Flame

Somehow, Sparky's eyes drift down to the table once more as Rosetta talks. It wasn't that he was trying to disrespect her, or ignore her... but being here right now with her... alone... when he could offer her comfort... it was a temptation that he wasn't so sure he should be allowing.

Hearing what she had to say about him leaving makes his mind reel in a whole new direction. But even that halts as he suddenly hears her voice falter. Glancing up, he realizes that the tears had come again. And he couldn't blame her.

Not even sure what to say, he just sits, wishing he were better at knowing what to do... wishing he had the answers... wishing that he could take away the hurt that his friend was going through. Even when Rosetta apologizes unnecessarily, he's still quiet, at a total loss. His heart hurt. Regrets swarmed over him, haunting him like they had in the past.

And then his eyes catch sight of a toy of BJ's on the counter that hadn't yet been put away. His line of sight moves towards the door, seeing one of Mick's jackets hanging up, and a pair of his boots, still with paddock mud dried and caked on them. Turning his head a little, he sees the same photo that Rosetta had been looking at over the fireplace.

Then shifting his gaze back to Rosetta, he studies her for the longest moment... And all of the pieces seem to fall into place. She had what she deserved - a family... a family that loved her. There were bumps, and Sparky was very upset with Mick for what had happened... but it was just a bump... a small spec in the middle of the big picture. And the big picture was of the family Rosetta had. Maybe she had questions about what could have been. Maybe Sparky had questions about what might have happened, had he had more guts. But in the end, there was no point in asking those questions, or trying to figure out the answers. Because an answer would never come. It never could be, and was no longer in the plan.

God had laid out certain paths for all of them. And perhaps there had been forks in the road that would both have led to pleasing results. But what was now was what God was working with and working through to bring good. Whether Sparky and Rosetta could have had something or not just wasn't the point. The point was that she had chosen to go left instead of right, and God had blessed her with Mick - her best friend and husband. Why would Sparky wish that she did not have that? It was only selfishness that created the temptations in his heart.

Sparky was here now as a friend... a brother-in-law... a brother in Christ. There was a barrier that should not, and would not be crossed. Temptation had been born of regret and on a minor level, jealousy - neither of which were godly. Perhaps it had been good for him to voice his feelings... if only to hear them himself and realize that it was all for naught. His job was not to replace Mick - his job was to make the burden lighter while he was gone. His job was not to support Rosetta - his job was to support this family as a whole, including Mick.

And in that single instance of revelation, a small, lingering flame dies within Sparky's eyes. It was a flame he had allowed to burn for too long, hiding it in the corner and hoping no one saw. Tonight it had been exposed, and in being brought forth, he was given the opportunity to finally let it die.

But with the death of a flame that should not have been, that small hole that was left was immediately filled with the peace God had been trying to offer for so long. He'd been waiting for this very moment, waiting for Sparky to let go. And now, finally, He had the chance to let a new bit of peace be released in that hidden corner of Sparky's heart.

As if he'd been in an hour-long dream, Sparky blinks, realizing now only seconds had passed. But a time so short could be an eternity in God's eyes - and in those few seconds, new perspectives had risen. New realizations had been born. And new feelings had replaced those which had been thought impossible to remove.

Seeing Rosetta's tears, Sparky leaves his coffee mug and moves around the table to sit next to her. Putting an arm around her shoulders, he pulls her into a warm hug. "Don't apologize," he directs softly. "You have a right to cry." His embrace was one of a brother... one of a friend... one of someone who wanted to help, but not create a bigger chasm.

Moving back a little, he wipes a tear from Rosetta's cheek and looks her in the eye. "We can't change the past, but the future is ours to make. You have a family that needs you... and a husband who loves you more than anything else in the world. I know it's tough, but you can't give up... you can't live in regrets and you can't ask the impossible 'what if' questions. What's done is over and shouldn't be dwelt on. What should be dwelt on is the future... when Mick comes home and when your family will be together again. God's not gonna let you down.."

He pauses, his gaze going deep into Rosetta's eyes. "And satan's not gonna get a foothold between you and me either. You'll always be a sister to me. And I wouldn't want it any other way."

Maybe those words still stung just a little bit. And maybe he didn't notice that his own eyes had become just a little wet. But he spoke the truth. He spoke what he truly did desire, when he stripped away the regrets and selfishness.

Holding Rosetta's hand, Sparky nods. "I can't promise I won't leave. But you have my word... I won't leave before Mick comes home."