts to slow as her lips move in a soft voice.

"The one where the girl has a fairy Godmother and she helps her dress up nice to go to the ball and steal the Princes heart. She went from being loved, to be nothing, to wanting her love again."

Thirteen is quiet for a moment as her mind forms a more real reply this time. Things like that only happend in books and she new it. But it was a nice book she read and maybe one of her fav.

"I also like the book with the boy who had a purple crayon. He could draw anything and go there. The beach, a fair and than at the end he was still in the safty of his room. Thats what I wish I could do."

As Kyle helps her stand Alice gives a small giggle. She would never tire of Kyle, and his energy. It what helped drive her on and keep her own tank from running low.

Yelling after him she heads to the grill a smile on her face and the twinkle in her eye so bright.

"You better hurry up so I dont have to come looking for you. Because if I do than that means I will need the energy and I will have to eat your food too."

Listing to Laura Nate dosnt say much but keeps a look on his face like he was listing, digesting, and trying to understand what she was saying.

Some of the stuff maybe he new she was going to say and some of the other stuff was kind of a saprise. Like finding out Laura was going to be quiting the Elite. That wasnt something he exspected at all. Nate had always though it was her life and it was new news she would be quiting.

Continuing to listen Nate can feel his insides shout for job and feel the smile that wanted to break free but he willed it not to and kept his expression the same.

As Laura finished up Nate still stood there his arms crossed as he looked into her eyes searching to see if what she said was really how she felt. Feeling her hand on his face Nate closed his eyes for a moment. Taking in the wormth from it. Oh how he missed her touch, and her sweet soft skin.

Opening his eyes once again Nate unfolded his arms and reached up to take her hand from his face just holding it for a moment.

"All I want, is you to be you nothing more."

Saying nothing more Nate tugs a little on Laura's arm pulling him closer to her a tiny tear glittered in his eye as he closed tham again and holding her close his lips met hers.

Over the last month how he missed her, how he missed her kiss, when he saw her he wanted to hold her and now, now he had her and she was going to be his wife. His kiss alone sealed the deal to let Laura know he still wanted her oh so bad.

Slipping his hand behind her head his kiss was soft, but at moment getting just a little more intence as his passion flowed though them only to return to being soft again. Oh how he had been waitin for this.

Take your time

Jason's head shoots up, his eyes widening. He stares at Katie's motionless form. Was his mind playing tricks on him? No... he could feel it... emotions had been returned. The emotions that flowed from him had been returned in a gentle package that only he could understand.

His heart quickened and he moved to sit on the edge of the bed, taking Katie's hand in his. He bends to kiss it, a tear falling onto her skin. She was not yet awake... not yet.

It won't be okay until you come back to us... I love you too.

Reaching down, he moves a strand of hair from her face, the back of his hand softly brushing her cheek.


Silence rules the room for several long moments. Ryder hadn't really expected any more than the answer Thirteen had given him, but maybe he had hoped. He felt badly... but it was more than that. He pitied the young woman before him... but it was more than that.

"Dreams don't have to find us," he mentions softly. "We have to find them."

Propping himself up on one elbow, he cocks his head, seeing Thirteen's face from a back angle. What would it take? What was the key? It was there... right in front of his nose... but what was it? He was running out of time.

It's another several quiet minutes before he suddenly swings his legs off the bed and crosses them to lower himself down in front of Thirteen. Taking her hands in his, he forces her to uncurl, searching for her face. "Close your eyes," he directs. "Go on." To help, he closes his own eyes. "Now I want you to forget about everything that's happened. I don't want you to think about home, I don't want you to think about the Agency, I don't want you to think about here. Nothing exists but you... just you."

He waits for a moment, letting the quiet settle. "Now, you're in a new room. And in this room are shelves full of books. But they're not ordinary books. They're books that when you open them, they come to life and take you anywhere you want to go or make you anything you want to be. There's books that go to Africa. There's books that can make you a teacher or an astronaut or a cook, or a stay at home mom... anything you could ever want to be. There's books that go to Canada... or the mountains... or the city... or a field where there's nothing but grass and birds singing."

Another pause. Ryder keeps Thirteen's hands in his, letting the imagery take place, if only in the mind. "Now... which book would you choose? Maybe you want to try a couple, and that's okay. Because you can leave any book you want to at any time. Nothing is forever. But what would you choose? Which book are you drawn to?"


Kyle laughs and scrunches his nose. "I guess that means I have to get up, huh?" He heaves a sigh. "Oh, alright... since my booboo is all better, I think I have the strength to stand up again."

Shifting his weight, he manges to sit up and roll until he's standing, then offers Alice a hand up as well. "Melady... I shall escort you to the grill."

"Hey knight in not-so-shining-armor," Chloe quips, "Why don't you go get Hunter from the bus? I don't think he heard that the food was ready."

Kyle looks to Alice forlornly. "If only this moment could have lasted. But alas... duty calls." Kissing her hand, he bounds off towards the bus, leaving the others as they start to get their hamburgers.


Laura pulls into herself a little as the towel is placed around her shoulders. She was colder than she thought, being wet, then coming into an air-conditioned home. For a moment, her arms long for Nate's hand to stay, but they're disappointed as he draws back, simply handing her the phone.

She stares at it, not turning around. Hearing him walk away, she bites her quivering lip. She didn't know what she was supposed to do. She knew what her heart wanted. Having this many weeks to sit and think, she'd changed a lot of things and she knew now what she wanted. But how was she supposed to tell Nate? He wasn't coming back to her this time... he wasn't running after her and begging her return like he had in the past. Not that she deserved that... she knew that she didn't, and she wouldn't want to expect it at all. But even so, he was breaking pattern, and she didn't know how to respond.

Finally she just dials Con's number, feeling rather numb. As the line rings, she can hear Nate and Maggie in the kitchen. She missed his voice... he laughed... she missed that laughter too. She heard Maggie laugh. She missed that innocent smile and the little friend she'd made. She missed doing things with the both of them. She missed it all.

"Hello?"

Laura snaps back to attention. It was the second time Con had said "hello" and by now he was probably worried he wasn't hearing the other end. "Yes... sorry... it's me."

"Laura? What's up?"

"Um, well... my car broke down and... I could use a lift."

"That's not good. You want me to come look at it, or have you called a tow truck?"

"No, I haven't called the shop yet... Thought maybe you could look at it, if you had time. Last time it did this, you figured out the problem and I didn't have to take it in."

"Yeah. I got time now. Where are you."

"I'm... well my car is down the street from Nate's... I had to come use his phone because I forgot to charge the battery in mine and..." Laura pauses, hearing the voices in the kitchen again. Her heart ached. "Con?"

"Yes?"

"Take your time, okay?"

There's a slight pause. "I just remembered Jamie wanted me to run down to the pet store to pick up something for Ed. So... it might take me a while to get there. Say an hour or so?"

Laura can't help a small smile. She had the best brother in the world. "That'll do. And Con?"

"Yeah?"

"Thank you." Hitting the end button, Laura sighs deeply. Now she had no choice but to wait it out here. She'd pushed herself in the corner this time, and all she could do was battle her way out again. And the only way to do that was to take a deep breath, buck up and face what she was afraid of.

She sets the phone down and dries herself off enough that at least she won't be dripping all over the place. Removing her wet shoes, she walks quietly on the carpet to hang the towel back up in the bathroom, then aims for the kitchen.

Reaching the doorway, she catches Nate's attention, motioning him into the living room, if he would. She gives Maggie just a little wave, not wanting to pull her away from her fun at the oven.

Retreating into the kitchen, Laura paces a little before turning around to face Nate once again, Her hands go into her pockets, her shoulders slouched a little. "Con's gonna come pick me up," she informs quietly. "In... a while. I, um... thought..." Her eyes can't help but drift downward and she makes a little pattern in the carpet with her socked toe. She wanted things to go back to normal again... she wanted everything just to be the same again. But they couldn't be.

Before she can stop it, her emotions start to waver once more. "I thought I could try to... talk... or..." She shakes her head, trying to find the right words. "...tell you, rather, that I... I just... it's... I mean I've been thinking a lot is all and.... and it's just... um.. I mean... I've thought and... and I... well, I..."

A tear escapes and she swipes it away quickly, forcing herself to look back up at Nate and bite her lip before she cried any more. Her face grows more hot as she searches his gaze, knowing that she sounded like a complete fool. She just needed to say it. Taking a deep breath, she nodded, mustering up all of her courage. "Alright... you're right. It shouldn't have taken me a stupid car to get all the way over here. But I was scared." She swallows hard. "I was scared because I knew that I'd finally pushed you too far. I was stupid and I didn't realize that I was pushing you away. That whole ridiculous thing with Ryder was just that - ridiculous. I... I didn't mean anything by it, but I know that isn't an excuse. I should have been more careful, and I should have paid more attention to you... to us, rather than getting chummy with Ryder. I didn't realize he really was trying to win me over... I was just... stupid, I guess, enjoying the fact that I wasn't afraid of another man, after what happened with Bryce."

Heaving a sigh, Laura sees how silly she's been for not having said all of this sooner. The more she talked, the easier it got. "And then... well, I knew I'd done it, and I knew I'd pushed you too far. So... I was scared to try and come back. At first I was just mad at you for not understanding, and for blowing your top... then the more I thought about it, the more I realized how much you must have loved me for putting up with me at all up until that point."

She shrugs lamely. "By the time I realized all that, I was afraid you'd reject me if I tried coming back. I knew you loved me, but... even so, everything's been my fault all along... so I guess every time I wanted to turn down this street, I changed my mind... because I was too afraid of you telling me it was over for good."

Laura takes a deep breath, trying to collect her thoughts. She knew she was throwing a lot at Nate at once, and all quite unexpectedly. But now that she'd started, there wasn't much reason to stop. She might as well just keep right on going since she had enough guts at the moment.

Swinging her arms a little, she shifts her weight, proving that though she was determined to keep talking, it still wasn't easy. Her cheeks remain flushed.

"After... well, after all of that nonsense, and spending time away from you, I realized what I really wanted. I've... I've already talked to Reese, and I'm resigning from my position at TJY." Pursing her lips, she nods. "I'll still be working for the Elite, but the police station downtown would like to have a firearms instructor on board from our branch. Though I haven't gone to school for it, I already tested well enough and I'm it. So... three afternoons a week, I'll spend downtown instead of at TJY, and I'll be bringing home almost as much money. That, um... it frees up a lot of my time for... well..."

She pauses again. She hadn't given Nate room to say anything, but that was okay with her at this point. "I guess I'll have more time for the bike rides I've wanted to take, and maybe going back to school so I can help out with the art class at the grade school here in town. Or..."

It was then, that the tears rose again, even though she fought them. She sniffs and takes a step closer to Nate. "I know I haven't been all you've wanted me to be. And I know I've hurt you. And I know that... that there's so much that I keep messing up and I just can't seem to get it right. But... what I'd like to do instead of the bike rides and teaching...."

She swallows the lump in her throat and timidly reaches out to cradle Nate's face with her hand. Her thumb runs along his cheek, her palm trembling. "I... At this point, I don't know if you'll turn me away or not. But... but if you still want to... after all I've put you through... I... I'd really rather spend my spare time here... to... to help Maggie and make her smile... and to be your... be your wife."

Another tear rolls down her face. She meant it. Oh, with all her heart, she meant every word. "I've only got one life to live, Nate Driers..." Her voice quivers. "And I don't want to miss out on any more than I already have. You deserve a wife... and the family you've always wanted... and I love you so much that I just want to give it to you and make you happy if there's any way I can."

She sucks in her breath, almost choking. She was so scared, but so willing. "I'm terrified," she admits. "I don't know how I can be who you deserve and... and be a wife... and I don't know, a mother?" She almost laughs, hardly believing that she was saying such a thing. "But... but for you... for you, I'm ready to try."

She tries to smile, not having a clue if she was making sense at all. But she did feel ready... ready for whatever future was ahead of them. Everything she was saying had been running through her mind for weeks... and finally God had told her that it was time. But was it too late? "If you... if you've had enough though and... and don't want me any more then... then I'll walk away and... and I won't bring it up again."

Her hand still rests against his face, her whole body trembling now. She wasn't sure if it was from the cold, or all from her nerves. But she waits... she gazes into Nate's eyes and waits.

Embarrassed

Some say the odds can be broken and love can make it through everything. To these two so many things had happend and changed for them, that the non normal was now normal. What would be another thing added to the list right.

Though her body remained still and quiet, her eyes closed to the world as her body healed. A few emotions sliped at feeling a bit of Jason's sadness.

No hand reached out and took his, no words were spoken from her lips but the silent words would be enough for Jason she new it.

It's going to be ok J. I love you!

Exiting the room for a bref moment Nate goes into the bathroom to grap a towel and than the cordless phone.

Coming back behind Laura he places the towel on her shoulder as he whispers.

"I love you to Laura, you know that. I'm just sorry it had to take a car to get you to come over here."

Nate's words choked in his mouth but he couldnt help the small squezing on his heart. He'd at least hoped Laura had been on her way down the street to see him, but she had just said she didnt know why.

Bring his one hand around to the front he hands Laura the phone before taking a few steps back and letting out a small sigh.

"If you need anything else I'm in the kitchen with Maggie baking."

Turning Nate heads back down the hall and into the kitchen where his sister was waiting.

Thirteen gives a shake of her head to Ryder's comment. She didnt mind being here, she liked it. It felt safe and her friends where here.

Bringing her legs close to her chest she wraps her arms around her legs and rests her head on them. She didnt know if it would always be like this and she didnt understand why Ryder didnt just let her stay here. It was hard to think of what life outside this room was like. She had been out a few times but they never ended well. Her voice was still a small whisper.

"But I like it here, its safe and no one can hurt me here."

Looking over to Ryder her eyes now held something new but there was still the fear deep in them. She wanted to try and be out more, she wanted to try and go places with Ryder but ever time she tryed she only embarrassed him and though he didnt say it she saw how people looked at her.

Thinking on his question for a long moment Thirteen keeps her chin resting on her knee as she looked at the ground. Looking up at Ryder again a sadness was in Thirteen's eyes. She new what dreams where, and she new what hopes where but she had not.

"I don't have a dream. When I was at home it was all I new anything outside of it was nothing but what the told me. Empty, scairy and a place that would turn there back on me. Dreams...they dont find there way to people like me."

Laughing with the others Alice is seated on a blanket catching some shade after being in the sun for a whole playing with the other. Her eyes widen just a little as she see the frisbee aiming right for Kyle.

Opening her mouth to say something it was to late as it calides with his head. Sitting there stunned for a moment Alice's mouth just hand open as she looks down at Kyle in her lap. Finally letting a laugh slip out she looks down at Kyle her place giving play to her eyes as they sparkled.

"A nurse huh? I often have been known to dr up a few booboos but those were for three year olds. Think I can handle this one too?"

Shaking her head slightly she leans into Kyle a little more bringin her hand to his head brushing some of his hair out of the way just to take a playful look. Squinting her eyes her smile shone as she looks down into his eyes.

"I think I can handle that."

Bending a little more she gives his head where he pointed a kiss before pulling away and kissing the tip of his nose and than sitting up again.

Giving another laugh Alice bumps her legs a little bit and makes Kyle's head bounce.

"Food can make any man better huh?"

Looking up at where the group was gathering for burger and than back down at Kyle again her hands brush through his hair.

"I wouldnt mind, but that means I wouldnt get up and I dont think anyone else is going to serve us."

Not in public

Jason doesn't mean to be disrespectful. He did respect Rosetta and Jay both. But he simply couldn't return the same feelings for letting Katie go.

"No... I don't know as well as you do that's what she'd want," he states quietly but firmly.

He appreciated Rosetta's hand on his, but it did little to ease the pain. "Katie wasn't done living yet... Not to sound selfish, but she didn't know I could physically survive without her either... I know she's hanging on... I know she's going to wake up."

Jason retreats into his stubbornness, unwilling to let go.

Come on, Katie... they're not going to wait much longer. I can't go on without you... don't let them make that decision, please...


Ryder sighs a little. He reaches over to teasingly tug Thirteen's hair. "We all gotta face our fears sometime, ay?"

Trooper gives a little moan and flops over onto his side then rolls over, scratching his own back as his legs go every whichway. Scooting away a little bit, he kicks his hind legs out, enjoying the carpet, but doesn't seem to realize he's close to one of the little tables with a lamp on it. One of his massive paws whacks the table leg with enough force to make the whole thing shake. The lamp doesn't have a chance. Thankfully, the carpet is a soft landing, but it still lands with a bang, also sending several magazines flying.

Startling himself, Trooper is on his feet in an instant, looking at what he did and trying to figure out how it had happened.

"Trooper!" Ryder isn't upset, just mildly annoyed, but amused at the same time. "You're too big for this room."

Trooper wags his tail and ducks his head sheepishly, going to hide beside Thirteen, giving her face a nice slobbery kiss before sitting down on his haunches and looking towards the door as if he's back on duty.

"Sure. Can't clean up your own mess, can you?" Ryder shakes his head and gets up to put the items back on the table. Once he's done, he goes to the unoccupied bed and flops down on his stomach, his head near Thirteen's. Tucking his hands under his chin, he looks down at her for a long moment. "I know you're scared. The world is a big, scary place. But you won't be alone. I'm never far away, and neither is anyone else here. You don't want to spend the rest of your life in this room, do ya, hmm?"

Giving another sigh, Ryder rolls over on his back and looks up at the ceiling. He couldn't beat around the bush with Thirteen anymore. Whether she was ready or not, the hard truth remained. "If Reese doesn't start to see some results, he's going to have you taken away... and wherever you go, I'm not going to be there and neither is Trooper. You're a smart woman, Thirteen... Even if you were kept locked away, you know there's more out there for you... and you know you weren't meant to live like this."

He turns his face, seeing the back of Thirteen's head. She really had come a long ways, even if Reese couldn't see it. She was cleaned up, her eyes were brighter and she was getting just a little bit more healthy meat on her bones. She wasn't so pale, and Ryder wasn't so surprised anymore when she smiled. If only he could help her not be so afraid to walk outside.

Two weeks ago had been the first time he'd gotten her outside of the building, and a speeding firetruck had induced a panic attack that had put them right back to square one. Even though the Agency obviously had her outside before, just taking a walk was quite a task, and Ryder hadn't even attempted anything like the library or grocery store. He didn't think it was necessarily the outdoors itself that scared Thirteen... but just that it was so different from where she'd lived all her life. Whether it was inside or out, she'd never been away from it, so being around a whole new set of people and surroundings... it was probably terrifying. Thirteen was simply comfortable and content inside and tucked safely into her own room.

Ryder is quiet for a few moments, letting his words sink in. "What do you want the most, Thirteen? There has to be something. What's the dream you have inside your heart?"


Laura whirls around at the sound of Nate's voice, her eyes going wide. Saying she was surprised to see him would have been a stupid thing to say, but the thought did cross her mind.

Realizing her mouth was hanging open, she clamps it shut. She could already feel the heat rising to her face, despite the chill that the cold rain had brought on. "Um no... I mean yes, no... or..." Giving Nate a lame look, she gives up and simply comes inside. She doesn't go much farther than few feet. Already, a puddle of rainwater was forming on the tiled entrance and she didn't want to get the carpet wet.

Turning to Nate, her eyes don't want to meet his, and instead, wind up somewhere near the floor. "My car sorta died and my cell phone is dead too so I couldn't call anybody and I don't even know why I was on this street in the first place, I missed a corner or something, all I was doing was heading to the store for a few things so I'd actually have food in the house tomorrow and I guess my mind was too occupied with other things or something so I wasn't pay attention to where I was going, and then it had to be raining which was just great, and I left my umbrella at home because I didn't know it was going to do this and..."

She stops abruptly, realizing that she was totally rambling and she wasn't even sure why. Glancing up at Nate, she swallows hard, blinking back the rain that was dripping down from her hair. "Um... yeah. ...Hi."

The heat remained in her cheeks and grew even worse. The two feet between her and Nate was killing her. She shifts her weight a little nervously. She was supposed to be asking to use the phone. Her eyes catch his. Yes... the phone... she needed to.... how she missed those eyes.

Before she realizes what she's doing, Laura's hand is near Nate's face, her fingers running lightly down his cheek and jaw line. He looked older somehow... tired. She wondered if she wore the same marks.

Withdrawing quickly, she glances down, stuffing her hands in her wet pockets. She needed to call Con. But somehow, the words to ask Nate if she could use his phone got stuck under the lump that had risen in her throat. And what were these? Tears? Why did she feel like crying?

"I'm sorry," she mumbles, turning back towards the door. "I should just go and.... I'll walk, or... no..." She swivels back around. It was silly to leave now that she was here. But she didn't like the strange sensations she was feeling. She aims for the door again. "I shouldn't have come, I'm sorry, I just, I..." She stops again, looking out at the rain. Walking in the storm would be stupid.

As if being pushed, she turns around one more time, almost making herself dizzy. Like being drawn by a magnet, her eyes can't help but rise to Nate's again. The words spill out of her mouth before she can stop them. "I miss you so much."

Some kind of a laugh is choked out as a tear mingles in with the rain that was still running down her face. "I love you, and it took a silly broken car to get me to come." She raises her arms and lets them fall against her sides in surrender. "All I wanted was to use the phone until I saw you and then I... I... I remembered what I wanted even more."

Wondering if Nate thought she'd lost her mind completely, Laura turns around one more time, her face to the door. She didn't even know if Nate even wanted her back in his life, and she felt utterly ridiculous in this state, saying the things she just had. Where was her head? What was she thinking?!


"Farther, farther!" Chloe shouts between laughs as she watches Heath run after the frisbee she'd just thrown. "Oh, oh oh..." More laughter comes as Heath dives for the flying disc, only to miss and go sprawling onto the park grass.

"Someone needs to work on their aim!" Jordan shouts.

Heath sits up from a distance away and shakes some grass out of his hair. "I'm okay! Thanks for asking!"

Break Out had hit another stop on their route and with three days off, they'd decided to splurge on a hotel and have some fun. A cookout in a nearby park was just the thing. The day was gorgeous and warm and surprisingly there was hardly anybody else around, leaving almost the whole park to the small group.

"Five minutes for the burgers!" Myla shouts from the grill.

"Woo!" Kyle comes running back from the water fountain just in time to get bonked in the head by the frisbee that had been thrown by Shawn this time... and quite off target.

Kyle blinks and staggars to where the blanket was spread out and falls down in a heap, landing his head in Alice's lap. "I'm injured!" he wails, putting a hand to his head. "I need a nurse." He stares up at Alice, a cheesy grin on his face, his eyes dancing.

Humor ran thicker than ever, and the team drew closer and closer together as friends. Alice had become such a part of the team that they often joked about not being able to survive without seeing her jeep behind the bus. The only tension was between Hunter and Kyle. Only Hunter knew exactly when it had started, but he tried to hide it. The others were too smart though, and had picked up on it quickly. It was obvious to everyone that he and Kyle were not getting along. There were never harsh words, but Jordan often broke up petty bickering. When asked why they were suddenly at odds though, neither man would give an answer. Hunter would go his way and Kyle his. Onstage they got along fine, but it was apparent that their friendship was being strained. Hunter was the reason Kyle had come... but something had happened.

Otherwise, during the last month, things had been going without a hitch. The team was doing well, raising well over their goals for finances, and even booking several more stops for their trip. At this point, it looked like they would be on the road through Thanksgiving before returning home for a winter break.

Kyle squints in the sunlight. "I's hurt right here." He points to the side of his head where there was no mark at all from the frisbee. "Will you kiss it to make it all better?"

It was no secret that Kyle and Alice had become more than friends during their trip. Though getting teased every once in a while, it was kept casual. If no one payed close attention to them holding hands or sitting closer together, most would think they were still just the same best friends as before. Only when spending time alone did romance show through, and Kyle would often make a joke out of the fact that he didn't kiss in public.

"Who wants cheese on their burgers?" Myla calls out.

Kyle's eyes widen. "Me!" He raises his hand, but stays lying down. "I think I just got all better. But I'm too comfortable to move." Still grinning, he eyes Alice teasingly. "Can I just stay here while we eat?"

Not Giving Up

Giving a sigh Rosetta just shakes her head. She felt bad for Jason and new his pain. Almost losing people was something she dealt with so much.

They had tried to stop the chain and still it continued to the next generation. They had tried so hard and still it continued like it always did.

"Ok, one week but than we need to start thinking what Katie would really want in this whole thing."

Entering the room again Rosetta walks over to the bed and gentily sad down in the chair next to Jason. Resting her chin in her hands Rosetta lets out a small sigh.

She keeps her voice calm as she talks to Jason. Knowing how he was feeling she could sympathies.

"We wouldnt be giving up on her Jason. Only letting her go so she could be at peace. You know as well as we do its what Katie would want."

Rosetta lets out a small sigh as her hand takes Jason's and give it a squeeze.

"Continue to pray Jason, Jay is giving her a week."

Staying curled on the ground with Trooper Thirteen smiles a little when she see Ryder. Though his visits came less often she still always looked forward to them.

Hearing Ryder's question again Thirteens nerves jump again as her hand fidgest picking at a lose string on the blanket. She always got nervouse on this topic. She was happy here she didnt want to leave.

"I'm..not locked up though. You keep the door unlocked Ryder and...I..like it here, and I dont want me to meet new people..."

Thirteen hugged herself a little closer she was a little scaired on this topic.

"...I dont like it out there, it scairs me."

Standing in the doorway for a long moment in his bear feet, jeans with the wriped knees and his red sweater Nate knows Laura dosnt relize he is there. Not saying anything he just listens, contemplates, and watchs her his heart not fluttering like it normaly would have but holding no ill will twords her or anger it was good to see her non the less.

Finally leaning aganst the door frame with his arms cross Nate gives a small laugh as he shakes his head, his eyes giving a bit of a twinkle that was still left hidding in them somewhere.

"Are you going to stand there and grumple to yourself in the rain all afternoon or are you going to come in and dry off?"

Nate pushes off the door frame and stands back opening the door just a little more to let Laura in if she liked. The smell of fresh backed good wafed through the air like some goodies had just been made.

BJ gives a small nod to Mick even though he new the sadness was still there. He only hoped that Katie would be ok.

"I will keep praying for her Dadda."

Curling up a little more in Mick's lap BJ rests his head on Mick's chest while he leans back his arms wraped around him in a tight embrace trying to comfrort his dad the best he could.

"I hope she will be ok and I hope Mom comes home soon. I miss her."

Unexpected Visit... Unvoiced Longing

Jason is fully aware of his friends coming and going, and is grateful for each and every visit. Even so, he remains quiet, not saying much, and barely responding to them. Hope was slipping through his fingers, and each day, despair knocked louder on the door to his heart.

Downing a couple sugar pills, he sits back in the chair and continues to watch, wait and pray. He couldn't have an episode - physical or mental - now... not when he had no hero to rescue him. He could feel negative emotions getting backed up like water being forced not to flow as it hit a dam. He was doing it on purpose... he would not release them until Katie was awake... until she could handle it... until she needed those emotions, whether they were negative or not. Unfortunately, it was starting to wear on him. He knew it was dangerous, and he could feel the emotions starting to work on his mind as they tried to provoke images from the past to arise. But so far he had kept them at bay.

Katie, come home... please.

Thunder rolls outside. The jarring sound brings his thoughts back to his surroundings. Hearing voices in the hall, Jason cocks his head. Rosetta had been there for a while now and spent most of her time here with Jay. Today's conversation sounded different though...

Jason slowly rises and walks quietly to the door.


Jay turns away from Rosetta as she speaks. He knew what she was saying... and he knew it would come up. But it still tore at his heart like nothing else. A fresh tear surfaces. These past few weeks had been murder and he was growing tired. Was his sister right?

Turning back around, he locks eyes with Rosetta for a moment. "How can it be right? She could wake up any moment and.... and the doctor says there is still brain activity. I... I just... I already lost a wife and a son... I can't lose her too."

He swallows hard, his eyes begging his sister for any kind of comfort. The silence between them has a voice of its own, and the cold, hard truth could not be stopped. "But... I can't stand watching her suffer either." His shoulders drop. "Maybe it's time."

"Don't you even think about it."

Jay's head snaps up to Jason's voice. The younger man stands in the doorway, his arms crossed as if guarding the room. "Oh, Jason..." Jay sighs and shakes his head. "I'm sorry. But-"

"There is no but," Jason snaps. He glares between Jay and Rosetta both. "If you want to give up, then why don't you two just leave now?" A crack of thunder seems to seal his anger.

"It's not like that. You know-"

"All I know is that Katie's not dead yet." Jason can feel the heat rising to his face as his emotions boil inside of him. If he wasn't careful, someone could get hurt. He looks to Rosetta, his bloodshot eyes showing his desperation. Glancing back to Jay, his voice comes out as a threat. "You make that decision and you'll find out just what kind of damage I can do."

Jay sighs, trying to stay calm, and knowing that Jason was under a huge emotional burden. "Jason, don't talk like that. Just calm down and be realistic. What would Katie-"

"Think if we abandoned her?" Jason's eyes narrow. "Be it on your head." Spinning on his heel, he stalks back into the room, resuming his place in the chair.

Jay moans and paces a small circle, putting his head in his hands. "I can't do it... I just can't do it." He stops to look at Rosetta again. "One more week... just one more week."


Ryder dashes through the rain into TJY, pocketing the keys to the car he'd finally been able to buy. Heading down through the cubicles, he sees that most people are gone for the evening. He was a little later tonight. But he was trying to wean Thirteen from him just a bit. It was hard... it was taking longer to introduce her to life outside the Agency than he thought it would. He wouldn't mind, if Reese wasn't breathing down his neck about it. The young woman had such a sweet and innocent heart though... Ryder knew she had never wronged another person on purpose. If only she would learn to trust other people. For now though, it was still just him and Trooper. Even Rick hadn't been allowed into the small circle. Susanne was closer - Ryder figured it was because she was a woman, but there was still leeriness there on Thirteen's part.

Rapping his knuckles on the spare room door, Ryder waits a moment, giving Thirteen time to get herself together if need be, before he enters. Glancing down, he sees her with Trooper, and he gives a wry grin. "Are you ever going to sleep in bed like a normal person?" he teases.

Sighing from the long day, he lets himself in all the way, and flops down on the floor near Thirteen, his head resting back against the bed. He saw the remnants from supper and was glad that she'd eaten most of the lasagna that he'd fixed for her.

"Have you thought any more about staying somewhere else?" he asks. The last time he'd brought that up, Thirteen had panicked, but he tried to stay casual about it this time around. Slow and steady... that's what it woudl take, and he had the patience for it.

Grinning, he turns his head towards her. "You're too pretty to stay locked up all the time. You need to get out... meet more people. I know Reese isn't sure what will happen with you, but if you're let go, then you deserve better than this."


"No! No, no, no!" Laura wails and lets her head fall forward onto her steering wheel. The pouring rain was loud against her windsheild, but the vehicle was going nowhere.

"You big piece of junk!" Laura smacks her hand on the dashboard, but knows it won't do any good. She stares out into the rain and feels thunder shake the car. Her umbrella was at home. After Ryder had left, she'd decided to head for the store for some groceries. It wasn't until she'd left the driveway that the rain had started, and it had been coming down by the bucketfull ever since. And it wasn't until about forty seconds ago that she had discovered her cell phone battery was run completely down.

She'd missed her turn at one of the stop signs. She didn't know why... her mind just must have been somewhere else. But as a result, she'd ended up on this street. Why this street? Couldn't it have been any other street?

She groans. She thought she could hear God laugh during the next roll of thunder. "Yeah, you think this is pretty funny, don't you? I haven't had the guts to come here myself, so You decided You'd just get me here yourself. But did it have to be in the middle of this weather?!"

Laura grabs a few things from her purse to put in her pockets then takes a deep breath before getting out of her broken-down car. It would just have to sit here on the shoulder for a little while.

Jogging up onto the sidewalk, she sprints through the rain, running the half-block before turning up the familiar paved walk. Reaching the porch, she tries to catch her breath. She was soaked from head to toe, her dripping hair just adding to her drenched state.

Another little wail escapes her lips as she stares at the doorbell. Maybe he wouldn't even be home. No, his car was in the driveway. Well maybe he'd...

Laura stops thinking and just reaches out to press the doorbell. All she needed was to use the phone or a ride or something. Even though she and Nate hadn't been dating lately it wasn't like they were enemies. She knew he wouldn't leave her stranded. But just being here... like this... and knowing the things that had been running through her mind lately...

Waiting, she turns around to look out at the rain, her focus drifting to God again. "If You think I'm going to tell him now, then you're sorely mistaken," she mentions aloud, folding her arms stubbornly. With her back to the door, she forgets to listen for Nate, not knowing when or if it opened. "I know he's still mad at me so You can just forget it... there's no way... and besides, I.. I... I... well I don't know what." She growls at the clouds. "You could have sent me over here on a sunny day," she grumbles.


Crack.
Scott jumps, knocking over the bottle of paint and spilling it all over his desk. "Awww....." Domino whines and looks up at him as a drop of blue lands on her head.

"Yeah, sorry." Scott reaches down to clean her off, then sets about to clean up the rest of the mess he'd made.

"You alright?" Gunner asks, wandering across the living room.

"Yeah, yeah..." Scott sighs. "Just... jumpy."

"Isn't letting up either. I think the storm system stalled out over the top of us."

"Great." Scott couldn't help it that every time he heard thunder, for just an instant, his mind thought it was a gunshot. Picking up a small stack of papers, he was glad to see they hadn't gotten paint on them. Tucking them into a folder, he keeps the handwritten letters safe. "Did Carson say anything to you today?"

Gunner shakes his head. "Didn't see him. He's been swamped at Mom and Pop's this week so he hasn't been in to the office that I know of. Heard Mable was back on the job down there and I guess Herb was helping with some light work too. Carson says he still doesn't want to expand though... wants to keep it small. Guess he didn't want to have to hire out, but I see he's got his sister working a bit now during busy hours. Suppose that's his business, though I don't know how the place can run with just one cook. Dani and Aerith must help out back there as much as they waitress..."

Scott only half listens as Gunner rambles about Mom and Pop's. Carson had still found nothing. If nothing turned up within the next few weeks, he knew that the inevitable would happen.... his job at TJY would be terminated.


Mick stares down at BJ, his own eyes filling with sadness. He didn't have an answer. Taking a deep breath, he sets aside the work he was doing, and sits down on a bale of hay, inviting the boy to sit on his knee. Putting an arm around him, he ruffles his thick red hair, then takes his bandanna and wipes a dirt smudge off BJ's cheek.

"I don't know," he finally answers. "But if Katie goes to be with God... she will be very happy. Heaven is a happy place."

Leaning his head back against the wall, he tries to be strong in front of his adopted son. Even so, he knew that BJ would sense his own sorrow. The boy was a little slow in some areas of learning, but one thing he possessed was a heart that could feel other people's joy or sadness.

Mick gives him a light backrub. "And if we obey and follow God like we've been teaching you... then we will see her again one day. She won't be gone forever." He pauses, forcing a smile. "But keep praying, okay?"

Time

Time...oh time how is always comes back to that one thing. Something that moves so fast, making the days go by but at the same time feels so slow.

Time...do we have enough of it to finish in life what we started, to walk our full path or will God decied that now is the time for us to be with him.

Time...we often take it for granted untill we get halted in place and showed just how little time we really do have. Another day, another hour, another minute, another second and so time moves on waiting for no one not even those who tryed to grasp onto it the most.

Resting a hand on her brother shoulder tear plaged Rosetta's eyes once more as her daily visit came to a close and she met her brother in the hall way.

So many questions hung in the air, and so much hurt was passed around no matter how much they tryed to turn there pain over to God there was still some that lingered.

The question of what would happen next always hung in the air, though they tryed to dart around it for a long time now it would come sooner or later and though Rosetta hated to be the one to bring it up she new she had to, for Katie's sake.

"You know she wouldnt want to continue on like this Jay. Its a hard desition to make and I have we have been trying not to bring it up for weeks, but we both know Katie would want use to let her go so she could go home."

Rosetta hated the look on her brother face, and though those words had made new tears form she had to. Katie was a fighter, and never backed down, but she wouldnt want to be kept alive by equipment eather.

It had been a month, and they wernt giving up just simply setting her free so she could be home, and see her brother and mother again. Rosetta new it was what Katie would have wanted.

Mama wipe the blood off of my face
I can't see through it anymore
I need someone to talk to, and a new hiding place
I feel like I'm looking at heaven's door

Knock, knock, knockin' on heaven's door
Knock, knock, knockin' on heaven's door
Knock, knock, knockin' on heaven's door
Knock, knock, knockin' on heaven's door

Laying a hand on his friends shoulder Nate held a paper bag in his hand. He'd spend most of his time away from the office in the last few weeks doing work Reese needed down outside. Going to court, collecting evadince from Brown and stuff of that nature but never did his mind drift away from his friends.

Worry corsed in his eyes for more than one reason. Things didnt feel the same anymore. So much was changing and non of it was for the good.

Setting the bag down on the table next to Jason Nate gave his shoulder a gentil pat.

"She'd kick your butt if she new you wernt eating right. I can almost hear her voice saying it too. There is an orange in there, and some stuff from Mom and Pops."

Moving slowly twords Katie Nate sits on the edge of the bed and takes her lifeless hand in his own. Tears wanted to come, but he willed them not to.

"Maggie wanted me to tell you Kat, that you have to get better soon. You promised to go fishing with her..."

Nate choked on his own words as he though about what his sister has said, and how much hope was in her eyes. She made a good example for anyone and he feared what it would be like if he had to tell her Katie wouldnt wake up.

"...you can't break your promies to her now could you? We miss you Kat."

Standing Nate leans over her and gives Katie a gentil kiss on the forhead before turning and making his way quickly to the door.

"I'll be back tomarrow Hotshot."

Mama I can hear that thunder roar
Echoin' down from God's distant shore
I can hear 'em callin' for my soul
Feel I'm knockin' on heaven's door

Knock, knock, knockin' on heaven's door
Knock, knock, knockin' on heaven's door
Knock, knock, knockin' on heaven's door
Knock, knock, knockin' on heaven's door

Placing the small bottle on the table next to Jason Misty gives him a hug just holding him for a long moment. She couldnt imagen what this must be like for him.

Things wernt the same at the office with out Katie and Jason around. They were like a beacon that gave hope to whoever came in contact with them weather the person needed it or not. Now even though the laughter could still be hurd if you listened closely caught in the halls, it was starting to fade.

"I know you havent been eating right so I thought you could use a refill."

Laying some flowers on Katie bedside Misty says nothing more. There really wasnt anything else to say to her friend that hadent been said already.

Mama take these bells out of my ears
I can't hear them anymore
They're bringin' me down and givin' me tears
Feel like I'm knockin' on heaven's door

Knock, knock, knockin' on heaven's door
Knock, knock, knockin' on heaven's door
Knock, knock, knockin' on heaven's door
Knock, knock, knockin' on heaven's door

"Daddy, is Katie going to go be with God?"

The little boy looked up at Mick with his big bright eyes wondering about his cousand. Rosetta had been gone for a while now, and every night they prayed. Though the little boy didnt know much of life and death yet, he didnt need it to be explained to much that his might never see her again.

"I dont want her to, everyone will be sad and I wont be able to see her and Jason anymore."

Mama take these tears out of my eyes
I can't see through them anymore
Just for once, I'd like to see the sunrise
Feel like I'm knockin' on heaven's door

Knock, knock, knockin' on heaven's door
Knock, knock, knockin' on heaven's door
Knock, knock, knockin' on heaven's door
Knock, knock, knockin' on heaven's door

Laying curled up on the floor Thirteen sits just petting Trooper and letting the time pass before Ryder would return.

She had done her best to try and do what Ryder said, and answer what questions she could though there was many things she still was to scaired to talk about sooner or later she new should would.

Her heart felt sad tonight though as she staired into the dark. She wasnt ment to hear it but she new Ryder's friend was not doing well. It hurt to think she had been a part of that by choose or not. Thirteen could only hope that Katie would get better soon.

And thus...

Reese's eyes widen as Angelica pushes him, and he can't help but sprint after her, towards the door. "No fair without a warning!" He hollers, the humor dancing in his voice. If anyone were to see him acting like this, they would have thought he'd gone mad. But to him... he was simply finding youth again... a youth that Angelica brought out in him.

Getting to the parking lot, he catches her by the waist and pulls her towards his car. "I win, so I drive," he teases. Yes... amidst the turmoil, there was an oasis where one could go to rest and be revived.


Seeing Thirteen sit on the floor, Ryder just looks down at her a moment, trying to figure out her behavior. He knew that she probably had some strange habits after being raised by the Agency. Deciding to join her, rather than change her routines yet, he takes the food, then slides down on the floor beside her, resting his back against the bed.

"Me, cook? Oh, I think we can manage that sometime." Unwrapping the food, he sets it between them so that she can help herself. "Though I think you'll find this tastes pretty good."

Encouraging her to eat, Ryder doesn't mention questioning or the Agency at all. Instead, he tells Thirteen a little more about the Elite, what he did, and who the people were. Maybe Reese didn't approve of is methods... but Ryder would be Thirteen's friend before he took any further steps.

And thus... the clock strikes the hour, never stopping, always turning.


It is late. Outside the sky is dark, and the stars twinkle, watching over the hours as they pass... the days as they come and go. Jason sits in the chair close to Katie’s bed, his fingers moving gently along his guitar. A new melody comes forth, soft and soothing to the ear. Though his eyes are closed, his hands feel their way on the strings, never missing a note. His voice rises quiet and mellow, the tears held back behind a wall of hope as time slips by.

You were so brave through it all,
No one could blame you now,
If you wanted to go home,
If you wanted to leave this place.

Con gives Kate’s hand a gentle squeeze as it was enveloped by his own. His touch had never been more tender. “Aw, Kat.” Left alone for a few minutes as Laura spoke with Jason in the hall, Con let the stubborn tear escape before quickly wiping it away.

“I tried to look out for you… what happened, hmm?” Another tear comes that is just as quickly smothered by his hand. “You know we can’t live without you. Things just wouldn’t be the same. I mean… who’s gonna keep everyone in line back at TJY? And… how am I supposed to go back to work for Reese without you there to always make things better?”

Con reaches out to brush Katie’s cheek. “Hang in there, Kat… for us?”

You were so strong through it all,
No one could blame you now,
If you wanted to let go,
If you wanted to leave it all behind.

Carson sits beside the bed, his hands folded in front of him. Looking at his young friend, he felt like crying, but felt too empty at the same time. The days were going by in a blur. He had so many things running through his mind, with hardly enough time to slow down. The restaurant was constantly busy, he had Reese bugging him about coming back to TJY, he and Dani were struggling not to argue all the time, and he and Misty barely had time to see each other. He was trying so hard to stay on the right path, but picking himself back up was slow. At least he'd heard nothing of Mackenzie... maybe that was truly over. Even so, he couldn't deny that there was something in the back of his heart that was saddened by that thought.

He came to visit Katie every night after work. Usually it was when Jason was stretching his legs in the hall, and the others were gone for the day. It was his one bit of peace before going home, yet there was still turmoil, seeing Katie like this. Please, God, if there’s any way…

But if there’s a chance, just a chance,
That you would stay with me,
I’ll hang on to that strand of hope,
Hoping that I’ll see…

You again. You again.
That’s what I’m prayin’ for.
You again. You again.
I couldn’t ask for more.
No, I wouldn’t ever blame you,
If you wanted to give in.
But please reconsider for me.
I just want to be with you,
Again.

“God, please heal Katie and help her to wake up again.” Mick kneels with BJ by the boy’s bed, his hands folded as the example, like every night. But tonight it had been PB&J sandwiches and cartoons instead of Rosetta’s cooking and a family game.

“And please bring Mom home safe again. Amen.” Mick gets to his feet and reaches down to swing BJ into bed, wrestling with him for a moment to bring out the giggles. Finally pulling the blanket up to the boy’s chin, Mick runs his hand through the unruly red hair, then shuts off the light for the night.

Slipping into his own bed a while later, he stares up at the dark ceiling. His hand falls to the empty side of the bed and a lump rises in his throat. Katie had been like his niece too, and he hadn’t loved her less than anyone else on the ranch. The fact that Rosetta had felt the need to go, proved that this situation was far more serious than anyone would like to admit.

Rolling over onto his side, Mick tries to sleep. Morning would come early. But it would be a long night. Please… please, God… don’t take Katie yet.

You were courageous through it all,
No one could blame you now,
If you wanted to give in,
If you wanted to call it quits.

“Still no change.” The doctor shakes his head grimly before excusing himself from the small group.

Phil, Mike and Jen enter the room slowly, Phil the first one to approach Jason. “Hey, Hotshot.”

Jason lifts his tired head, managing half a smile. “Hey, guys.” Rising to his feet is harder than he thought. He didn’t know how long he’d been sitting this time. The hours were all just running together.

Jen comes forward to give him a hug. “How ya doing… really?”

Jason returns the hug, but takes a moment to respond after he’s stepped back. “I’m okay.”

Phil gives his arm a pat. “We just wanted to come see how things were… wanted to pray with you if you would like.”

Tears spring into Jason’s eyes and he looks up to the ceiling, trying to remain composed. Biting his lip, he finally nods.

Jen puts her arm around him, giving him a squeeze. “It’s alright… we’re here for you… and God is too.”

The four join hands and Phil begins the prayer. All of their hearts were poured out to God for their friend. They knew that He knew best… but they so wanted their friend back. They knew that if He wanted to take Katie home, then that was best. But if there was any way…

You fought so hard through it all,
Now one could blame you now,
If you wanted to find rest,
If you wanted to leave it all behind.

“Jason, are you gonna go home to get some rest? You can’t be comfortable here.”

Jason shakes his head at Laura. His eyes were tired, his body was exhausted. But he wasn’t going to leave.

“Wyatt says Trooper's doing a good job with Thirteen, but he misses you.”

“Mm-hmm.” Jason really didn’t care at this point. Wyatt had been in earlier like he was every day, but hadn’t mentioned the dog’s behavior.

Laura sighs and pats his shoulder. “Want me to bring up some food?”

He only shrugs.

“I’ll take that as a yes. But it won’t be from here. I’ll pick up something from Carson from Mom and Pop’s, okay?”

Jason shrugs again, his chin still resting in his hand as his eyes stare at the lifeless form of his friend in the bed. He knew he wasn't the only one with problems. He knew that Laura and Nate were hardly even seeing each other right now, even though Laura was trying hard to hide it with a forced smile. But it was hard not to focus on what was right in front of him. This was his life before him, and it was slipping away.

But if there’s a chance, just one chance,
That you would stay for me.
I’ll hang on to that glimpse of hope,
Hoping that I’ll see…

“Mom and Dad are gonna let me come back for a visit sometime soon. Took some convincing, but… they know Axel is here, and Dad thinks it’s pretty safe around all you Elite people.” Liz gives a short laugh. “They said maybe it would be a good experience for me and… they didn’t want to deny me getting to know my brother a little better too.”

Jason sits in the hospital’s dining room, looking across the table at his sister. He nods numbly, wishing he could show a little more enthusiasm. He just didn’t have the energy. “I… I’m sorry that I haven’t been myself. I wish…”

“It’s okay,” Liz interrupts. “I understand.” She slides her hand across the table to take Jason’s hand. “I’m really glad that I got to meet you at least. I’m sorry too, that all this is happening to you. I can’t imagine what it feels like.” She takes a deep breath. “But have faith, okay? Whatever happens, God won’t let you go.”

Jason nods with a little more surety this time. “I know.”

“When this is all over… when I come back… maybe we can get to know each other?”

A faint smile quirks the corner of Jason’s mouth. “I think I’d like that.”

Liz’s own smile forms. “Somehow I’ll check back on this end to see how things are. Dad said he got your email address.”

“Yeah… yeah, I gave it to him yesterday.”

Liz studies Jason’s face for a moment. “He said he’d like to come back to visit too sometime… if you didn’t mind.”

Jason purses his lips, looking down at his water glass. “I don’t.” Lifting his eyes, he sighs. “No… I don’t mind. We said goodbye yesterday, but it was pretty brief. Tell him to stay in touch, would you? And… and I’m not angry with him anymore.”

“Okay.” Liz’s eyes smile for her. “Goodbye, Jason. We’ll all still be praying for you guys and Katie.”

You again. You again.
That’s what I’m prayin’ for.
You again. You again.
I couldn’t ask for more.
No, I wouldn’t blame you,
If you wanted to give in.
But please reconsider for me.
I just want to be with you,
Again.

“No… no change.” Jay leans back against the wall, his cell phone to his ear. It sounded good to hear his wife’s voice, but it made him miss her all the more. “No, I just feel like I should stay. We don’t know how long it could be…” He rubs his eyes wearily. “I’m not ready to make any kind of decision. Tell the kids I love ‘em. I’ll call you again later. Okay. I love you too. Bye.”

Though you’re in my arms tonight,
We’re still so far apart.
I can touch your hand, feel your breath,
But I want to feel your heart.
Please let me feel your heart again,
Don’t leave…
I just need you to be strong for me,
I just want to be with you…
Again.

Ryder sits on the narrow windowsill, his eyes watching Katie. The only movement was her breathing, though he hoped for more. Like almost everyone else from this TJY department, he came close to every day, just to see if there was anything different and to talk to Katie, hoping that maybe the voices and begging for her to come back to them would not be in vain.

His mind was often clouded with thoughts of her here. Even though his days were full. His work with Thirteen continued daily as he worked with her at becoming more secure, and winning over her friendship. Still though, she seemed to only trust him and Trooper. Reese was getting impatient, but Ryder insisted he needed more time. The little spare room had become Thirteen's haven and home, and he wasn't willing yet to take it away from her. He just needed more time... he would find some answers, he knew he would...

Pushing off the sill, Ryder walks back to the bed, reaching down to run his finger over Katie’s hand. “Hang in there, mate,” he whispers softly. He would be back tomorrow, like always.

You again. You again.
That’s what I’m prayin’ for.
You again. You again.
I couldn’t ask for more.
No, I wouldn’t blame you,
If you wanted to give in.
But please reconsider for me.
I just want to be with you,
Again.

The gentle notes slowly fade into the air and Jason’s hand comes to rest on the quiet strings once more. Every night, his voice sang a sweet and quiet melody, and every night, he hoped that when the song ended, he would be able to look into Katie’s eyes once more. But each night, hope was just a little further away.

Setting his guitar aside, Jason leans forward to rest both arms on the edge of the bed. Taking Katie’s hand in his, he buries his face against it, exhaustion having taken its toll. The days had gone by… it didn’t feel like several weeks had passed, but they had. The world was going on around him, but he refused to live outside of this room. If Katie was stuck here, so was he.

Oh, Katie… how much longer? I can’t bear to see you like this any more. I don’t know how long I can last. You’re there… I know you can feel me again… all I want is to feel you too… but all there is is emptiness. I feel so lost. Don’t leave me here alone… please.

His begging was the same every time the moon shone into the room once again. It was the same, every time his body was finally tired enough to pulls his eyes shut, forcing a shallow sleep to take over.


Sometimes the wrong things happen,
And we’re not sure what to do.
Life is slipping slowly by,
I see it passing through.

The tune was familiar, the words almost the same. But as Jason's heart ached, the meaning had been changed. He had once written the song from the perspective of the one who was dying to those awaiting their return. Now it had become a song from the waiting, to the one who was dying.

My tears they fall like raindrops,
On a summer afternoon.
So do me just one favor,
Please grant my one request…

The flowers added up around the room, evidence of just how many lives Katie had touched. Perhaps she had never thought of herself as having many friends, or that many people with whom she had contact. But Jason saw faces he'd never even seen before, show up to say a gentle word. The heart of the church was shown. Jason saw the minister on several occasions, now having his own relationship with him as well. Only now did Jason realize what he'd been missing in a Christian family. There was a bond there that he never knew existed... and he wished he would have known it so much earlier.

Don’t say goodbye…
Tomorrow’s not the end of it.
Don’t say goodbye…
Don’t stay away.
Don’t say goodbye,
Darlin’ please….

…Come home.

"How are you holding up?"

The question seemed to come every day now. Jason nods, his eyes dry. "I'm doing alright." He sighs, fiddling with the guitar pick in his hand. "I just keep talking to her... but there's never a response."

Scott looks down before his eyes drift towards Katie's bed. "You know... I was gonna marry her... we were going to be so happy..." He forces a sad smile. "But that was a long time ago."

Jason cocks his head. "Do you... still have those feelings?"

Scott thinks for a moment, then almost laughed. "It's amazing that feelings like those can ever fade. But life and time have a funny way of doing that." He shakes his head slowly. "She's my friend... and I love her as a close friend. But I've moved on, Jase... After everything I went through... and all the time that has passed... there are certain things that are simply sweet memories."

Jason swallows hard. "I don't want my feelings to turn into memories."

"They won't." Scott takes a deep breath. "They won't... she'll wake up."

Jason can only continue to hope and pray he was right.

"Scott?"

He turns to the sound of Gunner's voice. "Yeah... I'm coming."

Gunner purses his lips sadly, holding out his hand. "I need to get you back."

Scott's shoulders drop a little. House-arrest was becoming downright lonely. Carson had yet to find to find any answers and hope was wearing thin. Some people blamed Reese for not letting Scott pick his work back up, but Scott didn't. It was better if he stayed away until decisions could be made. Until then, Gunner was his guard. And until then, trips to the hospital was the only time he got to get out... no seeing friends... no seeing people at TJY... no contact with Hope... and now no Katie.

Slowly, Scott turns around and heads for the door, waving at Jason. "I'll be back tomorrow like usual."

I’ve fallen down a darkened road,
It’s a mystery I feel.
Choices were spread out before me,
Now time can only heal.

"I made these for you." Susanne holds out a brown paper back. "Couple sandwiches and some cookies."

Jason nods for her to set them on the table. "Thanks."

"Make sure you eat them, okay? Rick said you hadn't been eating very well."

"Would you?" Jason groans and leans back in the chair, rubbing his eyes. "Is Reese ready to fire me?"

"For what? Not coming in?" Susanne shakes his head. "No. You're too good, you know that. He's just as satisfied having you here watching his other favorite agent." She gives Jason's shoulder a pat. "Oh, and there's an apple in there too. Rick said to-"

"Be sure and eat it so my sugar stays up," Jason finishes for her. "I know. Thank you."

Susanne chuckles and leaves him be. Walking over to the bed once, she leans down to kiss Katie's forhead. "Come back, Kat. We miss you at the office."

I’m missing all we used to do,
I’m crying for you now.
So do me just one favor.
Please grant my one request…

"Hey, Tiger, settle down."

Ryder stops his pacing in the kitchen. "Talking to me or Henry?"

Laura rolls her eyes. "You." She sets her dishes in the sink. "You haven't been able to sit still since supper."

"Sorry." Ryder leans back against the counter. "I gotta get back to the office and makes sure Thirteen is settled for the night." For the past week, he'd been coming home at night, but he still checked on Thirteen before making sure she was in bed. "I was just thinking though... too quiet around here, ya know?"

"Yeah, I know." Laura leans against the opposite counter, folding her arms. "I keep... wondering what will happen... what the future is. We all hope Katie will come back to us, but... what if she doesn't?" Her voice starts to crack. "I miss her..."

"Me too." Ryder sighs deeply. "But she's a fighter... she'll come back. Besides, she's got a lot of mail waiting to be read."

Laura can't help a laugh as she wipes her eyes. "You sure know how to spoil a sentimental moment, don't you?"

Ryder grins. "Katie wouldn't have it any other way."

Don’t say goodbye…
Tomorrow’s not the end of it.
Don’t say goodbye…
Don’t stay away.
Don’t say goodbye,
Darlin’ please….

…Come home.

Rick stares at the computer, hitting a few keys and waiting on the results... again. He almost had it... he knew he did. He wasn't even sure why he was working on this... other than at the direct request of Jason. But all the project did was remind him that Katie was still in a coma... there was still a void at TJY.

The machine beeps and Rick groans. "Not again." Why did it seem nothing was going right lately? He sighs. No one ever knew the importance of one person, until they were gone. Nothing seemed right anymore.

Oh the storms around me rage,
And the pain, it cuts me deep.
I don’t want to stay alone down here,
I don’t want to lose it all.
Don’t make me stay alone down here,
Don’t take it all away…

"How is she?"

Hal throws down a tray of food, letting it clang on the interrogation room's table. He glares at Gage. They hadn't gotten rid of their prisoners yet. Interrogations weren't finished, and Reese seemed convinced that they would do something with Gage and Alec other than turning them over to the police yet. At least Gage had quit whining about wanting a fix. "Why should you care?"

Gage looks down, curling up tighter on the cot he'd been provided. "Never mind. I just wanted to know."

"There's no change," Hal finally answers. "No thanks to you."

"Hey, I didn't want to put her in a coma!"

"You certainly didn't help any, now did you?" Hal heads back for the door. "See you tomorrow."

Gage grits his teeth as the door slams shut again. He'd lost track of the days. No one would tell him anything. All they did was ignore him or pump him for information. A least his shakes had stopped, and the headaches weren't as bad. But he'd still do just about anything to get his hands on his drugs again.

Leaning back against the cement wall, he closes his eyes. He kept seeing Katie's beaten face, and a strange stirring crept inside of him. What was right and what was wrong?

Don’t say goodbye…
Tomorrow’s not the end of it.
Don’t say goodbye…
Don’t stay away.
Don’t say goodbye,
Darlin’ please….

…Come home.
Oh come home…
Darlin’ please come home…
Yeah yeah…

… Come home.

Jason stands to set aside his guitar once more. Easing down on the side of the bed, he knew he could get away with it, while the nurses were out. There was just enough room for him to lay on his side and put his arm around Katie. Leaning his head in close, a tear escapes. They didn't come as frequently now, but when left alone, they were hard to hold back.

His hand finds hers, and he just holds it, releasing all of the warmest emotions he could, and holding back all of the bad. At the very least, he wanted Katie to feel at peace, and he wouldn't let her feel his pain... only his love.