Roads

Derek lifts his eyebrows in slight surprise, then turns a kitchen chair around to straddle it as he holds the phone to his ear.

"Hmmm... well now." He hesitates, not really sure what to say or where he fit into all of this, or what his place really was to say anything. "He just up and left, huh?" Axel hadn't told him that. He'd assumed his young friend had at least told someone he was leaving. Derek had discovered that Axel's car was packed - a sign that he wasn't intending to returning to Nevada. They hadn't had time to discuss it yet, though Derek had been planning to. Maybe it wouldn't be so bad to beat Axel at this game.

"That's unfortunate. I'm sure if he knew he was missed, he wouldn't have been so hasty to up and leave."

Liz is situated upside down on the couch with her feet hanging up over the top. She lies backward, her head almost hanging off the seat as she holds up a book that she's reading.

Axel passes by the back of the couch on his way to the kitchen, and can't help the mischief. Casually walking by, he turns to grab Liz's ankles and give her a quick shove.

A backward summersault sends her sprawling onto the carpet with a shriek. "Axel!" Her book was forgotten as she springs back up to race after him down the hall. "You turkey!" But her efforts are in vain as the bathroom door is slammed in her face.

"That's cheating!" she shouts, banging her hand on the door. "I know you don't have to go because you were in there just ten minutes ago!"

The door opens a crack to reveal one of Axel's eyes and just enough of his mouth that Liz could see his smile. Her eyes narrow, but her lips start to turn up. "You think you're real funny, don't you?"

"Naw, not really." Axel opens the door all the way and leans on it nonchalantly. "Though I must say that seeing you topple off the couch was good enough that we probably could have won some money with it."

Liz tries to glare at him, her hands set on her hips. She moves closer. "Well you just better watch it. Next time it might not be me who's roadkill on the carpet." Not even thinking, she grabs the nearest thing she can - her fathers can of shaving cream. And in one fatal move, a nice foamy glob is sliding down the side of Axel's face.

Liz's eyes widen and she covers her mouth with a hand, choking on a laugh. "I'm so sorry..." A giggle escapes. "I didn't mean to..."

Axel quirks an eyebrow and blinks at her, just letting the foam remain.

Liz's bottled-up laughter creates tears in her eyes. "I was just going to threaten you, that's all."

Axel reaches out and takes the can from her, looking at it, then shaking it up a bit before turning it around.

Liz holds up her hands in defense. "Oh, no... no, no, no... I didn't mean to spray you, honest, I didn't... it was a total accident." She backs out into the hall. "Axel, don't you dare... don't you... No!" Her laughing scream bounces down the hall and she goes running, shaving cream oozing through her hair. "No! Help!" The floor shakes as Axel goes after her, both stampeding through the house.

Derek looks up quickly to see his daughter and Axel fly by the kitchen door, and his eyes widen. It takes him just a moment to regroup and return to his phone call. He sighs deeply. This woman's voice told him she genuinely wanted to find Axel. He wondered if this was the Jess that Axel had told him about.

"Well... I'm not going to tell you I don't know where he is, because that would be a lie." He cocks his head and listens, hearing that Axel and Liz had made it to the basement, well out of earshot.

"And if I told you where he was, I might be betraying his trust. On the other hand..." Derek pauses, tapping a finger on the back of the chair. "...If you were to show up here... I wouldn't be surprised if you found him."


Ryder hears the call for his plane, and he rises from his seat, slinging his backpack over his good shoulder. Heading for the gate, he sees the other passengers getting on and is ready to fall into line. But for some reason, he stops.

You’re trying to,
Make it through the storm somehow.
You’re leaving it,
All behind you, all behind now.

But your heart is torn in two.
Reminded of what’s left behind.
Loneliness awaits,
A heart that’s beating.
Where do you turn?

Turning around, Ryder sees the hallway leading away from the gates. His boarding pass feels heavy in his hand. He stares at the signs that direct passengers through the airport.

Run.
Let your feet explore the brand new world.
Run.
Let your heart be free to live again.
Run.
Let your soul ignite with brand new flame.
Learn to hope again.
Learn to walk the miles,
To a brighter shore.

Ryder starts forward, keeping his back to the gate. He could hear some of Katie's words running through his mind. His feet lead him away from the plane that was waiting to take him home.

You’re trying to,
Douse the fire of bitterness.
You’re leaving it,
All behind you, all behind now.

But your fear it holds you down.
Reminded of the pain inside.
Loneliness awaits,
A soul that’s yearning.
Where do you turn?

Another call to board the plane comes over the loudspeaker. Ryder stops. His feet want to go in two different directions. His heart can't make up his mind. His gut won't tell him which direction he should go.

Run.
Let your feet explore the brand new world.
Run.
Let your heart be free to live again.
Run.
Let your soul ignite with brand new flame.
Learn to hope again.
Learn to walk the miles,
To a brighter shore.

Ryder turns back around, aiming for the gate once more, boarding pass still in hand. The line was shorter now. Within minutes, he would be on that plane.

Don’t let the shadows call you back.
Don’t let them dictate where you’re at.
You’re strong enough to run.
You’re strong enough to breathe.
Live again.

Run.
Let your feet explore the brand new world.
Run.
Let your heart be free to live again.
Run.
Let your soul ignite with brand new flame.
Learn to hope again.
Learn to walk the miles,
To a brighter shore.


Laura wanders out of the side door of the mall, juggling her bags as she fished for her car key in her pocket. It was just starting to get a little dark out, and the wind was chilly. She’d be glad once she got home. With no plans tonight, a cup of hot chocolate and a good chick flick sounded like just the thing.

As she reaches her car, she puts her key in the door, but drops one of her bags in the process. Grumbling, she leans over to pick it up. When she straightens again, a hand grabs her shoulder.

“Good evening, Laura.”

Laura jumps and spins around, her blood growing cold at hearing that voice. Terror surges through her veins as she meets the icy stare. She opens her mouth, but words seem to get stuck in her throat. There was no one else around...

Con stretches and yawns, just ready to head on up to bed. Jason and Katie had left a while ago, the movie was over, he was tired and Jami looked tired too. He's just ready to throw his arm around her and to upstairs with her, when he sees lights reflecting through the window. “I think somebody just pulled in the driveway…”

He wanders to the door, wondering who it might be. It was a bit late for visitors, and it was already quite dark out.

Glancing through the blinds on the window, Con couldn’t quite make out the car. He goes to the door anyway, opening it with question. As he does and sees the visitor, his heart leaps into his throat.

His sister stood on the porch, her head and shoulders hanging. She wasn’t wearing a jacket, and there were several cuts on her arms.

“Laura…” Con immediate pushes open the screen door to step out onto the porch. Reaching out, he lifts Laura’s chin to see her bruised face and bleeding lip. “Oh my word, Laura, what happened?”

Seeing her brother, Laura's eyes fill with emotions, but tears won't come. All she can do is fall towards her brother's safety.

Con is quick to pull her to him, wrapping his arms around her. His eyes roam the yard and the street, still having no clue what had happened. Anger burned within him for whoever had done this, and confusion made him want answers.

“Come on,” he prompts gently. “Come inside.”

Guiding his sister into the house, Con lets the door fall shut behind them, leading Laura to the living room. Glancing to the kitchen, he nods to his wife. “Get a wet cloth and the first aid kit, please, Jamie.” Worry is etched in his voice.

Finally getting Laura to the couch, he sits down with her, forcing her to sit up and look at him. Just getting her to look him in the eye was hard enough, and real concern was surfacing in Con. This wasn't something connected with a mission at work - otherwise she would have been cleaned up before coming.

“What happened, Laura? I can’t help if you don’t tell me.”

All Laura wanted was to find a dark corner to curl up and shut out the world. “I…I was at…at the mall.”

Con gently pushes a strand of hair from Laura's face, trying not to push her. “And?”

Laura swallows hard. The words just didn't want to come. Her eyes lower again, though her eyes still remained dry. “It was Bryce.”

Con’s heart almost stops, his own veins feeling as though they turned to ice. His voice grows stern. “Bryce Mulligan?”

Laura nods miserably.

“Oh, Laura.” Con draws Laura into a tight hold, rocking her gently. So many thoughts and emotions hit him, that he’s not even sure how to react.

Seeing Jamie come in with the first aid kit, he glances up at her, the sorrow in his eyes. Focusing back on his sister again, he knows he has to ask, but dreads it. “Laura…what did he do?”

Laura just withdraws to look away, the embarrassment the only thing that put color into her face.

“Laura…you have to answer me.”

She finally glances up at her brother. Telling him what happened was hard. But she felt numb... so very numb. What Bryce had attempted so many years ago, he’d finally succeeded, and she felt like a broken, worthless rag doll, tossed into the corner, unworthy of being picked up again.

Tears fill Con’s own eyes as she confirms his fears, and he takes her in his arms again, letting her crawl onto his lap and bury her face in his chest. “Shh…you’re going to be okay…you’ll be alright… it wasn’t your fault.”

Looking to Jamie again, his gaze is full of so many things. He was desperate to fix this. He was so very angry. He was hurt for his sister’s sake. He was so sad that this had happened to her. And he was worried to see so little emotion expressed.

They needed to take Laura to the hospital to have proof documented, and they needed to tell the authorities. Though Laura didn't want to go anywhere, Con knew they needed to go as soon as possible or else Bryce might get away once again…but this time he’d gone too far.

“Jamie, go get the car started,” he suggests quietly. “I’d appreciate it if you went with us.”

Call

Giving a smile and straghting Katie shakes her head a little. She wasnt really hiding but she hadnt really told anyone where she was eather.

I'm down stairs. Just needed a little bit of quiet. Always figures its the last place you look where the person is.

Katie cant help the emotional laugh that escapes her lips as she stands from the table.

I am on my way up now, and dinner tonight sounds great. I havent seen Con in a while it will be nice I think. Not to mention extra time with you.

...As the phone rings Jess waits nervously. She didnt know what she was going to say to a person she didnt even know but calling Derek was the only lead Rocky was able to give her.

Hearing a voice on the other end Jess is quiet for a moment before finding her voice.

"Yes hello I was wondering if Derek Stevenson was around please."

Jess waits as the voice on the other end replys to her.

"I am sorry to bother Mr. Steveson but I had a friend who has recently left and I'm not sure where he want and I new you had contact with him so I was hoping maybe you would know where he was."

Drawing silent Jess relizes she hadnt even told Derek what his name was and felt a bit silly. She felt awkward about talking to him but she had to.

"Oh sorry his name is Axel Thornton and it would be a great help if you new where he was."

Welcomed Visitor

As Ryder walks down the hall and makes his way back upstairs, a weird sort of peace squeezes in amidst all the turmoil. It was small... it couldn't overshadow all of the emotions he was feeling... but any amount of peace was felt, and was a comfort.

This peace was a strange kind, but only because he continued to walk away. It was the realization that he had a friend. He might have been taken totally off guard by Katie when they met. He might have felt foolish for some of the flirtatious things he'd said around her - though he wasn't sure he'd take them back. He might have been just a little upset with her for not thwarting his attentions when she had a boyfriend. And yet... somehow... he knew beyond a doubt that Katie was his friend. He liked her. It was more than just an attraction to her good looks and keen mind. It was a fascination of who she was... how she carried herself... her undying loyalty... her immediate show of friendship to him, when he was the one going against the flow. Even now as he'd taken out his frustrations on her, made an idiot of himself and walked away... she was still there... more willing than ever to be his friend. When she said she wanted to know he was doing okay, she meant it. And right now, that was something that Ryder would tuck away in a safe place, to be drawn out when he felt alone.

He didn't bother going back to the infirmary for his shoulder or knuckles. They were busy enough trying to help Angel.

Instead, Ryder heads to the main floor, then to the back where Reese's office was. He knew that if he asked, Reese would let him go home.


Jason wanders from Katie's cubicle, glances in Dalton and Scott's office, pokes his head into the infirmary and even knocks on the bathroom door. Finally giving up, he leans back against the wall.

All right, I give up. You're too good at playing hide and seek.

Then he stops. Maybe she'd wanted it that way.

Sorry if I'm interrupting, I just got a little worried when I couldn't find you, was all. I wanted to see if you wanted to do supper with Con and Jamie. If you're too tired, that's okay, but Con just called me, so I wondered.


Rick sits at his desk and rubs his eyes wearily. He watches as Misty performs the final testing on the antidote. He prayed it would work.

But while she was hard at work, he had a phone call to make. Dialing, he reaches the secretary, then chooses to leave a voicemail message. "Hope, it's Rick Johnston. I don't know when Scott's next appointment is, but I just wanted to call you and let you know that I found out he wrote and submitted a case report to the boss this morning. I don't know how detailed it was, but this is pretty huge. You're helping him. All I can say is thanks."


Rocky looks back at Jess, his own sorrow showing in his eyes. "This is my fault," he mentions quietly. He still wasn't sure he could trust Axel. He still felt leery about him and his intentions. But he'd made things far worse by storming in on him like that. "I don't know what to think or how to trust someone like him, Jess... but I'm sorry if I ruined your friendship with him too."

Pursing his lips, he gives a little sigh. He had no idea what the whole thing about the rainbow was. It wasn't the first time he'd heard it mentioned. He could only guess it was some inside subject shared between Jess and Axel. Regardless, Jess was missing her friend.

"I don't know what he'll be like," he admits. "I don't know if he's been living a lie, or if he's truly changed from his past. I'd like to think it's the latter, because I think both you and I saw he was a good person. Surely both of us wouldn't be taken for a ride, would we?" There was more question there than he liked. He just didn't trust his gut anymore.

Finally though, he gives a little nod. "Alright. I'll help you find him. But Jess... I have no idea where to start. He doesn't have known havens to run to like normal people. He could be anywhere."


The doorbell rings. Derek looks up from the paperwork on the kitchen table, glancing through the living room to the small entryway by the door. "Gina?" he calls. "Can you get that?"

No answer. She was probably in the basement doing laundry. Derek sets his pencil down, leaving the numbers to themselves for now. He needed a break anyway. Ambling to the door, he opens it and looks through the screen to see a familiar face.

After a look of surprise passes through his eyes, a small smile creases his lips. "Well... look who the cat dragged in."

Axel grins a little. "I should have let you know I was coming."

Derek opens the screen door, asking his friend in. "You didn't even need to ring the doorbell."

A sheepish chuckle surfaces, and Axel lets his backpack slide off his shoulder as Derek gives him a brief hug. "What are you doing here? I thought you were going to stay and let things cool down. Or did you already work things out?"

"Yeah, well..." Axel shrugs and shakes his head, not really able to find the right words. "Would, um... that spare room upstairs still be empty?"

Derek's enthusiasm for seeing Axel was delayed. Without having discussed it, he knew that Axel hadn’t worked things out. Maybe his younger friend really did just need a sabbatical from the band, and brief time away from the hubbub. Perhaps it wasn’t the worst decision after all. "Sure it is," he finally answers. He squints a little. "I trust that the others know where you are."

"Axel!"

Axel turns, a smile spreading on his face. "Hey, kiddo."

Though Liz was seventeen, she'd always been "kiddo" to Axel. She smiles and comes running around through the living room, squealing with delight and giving him a big hug. "What are you doing here?"

Axel laughs and returns the hug, knowing now that Derek had said nothing to the rest of the family. Otherwise, the reception might be a bit more subdued. "Mm... just needed a vacation. And where would I rather go?"

Liz beams. "Well you know you won't get any better cooking than Mom's, so I think you came to the right spot. How come you didn't tell us you were coming? We could have had a welcome party or something."

Axel smirks at her, his eyes giving her a knowing look. "Liz... you know me better than that."

"Yeah, yeah..." She rolls her eyes. "Mr. 'I wanna be alone in my zone.'"

"You do remember."

Liz snickers. "That and more. Wait until Nick finds out you're here. He's been tinkering with a car and was dying for a chance to show you." She pauses, getting her mind back on track. "How long are you staying?"

Axel hesitates. "Well, um... not long enough to satisfy me, I'm sure."

Liz shakes her head. "Still flying by the seat of your pants." She turns around to head to the basement. "Mom!" She calls out. "Guess who's here?!"

Friend

Looking up as Ryder comes out of the room Katie listens to what he said though she didnt know how to feel. As Ryder catches her eye Katie just listens not interupting she couldnt but maybe feel her own bit of guilt for stuff as well.

"I'm sorry too Ryder. I should not have kissed you and for that I am sorry. Though I am happy I got to meet you."

Hearing that Ryder was still planing on leaving Katie's heart sank a little but she new that there would be no way of changing his mind. It was the way of an Aussie, or so it seemed that there desitions where hard to change.

"I'm sad to see you go but Hey be safe and keep in touch so I know your doin ok."

Watching as Ryder heads for the door Katie lets out a sigh as she turns back to the table just sitting staring down at it. Maybe she should of taken off today she still felt so tired and she had a killer headache now.

Lifting her head as Rocky comes in the door Jess new she was exspecting him but back so soon?! At least she had decieded to clean up a bit and take a shower. She felt presentable now at least.

Giving the best smile Jess could it soon starts to fade a little as she can see a strange look in Rocky's eyes. It was a sadness, with a hint that he new something that might hurt.

Taking the sun catcher from Rocky Jess runs her finger over it slowly and gently. The pain she felt was now replaces with a new one. The one of truly losing her friend. A slight tear rolled down Jess face as she continues to just look at the sun catcher.

"A rainbows beauty is like no other. So lies, and false truths form around it. Though the rainbow can stand strong for a while soon it knows its time to move on and if its lucky the storm will follow. Because with out the storm there is no rainbow, and without the rainbow the storm has no point in making its own beauty show."

Jess draws quiet again. Over the night and the early morning Jess had been doing a lot of thinking. She had compaired Axel to Peter, and gone over differnt things in her own head. Maybe Axel had a bad past but something just didnt add up. Axel was so much differnt and he treated her differntly knowing her own past. Axel was differnt, he was her friend.

"I have to find him Rocky. He was our friend, he was my friend and for that fact he deserves to tell me his side of what happend. Will you help me Rocky? It will take me far longer without you."

Desparation shows in Jess eyes to find there friend and know he was ok. She wasnt quite sure why she felt this way but she could only guess that maybe it was because for the first time she had found a true friend.

Suncatcher

Hearing the door open, and Katie's voice, Ryder keeps his face hidden. He felt like a fool. He cried in front of no one. Why did she have to come down here? Why did she have to see him like this?

With the door closed again, he finally looks up, spying the bag of clothes. Giving his eyes a frustrated swipe with his hand, he reaches over to bring the bag closer. Looking inside, he spies a clean set of clothes, and he withdraws the t-shirt.

Sighing, he looks down at his bloodied one. He'd done a good job on that alright. Taking his shirt off, he sees that the bleeding has pretty much stopped after he'd quit moving around so much.

After putting on the new shirt and throwing the old one away, Ryder eventually gets to his feet. He was so weary... he just wanted to curl up again and truly forget about everything. But he still needed to get away from here.

He opens the door, and is surprised to see Katie once again. She'd stayed. She'd waited.

Ryder gives another sigh, and leans his back against the open doorway. He glances down at his raw knuckles and flexes his fingers, knowing he'd been stupid not to wrap his hands before being murderous on the punching bag. "Why do you keep doing this?" he questions. His voice was harsh and raspy.

Finally he turns his head to look at Katie. His eyes were glazed and bloodshot, unable to hide that he'd been letting his emotions take over.

"I'm sorry." The apology is a quiet one, but it comes nonetheless. He was a decent man after all, and knew when he'd been wrong.

"It's not your fault that I was shot by the man who all my life's hope had been built around. Or that now he's dead, leaving me with nothing. Or that I've been uprooted and forced to come here."

He pauses and swallows hard, lowering his gaze. He was so tired, and so sore from head to toe. But worse was the pain inside.

"And I'm sorry for my comments earlier. It was my fault that I..." He stops himself, feeling silly for even saying it. Where did his foolishness end? He shakes his head. "...that I came on to you when I shouldn't have."

Looking up, he finds Katie's eyes. "You're an incredible woman, and I'd be surprised at any bloke who could ignore that fact."

He lets his eyes fall once more. He wasn't sure how much of that was his own fault or not. He still wasn't sure all what he'd felt had been his own... but at the moment... it felt the same, and he knew Katie wasn't manipulating him. And if that was true... then it had been himself all along.

Pushing off the wall, he heads for the door, moving slowly as every muscle ached. "I'll go see Reese now about plane tickets," he mentions quietly.


Getting into his car, Rocky sets the grocery sack in the passenger seat and starts the engine. He'd been out getting a few necessities, such as ice cream, for him and Jess later on. Driving down the road, he starts to pass the familiar auto shop, and for some reason, he slows.

He looks to the parking lot. Axel's car wasn't there. Rocky sighs and pulls into the lot and just sits for a moment. He did feel badly. He even felt badly for hitting Axel. Even though Axel had a record like he did... Rocky knew that he should at least have given him a chance to explain. Everyone had skeletons in their closets. Why should he have treated Axel differently?

He knew it was because he'd wanted to protect Jess. But now that was probably over. Shouldn't Rocky at least try to do something? After all, he missed his friend too and so did the others. No one knew what to do... no one knew how to be friends with someone they didn't trust. But... maybe Rocky should be the first.

He didn't know why he suddenly felt this way. Maybe it was simply God's prompting to act like Jesus.

Giving up on talking himself out of it again, Rocky reaches for his phone. He tries Axel's cell and his landline, getting nothing. Finally he gives up. Though the car was gone, that didn't necessarily mean anything.

He gets out of his car and wanders up the outside steps, knocking on the door. He receives no response. Trying the door, he finds it open. Odd, if Axel wasn't around.

Stepping inside, the interior is dim. The curtains are drawn, and the blinds shut. There were no personal belongings lying around... there was nothing hanging on the walls. It was obvious that Axel had moved out.

"Aw, Axel." Rocky's shoulders drop. He blamed himself for this. He should have given Axel a chance, even if he did have a shady past.

Wandering to the kitchen, he sees a small tank with three goldfish. A can of fish food sat next to it. Apparently Axel had known that someone would come, and had hoped that someone would take care of the pets.

Rocky sighs. Nearing the tank, he takes some food and sprinkles some in the water. It was the least he could do. He'd take them home with him.

Something else on the counter catches his eye. Moving closer, he sees that it's a suncatcher to hang in one's window. It was a brilliantly colored glass rainbow. A note lay next to it with Axel's handwriting. It simply said "Jess."

...Rocky wanders back down the hall of TJY, his purpose for having left was partway forgotten. Arriving at the little room again, he knocks before entering, then goes and eases down on the edge of the bed. "Jess..." He didn't know if he should have brought it or not, but he had.

He slowly hands Jess the suncatcher. "I was just at Axel's place. I thought maybe I should at least tell him I was sorry for punching him. But... he's gone. All his personal stuff is gone, and... this was on his counter with your name on it."

After all

Finding her way down stairs Katie's frustrations from the morning continues. Nothing had seemed to go right not to mention Angel was getting worse still. She just wanted to be alone. Finding a chair at the table Katie sits down kicking her feet up and letting out a long sigh.

Leaning her head back and closing her eyes Katie's ears finally pick up a sound. It always sounded like crying. Standing from her chair Katie goes over to the workout room where she saw the light on. Looking through the window in the door Katie seeing Ryder and the blood seeping through his shirt.

Rolling her eyes Katie goes back up the steps and to her cubicle again grabbing the brown paper bag before heading back down stairs again.

Giving a knock on the door lightly Katie opens it and sets the bag inside the door.

"I guess you will need this after all."

Katie for once didnt know what to do next. Last thing he had said was to leave him be. Katie didnt want to disrupt that.

"Ryder, I hope your ok. I..."

Katie cuts her words off. Ryder was bleeding and she didnt want to leave him alone but she didnt want to crowd him eather.

Closing the door again Katie resumes her seat at the table. Her should could keep an eye on him but at the same time leave him be.

Release

A flash of something, almost surprise, passes through Ryder's eyes at Katie's reaction. Was she playing him? Was she really that upset?

He opens up his mouth to retort, but nothing more will come. Instead, he just drops his shoulders in surrender and waves her off. He didn't know up from down anymore, let alone know how to handle a woman, least of all one like Katie.

Spinning on his heel, he stalks from the break room and down the hall. But reaching the infirmary, he didn't want to go back in. His eyes drift down the hall to the stairway. He didn't know what Katie had meant by going downstairs.

Glancing over his shoulder, Ryder changes his route...


The clock showed that it had been several hours. The downstairs had remained quiet, leaving one person alone, while upstairs, no one had known where he'd gone.

The punching bag swung again as Ryder's fist hits it one more time. He was drenched in sweat and didn't care. The stitches in his shoulder had been torn and blood had seeped through his shirt, but he ignored it.

Another fist goes flying, this time accompanied by an angry growl. It wasn't fair. It just wasn't fair. Hope built up for years had all crumbled in one single blow. He sees Brian's eyes again. Another fist slams into the bag. He hears the shot again. The bag spins on its rope. He sees Carson and another hard hit lands.

But soon... soon, all energy is spent. Ryder lifts his fist for another punch, but it falls weakly to his side. His knuckles were bruised and bloodied and he didn't even notice. He was too numb to care. All hope of his lifelong venture was over. He'd been uprooted. He'd almost been killed. And all for what?

Stepping back, he leans against the wall, out of breath, the sweat pouring down. Slowly he slides to the floor. At first, the stinging sensation stays behind his eye. But as the first tear rolls down his cheek, the others can't be stopped.

Pulling his knees up to his chest, Ryder curls up in the corner, the tears running freely. He'd lost his brother. He'd lost his home. He felt like murdering Carson. He felt like letting himself die. He felt miserable and alone.

Eather way

Hearing Ryder's words Katie didnt know what else to say. She new what He was talking about, and she new he was hurting for what happen to his brother. There was nothing else she could say that could take that pain away.

"I guess eather way it will hurt just as much."

Katie could feel the tears in her throat, and she could feel the stinging in her eyes though she refused to let them out.

"Hey, just dont forget me ok?"

No matter how many times she did it, and no matter how many times it happend Katie always would have a hard time letting go of people knowing that she might never see them again. For her it was the hardest thing in the world to do.

Finally turning around again a tear rolls down Katie's cheek.

Behind bars

"Aw, spare me the speech, Katie." Ryder shakes his head, his glare remaining. "Your words... your presence... you know how to make people feel good, don't you? You have the ability to just reach in, and let them feel however you want them to. Well it's not going to work. Not again."

Gesturing with his arm, he winces, having forgotten how much it hurt.

"And as far as keeping everything else inside, you better be glad I am. You got a choice. Watch me walk away and go back to Australia where I belong, or see me behind bars for murder."

Let it

"You belong with friends Ryder and thats what I am, what Jason is. I didnt help drag you out of that plant because I didnt like you. I would have refused you leave you there because I care about you. If something will make you feel better than do it. Dont let whatever is going on inside you fester Ryder. Even if you do go back home that dosnt mean its just gonna go away. Its going to always be there."

A look pass through Katie's eyes that maybe she was thinking to much herself. Katie new Ryder wanted to say more thought she wasnt sure what he wanted to say, but wished he would.

"When I first came here it wasnt my home eather, and I certinly didnt belong eather Ryder. But over time things fell into place. That can happen for you to if you let it."

Don't belong

Ryder remains in the doorway for a moment, forcing himself to stay and listen instead of just walking away. To her references to not apologizing, he rolls his eyes. "Yeah, well next time I..." He bites his tongue. Something was there that he simply wasn't saying.

Instead, he reroutes to the rest of what she says. "There's only one thing that would make me feel better, and I need to leave before I do it. There's nothing to reconsider. This isn't my home and I don't belong here."

Reconsider

Katie shakes her head and turns sharply as Ryder goes past her. It was almost like a dagger to the heart and she wasnt sure why.

"I'm not sorry, and there is no point in saying your sorry eather."

Stopping for a moment Katie thinks. Was Ryder really talking about the kiss or his attitude. Katie wasnt sure. As far she she new Ryder wouldnt have remembered the kiss.

"Please reconsider staying Ryder. I don't want to see you go. At least try taking your anger out downstairs huh before you go and see if that makes you feel better."

Apology

As Katie speaks, strange changes flash in Ryder's eyes, proving that there was a whole lot more than one thing going on inside of him.

"I could care less about the Agency," he growls. "If they can kill me, then the best man won."

Finally, he shoulders past Katie, but stops at the door, turning one more time. "As far as you and I go, I apologize for any inappropriateness on my part. I should have known better."

Friend

Katie stands sound in her position bocking Ryder. He was her friend and she was not going to let him go that easy.

"You cant go home Ryder. The Agency will kill you if you do. And I wont let it go, your my friend and I dont back away from them."

Katie didnt want to see Ryder go for more than on reason. She didnt want him to die, and he was her friend and if he left she might never see him again.

Fury

A knowing look passes through Rocky's eyes. He understood Jess not wanting to get out. "Mm, a movie eh? I think I could handle that as long as you let me pop some popcorn. What would we be going for this time? Drama? Comedy?" He quirks an eyebrow. "I'll even sit through a chick flick."


Ryder stops, though his eyes roll to the ceiling. "Just let it go, Katie. No, it's nothing you did, alright?"

He finally looks back at her. A strange fire burned behind his eyes. An unleashed fury that had developed after too many hours of thinking while others assumed he was asleep.

"Now move. I'm going home."

Wrong

As Ryder starts to go past Katie resists to let him go. Something was wrong this was not the same guy she had met even days before.

"Ryder whats wrong with you? Did I do something wrong to make you so short with me?"

Katie new Ryder was not remembering some things but other than they she didnt know what was going on and she couldnt help but feel a bit put off by Ryder attitude.

Looking back at Rocky once again at the mention of going out Jess than looks down at her cup as her face drops to a null expression. She didnt want to go out, not with Peter around still. He wouldnt dair try to talk to her with someone alse there but she didnt want to even chanse a scene.

"It would be nice if there was a rainbow out today."

Giving a sigh Jess was tired of this feeling and tired of having to hide. but there was no other choose not yet, not now.

"I don't really wanna go out. But I think they have a dvd player around here maybe we could watch a movie or something."

Don't need...

Rocky pulls a chair over and turns it around to straddle it and face Jess. He sips his own coffee and shrugs. "It's not too bad out this morning. Going to be a warm day I think. Kinda hazy out right now."

He pauses, then looks at her again. "I don't have to work today... if you needed to or just wanted to get out or anything, I'm free."


Ryder had been lost in thought, and he looks up quickly as Katie enters the break room. For a moment, he just looks at the offered bag, but he doesn't accept it. Instead, he turns, tossing out the rest of his coffee and ignoring her question. "Don't need it," he replies a bit gruffly. "I won't be sticking around long enough to use it."

His eye remain dull and almost cold - a contrast to the day they'd met. "Stay out of my way, and I'll stay out of yours." Aiming for the door, he starts to shoulder past her.

Weather

Entering TJY Kaite gives a small happy sigh. It was good to go out on a case, but nothing was better than being home safe in her own bed and be able to shower.

Heading to the break room for her morning cup of coffee Katie holds a brown paper bag in her hand with a few items for Ryder. Entering she was saprised but happen to see Ryder up and about. Going over to the counter where he was leaning Kaite holds the bag out to him forgetting about the coffee for now.

"Heya Its good to see you up and around. I got some clothing for you I hope they are your size. Hows Rick been treating you?"

Looking up as Rocky enters the room this time he dosnt startle Jess. She had been awake for several hours now working many differnt things through her mind. If she wasnt thinking about Peter and the fear of him finding her she was thinking about Axel and how much she did miss him. Sometimes she even thought about both of them at the same time trying to figure out in her head how Axel could of ever done anything like Peter had.

"Thanks for the coffee."

Taking a cup from Rocky Jess sips the warm liqued. Its felt good sending the warmth through her. She had felt so cold all night even though she had many covers she was still chilled to the bone.

Running her around the glass ring Jess looks up again.

"How's the weather outside?"

Continuing to work Misty moves back and forth between micrascope, papers, and the vials again. They were getting close and this much was for certin.

Looking out the courner of her eye at Angel withering in the bed. Since she first came here she had changed so much. Most her color was gone, her breathing was very shallow and she looked so small laying in the bed.

Misty only hoped it wouldnt be to late by time they got the anidote right.

A new morning

Scott jumps a little as Dalton comes into the office, and for a moment, he's ready to get up and take his dog out, not sure if Dalton's surprise had been a complaint. But seeing the big man lean down and scratch Domino's head, Scott relaxes a little again.

Though his blind eye is to him, Scott can feel Dalton watching him, and he just gives a little nod. "I guess... it feels good to be doing something too."

He gives a little sigh and stares at his computer screen. Now what? He knew there were other things he could be doing. Contemplating a few moments, he can hear Dalton's keyboard clicking. Finally he straightens again, to find something to do that wouldn't stretch his brain, but would keep him from getting bored.


The rest of the day is relatively quiet. Ryder finally settles down on a cot in the infirmary, eventually falling asleep. Rick and Misty work in shifts, trying to come up with the antidote, both of them at some point, going home to get a little bit of rest, but then coming back again for more work. Angel just needed to hang on a little bit longer.

Scott works for a while with Dalton, then winds up wandering around for a little bit, helping in the infirmary, then winds up back in the office again, that evening to spend another night on the floor.

Jason finishes up with Reese, checks on everybody else, and heads home for some sleep. He doesn't rise until that evening to have supper with Katie, then it's bed once again.

Carson isn't seen until later that night, after having been around town all day. He'd talked with countless people, gotten into records he shouldn't have even known about, hit the side streets and more, but so far he'd seen no sign of Peter. Stopping back by TJY that evening, he visits briefly with Jess and gives her a milkshake, then says hi to Misty, but seeing her nonstop work, he opts to head home. Tomorrow he would continue his quest. Tonight he would get some sleep.

Rocky comes back, as promised, with supper for him and Jess. He sits with her for a while in the small room, keeping conversation on a light path - one that never leads to Peter or Axel. He promises to be back the next day, and bids Jess farewell for the night, leaving her safe at TJY.


And so the night moves on. And once again, the dawn emerges. With it are the unknowns... the unknowns of the future. With each ray of light spreading across the land, a new choice is laid out... a new venture... a new path. Each day brings a future untouched, ready to be lived.


"What can you tell me?" Rick shines a light into Ryder's eyes, checking him over. It was morning, and after sleeping the night through, his patient was finally awake. He and Misty were almost ready to try the antidote, but while she continued, he turned his attention to Ryder for a few minutes.

Ryder blinks, wincing a little from the light, and drawing his head back. His head hurt enough the way it was. Sitting on the edge of the cot, he reaches around to pull a t-shirt over his head, having just a little difficulty with his throbbing shoulder. "It's all foggy," he mumbles.

"You don't remember being here yesterday?"

Ryder shakes his head. "I remember getting shot... then it's all a blank." He pauses, squinting as he thinks. "I guess I remember being on a plane and... I knew I was here... think I remember you and some other sheila doctor. But... that's about it."

"You don't remember Carson digging that bullet out of you?"

"No."

"Or going crazy on us after you got here?"

"No. But sorry if I did. What all's happened?"

Rick shrugs. "Well, you got the main parts. Apparently you were shot, then they got you back to your place where Carson took the bullet out. You all climbed on a plane, got here, you threw a fit, Katie helped settle you down, and here we are."

"Where are the others?"

"They'll be around." Rick sees Ryder rubbing his head. "I'd give you something for that headache, but you warned me yesterday not to do that."

"Mm." Ryder just grunts a little. "Got any coffee?"

"There's some being made in the break room right now."

Ryder glances around the infirmary, spotting Angel. "Who's that?"

"Angel. She's the reason you were on that mission."

"Oh." Ryder slowly rises, wincing a little. His shoulder hurt like the dickens. "Got a place to clean up?"

"Go to the hall and turn right. Bathroom's just a couple doors down."

Following directions, Ryder heads down the hall, carrying with him some clean clothes. After showering, shaving and brushing his teeth, he did feel a lot better, apart from his throbbing shoulder. Wandering back down the hall in his bare feet, he finds the break room empty, and helps himself to a cup of coffee.


"Good morning!" Rocky taps his knuckles on the door and enters the small room, keeping his voice low but cheerful. In his hands, he held two styrofoam cups of coffee from the shop downtown, along with a couple donuts for breakfast. He didn't want to invade Jess' space or startle her, but he wasn't going to ignore her either.


Axel gives a frustrated groan as his right hand starts to shake. The tingling had started ten minutes ago, then the pain had come. Now the spasms were making it difficult to drive.

Irritated, Axel takes the next right to exit into the parking lot of a rest stop. Taking a few minutes, he rubs his hand, digging deep and trying to relieve the nerves. It seems like forever before the muscles stop trembling, but even then, the pain persists.

"I don't have time for this," he grumbles. But on the inside, he was more scared than annoyed. One of these times, the pain and numbness might not go away.

Unfortunately, stopping gave his mind more time to wander without having to concentrate on the road. Part of him felt like a little kid running away to avoid getting yelled at after breaking a lamp or something. But the rest of him was too stubborn to turn around. There was no point in going back. No point in staying.

He starts his car again. He could drive with one hand until the pain stopped.

Shower

Misty works diligently next to Rick. The group was home, Ryder was ok, but work was far from over. They were rapidly losing Angel but the hour now and there was no time to wast. Misty was tired, she was exsausted but she had to hold out just for a little while longer than she could relax.

Giving a nod to Rocky Jess watches him leave till she is alone once more. Crawling under the covers she throws them over top of herself as her eyes just stair at the wall for a moment. She head sinking into the soft pillow. Finally closing her eyes tight Jess trys to block out the sun, and the pain of everything that was going on. She'd been hurt again, and lost her friend who understood and did everything to try and make her comfortable about him. Jess hated how she felt again even though it wasnt as bad as last it will till embarassing.

Heading into TJY a little late Dalton's hair is still wet from his rushed shower. Not paying much attachen he enters the office and just about steps on Domino but see her in time.

"Holy crap dog your way to small to be laying just anywhere."

Not being able to resist Domino Dalton bends down and gives her a scatch on the head before staghting and seeing Scott.

Straghting Dalton gives a nod to Scott as he goes over to his desk.

"Good Morning. Its nice to see you here, I hope you are more often."

Sitting down and turning his computer on Dalton puts his sunglasses on top of his head before glancing at Scott again out of the courner of his eye. It was good seeing Scott out and working on something.

Katie can't help the laugh that escapes her lips giving a roll of her eyes.

Oh ya dirt streaked face and blood stained hands.

Katie leans her head on Jason's shoulder before lifting it again and gives him a kiss on the lips right as he is called away.

I am gonna go and try to clean up. I do believe I have seen better days. Dont you go far without me ya hear.

Turning Katie heads back out the door going home.

Antidote Search

A bit of disappointment flickers in Ryder's eyes as Katie pulls away from her light kiss. But a weary grin emerges. He looks as though he's going to say something, but doesn't. Letting go of her hand, he rolls over onto his good shoulder. "You better go do your thing," he prompts groggily. His eyes fall shut, his breathing finally relaxed.

Hearing Katie get up and walk away though, his eyes crack open again. He didn't want to face what sleep would bring.

A few moments later, it's the doctor that's in front of him. Rick checks Ryder's pulse, then shakes his head. "You realize you should be dead."

"Mm,mm." Ryder shakes his head a little. "Not today."

Rick quirks an eyebrow. "And at the very least, you should be asleep after all that. Your body is completely worn out."

Ryder's only response is to try and bring the rest of the room into focus.

Rick really was baffled. Either Ryder should have died, or at least now he should be having far worse problems than just not being able to sleep. He'd stopped breathing. His heart had stopped. But who was Rick to argue with what he saw? "Can I get you something to help you sleep?"

"I told you... no meds."

Rick furrows his brow. "Why not?"

Ryder ignores the question, coming back with his own, though his slurred speech proved how tired he was. "Did you... give me a sedative... or something?"

"Yeah. About three. And even that didn't bring you down."

"Immune." Ryder forces his eyes to stay open. "Agency scum... gave me one too many."

Now Rick was more intrigued. "They gave you so many that you built up an immunity?"

"My whole system is whacked." Ryder taps his chest. "Heart don't like meds anymore."

"I can't even give you a light pain killer for your shoulder?"

"Not unless you want me to kiss death again."

"Or Katie."

Ryder quirks an eyebrow, trying to figure out if Rick was reprimanding or teasing. He finally decided it was a little of both. "Or Katie."

"Well... try to sleep." Rick gives his arm a pat. "Once Katie's back, you'll have some clean clothes and... we'll get the cot out so you're a little more comfortable." He moves back to the counter next to Misty once more. "Alright... here's what we have from Jason. This vial here is the poison, and I'm guessing this is the antidote, but we need to test it first to make sure..."


Rocky's shoulders drop at little at Jess' mention of Axel. He felt the same miserable pangs. He'd debated with himself all morning about calling Axel, but never had. What sense was there, calling someone to let him know Jess was hurt, when Rocky had separated them in the first place so Axel wouldn't be the one to hurt her?

Brought back to the conversation, he doesn't make Jess think about Axel anymore. He smiles. "Okay. Sandwich from Mom and Pop's it is."

He reaches over to gives Jess' shoulder a little squeeze. "I'll be back at suppertime then. If you need anything in the meantime though, I've got my phone on me."

Getting up from the bed, he heads to the door, turning just once more to toss Jess a wink before disappearing into the hall.


"I don't think that's a good idea. Just keep cool and we'll continue the investigation the right way."

Carson's eyes narrow as Reese talks to him. "I just led a successful mission for you, Reese. But I'm not part of the Elite, and therefore don't have to take orders from you."

"Then I can arrest you."

"Don't make me stand around and do nothing!" Carson's palm slams down on the desk.

Reese is getting worked up himself. "I don't want you going out and doing something stupid!"

"I won't kill him," Carson promises. "But let me at least look for him. Please."

Reese rolls his eyes and throws his hands in the air. "I know I can't stop you."

"Good. Can I borrow a TJY van?"

"Now you're pushing it."

"I know where the keys are."

Reese flops back down in his chair and looks up at the man he wished TJY had never lost. "Don't let the door hit you on the way out." Watching Carson leave, he shakes his head. Too much was going on at once. If Carson wanted to go after Peter, so be it. Right now, Reese was just relieved that the Australian mission had gone as well as it had. Apparently Ryder was here now, but that would be dealt with when things settled down again.


Scott stares at the computer screen. He was still alone in the office. Words had come faster than he'd thought they would, and now the cursor blinked at the end of the document. Within a couple seconds, it has been emailed to Reese.

Scott leans back in his chair, exhausted. Emotions lay behind his eyes. His stomach churned. He hadn't liked writing that report. But it was over. It was over.


Jason's eyes fall shut at he sits behind his desk. Just one minute. One minute to rest his eyes. That's all. The phone's intercom beeping makes him jump. "Huh?"

"Jase." It was Reese. "Like to see you about the mission before you head home."

Jason sighs. "Didn't Carson talk to you?"

"Briefly, but he... stepped out."

"Oh alright..." Jason sighs. "Coming." He gets up from his chair and wanders out into the hall wearily. He's just in time to meet Katie leaving too.
I need sleep, Hero... just sleep.

He pulls her in next to him as they walk, ready to part once they hit the main floor.
Have I said lately how beautiful you are?

He grins and stops, looking down at her. She was just as disheveled, weary and dirty as he was.
Just about perfect.

Leaning down, he gives her lips a kiss.
We'll catch up with each other sometime later, okay?

"Jase!"

He rolls his eyes at Reese' shout, still looking at Katie. "I'm being summoned."

Lookin good

Looking at Ryder again in the eyes Katie's smile turns into a grin as she shakes her head at Ryder.

"You sure are a flirt and you know just the right things to say huh?"

Leaning in again Katie press her lips to Ryder's letting it linger for a moment before pulls away.

"For a guy who just died, you sure are looking good."

Katie cocks her head just a little bit as she looks into Ryder's eyes searching the deepth of them trying to see the deeper him. She new he probley felt out of place here and there was no blaming him. Katie only hoped he would find his place and feel welcomed.

All I get

Ryder still just holds one eye open, weak, but more alert now. Getting the kiss on the cheek, he quirks an eyebrow a little, but says nothing, just listening to what Katie is saying.

He shakes his head. "Food is the furthest thing from my mind," he admits hoarsely. "You, on the other hand..."

His grip tightens around Katie's fingers. His voice is still low. "I just died... and all I get is a peck on the cheek?"

I thought

Trying to hold a small laugh in Katie slightly turns her head to look at Ryder. She wasnt sure that to say to that.

"Bad guys up the hall eh? I'd probley believe that before the CPR thing because...wait a tick...you big dink."

Katie cant help the sly grin that spread on her lips. Leaning into Ryder Katie gives him a soft kiss on the cheek than keeping her face close to the side of him she whispers.

"Sorry, I thought I hurd the bad guys too."

Pulling away again Katie gives Ryder hand a gentil squeeze.

"I am going to run home fast and get cleaned up, and find some new clothing for you as well. Would you like me to pick anything up for you to eat? And do you think you will be ok while I am gone? It will probley be for only an hour."

Searching Rocky's face for a moment Jess finally looks away. She didnt feel to hungry but she new she should eat.

"Sure..I think that would be good. There is this nice restront down the road from Axel's place that we use to go they have really good....."

For a moment Jess words trail off. Saying his name reminded her that he wasnt around and it hurt Jess to think about it. Right now was the storm of the centery and a rainbow would be needed but that Rainbow was not around. '

Since lastnight before the consert she hadnt much thought about everything that went on her mind was to busy. She wanted to forget and she had but not it was back and it mixed with the hurt she was already feeling.

Quick to rething her words Jess changes her mind.

"Maybe just a sandwhich from Mom and Pop's would be good."

Or do I

Ryder's silence seems to signal that he's asleep. But in reality, even in his state, he was digesting Katie's words. As her fingers run over his hand, he turns his wrist and opens his palm to catch her hand and hold it still.

"I'm sure I heard bad guys," he quips quietly. "...Coming up the hall."

One eye opens halfway to spy Katie, his voice still weak. "Or maybe I need CPR again."


Rocky offers Jess a gentle smile. "Yeah, I know you probably hate staying here, but if it keeps you safe, it's worth it, right?"

He nods. "If you want, after work, I can bring you some supper from anywhere you like... my treat?"

Friends

Looking over at Ryder though his eyes were closed Katie shakes her head. Though it started out rough she had found a good friend something that was rare.

"Are you kidding me? Who alse would I be able to use as a decoy if the bad guys came around the courner again huh?"

A smile curls on Katie's lips as she trys to lighten things just a little.

"Your my friend, and I never left my friends down no matter what I'll put up a fight even if ya did want me to. Good friends are hard to come by to just throw them to the wolfs like that, even if you have given up on yourself I havent Ryder."

Katie softly runs her finger over the top of Ryder's hand. She always did care about her friends and always took it upon herself to keep them safe thats just the way she was.

Moving a little bit to give Rocky some room Jess pulls her knees up to her chest. It was nice of Rocky to have stoped by she certinly wasnt exspecting it.

"I..wasnt sleeping. Just laying there stairing at the wall."

Jess is quiet for a moment, she couldnt have fallen asleep if she wanted to. There was to much going through her head to even think straght.

" I'm ok I guess considering. I guess I am going to be staying here for a while witch sounds overly fun in itself but it will keep me out of trouble and from anyone getting to me so I guess its a good thing."

Just wanted

Ryder shakes his head numbly. "It's just... the way I am."

Slowly, his breathing relaxes again, and Rick deems it safe to let him be once more. Though this time he paid closer attention to what was happening around him.

Ryder shifts alittle, the throbbing in his shoulder starting up again. "You shoulda just... let me go," he states wearily. "I woulda been... better off."


Rocky cringes a little as at first Jess is frightened. Once she stops though, he steps a little closer. "Don't be sorry... it was my fault."

Moving in a couple steps, he eases down cautiously on the edge of the bed. "I didn't want to wake you. I just... wanted to see how you were doing."

Didnt

Still feeling Ryder's hand tight in her own Katie draws close next to him again just letting him hold her hand.

Keeping her voice soft as she sits down Katie questions.

"Why cant you have drugs? Is it something to do with the Agency?"

Katie can only imagen what it was and right now talking to Ryder was keeping her calm and proving to her Ryder was alive an ok.

Rolling over Jess didnt even hear Rocky at the door. Giving a jump seeing him Jess eyes wildly search his face as she pushes herself aganst the wall behind her.

Finally relizing it was only Rocky Jess can feel herself calm just a little as she still sits close to the wall. She felt so foolish but she also didnt exspcet him to be right there.

"Sorry."

She manages to whisper to Rocky.

"I didnt hear you knock."

Kind of

Ryder's hand finds Katie's and his fingers wrap around hers in a vice grip as his eyes still roam wildly back and forth. His breathing is shallow and he shakes.

Displeased with the progression, Rick brings out another syringe, trying to find out what would help Ryder's system. But before the needle can be inserted into his vein, Ryder mumbles groggily. "No... you'll... kill me."

Rick stops. "What?"

Ryder fights to keeps his eyes halfway open. "Don't," he manages. "I can't..."

"It's just a sedative. It will help you relax if it can get through to your system."

"No," Ryder insists. "I can't... it's a... the reaction... no drugs... no more."

Rick lifts his eyebrows, and withdraws. "Are you allergic to something? Is that what happened?"

"Kind of." Ryder's eyes fall shut and he licks his dry lips. "Just... leave me be..."

Rick sighs and backs off, motioning for Misty to do the same. As long as Ryder was out of the woods, he wouldn't try for any more answers.

Though Ryder seemed to not have heard Katie at all, he had. And though it would seem he'd drifted to sleep again, his grip on Katie's hand proved he was still awake, perhaps not even realizing what he was doing.

Crap

Stepping up once again Katie's face is stricken with tears as her head beats lowdly in her chest. They had almost lost him, Ryder had almost died in front of her.

"Ryder its ok, I'm here with you. This is Rick and this is Carson's girlfriend Misty. They wont hurt you."

Katie moves a hand to place it on Ryder's arm again.

"I almost thought I lost you.You scaired the crap out of me you know."

Breath

It feels like a confusing place. It's not dark and it's not something to be feared. But it doesn't feel right either. No matter how wide the gaze, nothing can be seen on the outside. But here, it seems clear. Like a painter's canvas, the surroundings are clear, yet muted by strokes of the artist. There's no gravity, but no dizziness either.

Breath. Air fills the lungs, expanding them, sending oxygen through the blood. A light. A face.

It's warm here. Like a child at play. Or a rainy day inviting a soft blanket. It's like the feeling of blowing the seeds off a dandelion to watch them float on the summer breeze.

Breath. Air flows in and out. A voice. A face. Desperation. Begging.

But it's so nice here. Can't I stay?


Rick whirls around at Katie's cry and sees her trying to revive Ryder. His eyes wide, he rushes to Ryder's side, checking his pulse and looking at his eyes. "I don't understand - he was stable not five minutes ago."

Moving quickly, he takes over, directing Katie to stand back, and asking for Misty's assistance. "Don't do this," Rick speaks as if hoping his words would revive his patient. He couldn't lose someone. Not like this. He breathes into Ryder's lungs, his hands going to the chest to pump, counting in his head.


Breath. It comes. It goes. It draws life. But it calls the soul from this place. It beckons. Time held no bearing. But not now... not now.


"Come on, Ryder," Rick begs as he and Misty do all they can. He gives orders, desperate to see the life back in the man's eyes.


Breath. It breaks through the barrier, shattering the light. The colors of the canvas twist and turn into a blur of reality and dream. A flash of darkness hits until the cold air is felt once more. Life. But which was truly life?


Ryder's eyes spark and suddenly he gasps for breath. He looks around wildly, staring up into the faces that were still not familiar to him. A panic sets in, and once more he starts to fight.

"Whoa, whoa, easy." Rick tries to hold him down, not knowing if he should be relieved he was breathing again or afraid of overworking Ryder's system. "Katie, talk to him, please," he directs. They'd administered all the drugs they'd dared, they'd started his heart and breathing once more. But he needed to be kept still to recover.

Head First

Giving a smile Katie was happy to see Ryder awake. He might not know where he was, or how he got here but at least he didnt have to wake to strangers faces.

About to say something to Ryder Katie feels his hand drop and sees his breathing stop. A wave of panic hits her as her voice rises just a little.

"RYDER....?"

Shaking him just a little and not any reply instince kicks in as Katie stands. Leaning over Ryder Katie starts to do CPR the way she new how to only hoping someone would see her and come to help more.

In between breaths she try to hold back her tears as she pleads with him.

"Come on Ryder dont give up on me."

Ceased breath

Carson studies Angelica as she talks, taking in the information like a sponge. His mind was already calculating... already at work. Her final statement makes him pause, and he just looks at her. She knew that he wouldn't be held back from this case, Elite agent or not.

After asking a few more questions, he finds out that Jess hadn't been hurt quite as badly as last time, though Peter had been on his way to do more. Apparently Rocky and Reese had arrived just in time. Carson still wished he would have been there though.

"Alright..." He pauses, contemplating his options. "I might be back. Thanks." Turning around, he stalks out again, this time heading for Reese's office. Just as he reaches the main floor though, he almost runs into someone else. "Rocky!"

"Whoa, Carson, you're back." Rocky lifts his eyebrows. His friend look like he'd been on a battle field. "Everything alright?"

"Um, yeah...yeah. I just saw Jess."

Rocky's eyes dim. "Yeah. I came to see how she was."

"Shook up. But... at least it wasn't quite as bad as last time."

Rocky shakes his head, holding back what he really wanted to say about Peter. "I'm just glad I was there, and what's his name... the chief."

"Reese."

"Yeah, him. Otherwise..." Rocky stops. "Is Jess up?"

"Don't know. You can check the room."

"Okay, thanks."

Carson watches Rocky head down the hall, then keeps on his route to see Reese.


Rocky wanders past the line of doors, not totally confident of where everything was, even though he'd been here the night before. He sees into the infirmary, noting that it was quite busy, then continues to the next room. He knocks quietly with a knuckle before cracking the door. Peeking into the dimness, he sees Jess' figure on the bed. But instead of going in, he just stands for a moment. She was resting. He wouldn't disturb her.


Ryder groans and moves around, but with not enough strength to fight back Rick, who held him still as Misty worked on him. Things were foggy... fuzzy... nothing made a whole lot of sense. He wasn't really afraid... but there was no peace in this feeling either.

Once the stitches are completed and a bandage in place, Ryder's eyes are closed, seeming to relax more on the table. While the bed was still taken by Angel, he'd been made to be as comfortable as possible in adequate space.

With Rick and Misty cleaning up and away from the table, Ryder stirs. Turning his head, one eye is pried open, bringing Katie's face into focus. He was tired... so tired... numb, almost not even feeling as though he were lying in the infirmary.

He opens his mouth, his voice a quiet and hoarse whisper. "You're here..." His arm reaches over so his finger can barely touch Katie's cheek. "Does that mean..." His words trail off, his eyes becoming dim and faraway. His hand drops from her face, and suddenly, his raspy breathing ceases.


Clint's coffee lowers as he rests the mug on his knee, Wendy taking his other hand. As it's placed on her belly, he almost flinches. He was used to touching her, but... it was different this time. There was a life there... one that was a part of both of them... so unplanned... and so terrifying.

Relaxing though, he gives her a little rub, a smile forming on his face. He leans his cheek into her hand, letting her calm him down from the fears that welled inside. "I love you."

Easing closer, Clint puts his own cup down, and he leans over Wendy, the smile staying on his face. "And I am so happy that you and I will be spending the rest of our lives together." Leaning in further, he puts his lips to hers, tenderly, softly, before letting his kiss linger, bringing his rough palm to her face.

Any man

Sinking down on the bed Jess crawls under the covers and pulls them up over herself. She felt cold and tired maybe all she needed was a little more sleep till Carson came back. Just a little more and she would be ok. Slowly Jess' eyes become to heavy to keep open and she slowly difts back to sleep.

Looking up from her desk Angelica is a bit saprised by Carson's entrince but dosnt bother saying anything about it. She new Jess was his friend and he had to be pretty upset about what happend and she couldnt blame him.

"Well I dont know much becase the original case was closed. From the paper work I got they said a second hearing he had witch I didnt even know about it."

Angelica holds up the paper that she had found on her desk dated a few weeks back. She still felt resposable for this whole thing, and being away she hadnt gotten it. If only she had than maybe they could of stoped this form happening again.

"They said that dew to a technacality they had a second hearing and a woman came forth as a whitness that Peter was with her the whole night that this happend to Jess. So they ended up letting him go. As far as where he is I dont know. I would guess look at old hangouts, people he new and stuff as that nature."

Searching Carson's eyes Angelica can see the anger more clearly than ever.

"Don't worry Carson they are looking for him and we have witness this time saying he did hurt Jess. They will find him. However if you happen to find him first I'm behind you. I myself dont take kindly to guys that hit a woman."

Pulling a chair up to the bed Katie sits down, a warm bath and new cloths being forgotten. Right now someone she had formed a friendship with was in need and she might very well need to calm him down again.

Staying close Katie gently gives a small pat to Ryders good arm to let him know she was there. He'd want to see a face he new when he woke and Katie would be right there for him.

Setting the coffee down on the night stand Wendy sits up a little stranger so she can be closer to Clint. Reaching out she lays a hand on his arm and gives a smile.

"Clint, I am happy. You and I are going to start a family how could I not be happy? I dont want you to run yourself ragged because than you will miss out on the important things."

Bringing her hand down Clint's arm to his hand, taking it Wendy gently puts in on top of her stomach her face beaming.

"I dont want to miss out on our child."

Bringing her own hand back to Clint's face she gives another smile as she looks at Clint's tired eyes.

"I love you just the way you are and I know you will provide all you can I have no worry about that."

Dire states

Having Jess return to his arms, Carson doesn't withdraw. Instead, he offers what she needs - pure and simple comfort. Even though they had gone their separate ways, and even though Carson had known that friendship was the only thing that could be between them... feeling needed was a sensation that he didn't mind one bit. He knew that Jess had been making more friends, but he also knew that she trusted very few. And to be the one she needed... he was only too willing to be there for her.

Carson holds her close, giving her back a gentle rub, and rocking her lightly. "It's okay," he assures quietly. "You'll never be in a safer place than this. I promise you that. And we'll find Peter... don't worry... we'll find him." He hadn't even realized that he'd included himself in the "we" until it was out of his mouth.

After holding Jess for a few moments, he finally pulls her away just as little bit, wiping her tears with his hands as gently as he could. He knew his palms were rough. "I want you to stay here," he directs gently. "I know you don't like it, but it's best until we can get Peter off the street for good."

He offers as much of a smile as he can. "And I want you to get some rest. Let me get myself cleaned up, report in to Reese and everything else I need to do. Then I'll be back... and maybe I'll even bring that milkshake for you." He tosses Jess a quick wink.

"Come on." He leads her to the bed where he gestures for her to sit down. "You'll be out of the chaos in here, alright?" He ruffles her hair a little, trying to bring a smile to her face. "I'll be back, I promise."

Not wanting to leave, but knowing he must, Carson slips out of the room. Only when he was out of sight of Jess does his facial expression change. It's hard. It's cold. It's angry.

Stalking down the hall, he stops at Angelica's office. He doesn't even knock, bypassing all formalities. Swinging the door open, he barely keeps it from banging back against the wall. His eyes blazed. "What do you know about Peter Sanford?" he demands. "How did he get out, and do we know where he is?"


Both Rick and Jason continue to struggle with Ryder, even after Misty comes to help. Though Katie comes, Rick goes for a second sedative. Again, it's worthless.

"What's this guy made out of?" He tries to catch his breath, fighting Ryder's strength.

Jason struggles too. "I don't know. Ask the crocs he's taken down."

Rick's surprise makes him falter a moment, and he gets an elbow to the gut.

Ryder hurls a curse through the air. Screaming, he tries to rip himself loose, by now, his shoulder giving out a steady stream of crimson, mixing with his sweat.

As Katie approaches and touches him, he flinches, his eyes wildly searching her face, groping for recognition. Sweat stings his eyes and he squints, still pulling against the three that were fighting to keep him still.

Jason can feel a shift in emotions, and consciously slows down his own flow in order to give Katie more freedom to help.

Ryder's heart races, his pulse pounding in his head. Everything was blurry and the panic ran deep. But suddenly something started to overshadow the panic, wrapping it in a comforting warmth. It almost felt as though someone had reached inside of him, down deep to find any amount of calmness and trust that existed, and had begun to pull it out, bringing it to the surface.

Staring at Katie, gradually, his pulse begins to slow, his breathing growing steadier. Without putting so much strain against the others, Rick and Jason are able to relax a little bit, finally gaining control again.

Ryder's body starts to drop from its tense state, and his eyes start to droop as he fights to stay conscious. Still looking at Katie, his surroundings slowly come out of the fog, her face coming into focus. "Katie?" he mumbles. Despite his groggy state, somehow he suddenly understands Katie's words, and realizes that what he'd been fighting to get away from had been his imagination. "Dang..." But he can't even finish his statement as his eyes roll back in his head.

Now instead of fighting, Rick and Jason struggle just to keep Ryder from falling onto the floor.

"Get him back on the table," Rick orders. He knew Misty was right. They had to get some more blood into Ryder, and fast. He'd gone too long without treatment and now was intensely weaker than just minutes before. "Thanks, Katie."

Yes, hats off to ya, Hero. You saved the day once again.
Jason lets Rick and Misty set to work on Ryder, now confident that things were back under control. He nods to the door.
Probably shouldn't leave just yet, but... join me in the break room for some coffee? We might as well get out of the way in here now.

Ryder writhes on the table, somewhere between being awake and unconscious. A fever had set in, and he shakes with cold chills. Rick gives up on another sedative and just focuses on helping Misty get the wound closed up. He wanted to go back to look for the antidote, but unfortunately, right now Ryder was in a more dire state. Rick's fear of losing someone was always present, but today it was worse. He had two people in here now who needed their help... would either make it through?


Clint shifts his weight a little, not wanting to crowd Wendy. He takes a sip of his own coffee, then looks down at the steaming liquid. "Yeah... I've been up... for a while." He sighs, then looks back up to her. "I've been working nights in town," he finally admits. "I... didn't tell you because I didn't want you to worry about me. But... I guess Mick convinced me that keeping it a secret was stupid, so..." He shrugs in defeat, lifting his mug a little. "Here's to your stupid fiance. May he quit learning things the hard way."

Taking another sip, he just hopes that the coffee will wake him up. This morning he wouldn't even get his two hours in.

"Sorry I didn't tell you..." He grows a little more serious. "I just... want to provide is all I guess... and... I want you to have enough and... and be happy."

safe

Jess trys to talk but can hardly find the words in the crowded room of people. So much was going on around her she felt horrable for bothering the others with her problem that seemed so small, but as Carson's strong arms take Jess into a hug she cant help it any longer as the small tears trickle our of the courner of her eyes.

Looking up at Carson Jess trys to blink away her tears. She still hurt, but she almost felt numb. It was strange yet confusing and Jess didnt know how to feel all together.

"I...I dont know. I am hurt and confused. Things were going so good and now they have fallen apart again. They havnt gotten Peter yet eather...and what if he comes back again.."

Jess voice hightens again as the sound of panic courses through it the fear evadint. Not much in life scaired Jess but Peter was one thing that did.

"...if he knows I am here again...and comes for me next time I wont be so lucky and he'll kill me."

Jess eyes are wild with fear as she moves herself into Carson's arms again. She wanted to be shelterd, she wanted to be protectid and Carson was her walls.

As Ryder grabs Misty's hand and spills the items onto the floor she gives a jump back. She wasnt sure who this guy was and she wasnt about to get into the way of someone who might be crazed. Though seeing Jason and Rick go for him in the maner they did Misty knows he is friend after all.

Going to the counter quick Misty gets the seditive and hands it to Rick trying to get Ryder to calm down herself. Looking to Jeason she states.

"We have go to keep him still or his is going to harm himself more. He cant aford to lost anymore blood before we can get a transfustion in him."

As Katie sees the comotion she cant help but feel a tiny bit sorry for Ryder. He didnt mean to hurt anyone he was just confused and not sure where he was. After losing so much blood anyone would be woosy.

J your gonna have to hold him still. I dont know if he will knows its me or not.

Coming closer to Ryder Jess shows no fear and she nods to Misty to help hold him. Drawing close she looks Ryder in the eyes and brings a soft hand to the side of his face.

"Ryder its Katie, your ok now. Your back in Nevada and your at the TJY headquarters where it is safe. Please let Misty help you, for me."

Katie continues to focus her energy twords Ryder letting her own calmness run off onto him hoping it would help to calm him down enough to let the setitive work.

Slowly opening her eyes at Clint's voice Wendy gives a small strech, her back ackes a little from laying on it but now that her belly was starting to grow it was just easyer to sleep that way.

Giving a warm smile to Clint Wendy sits up proping the pillows behind herself and takes the coffee from Clint sipping the warm liqued.

"Mmm...Good Morning. Your up pretty early. I though you would sleep in a little today."